how can I show child how to wipe his bottom

[mygifts1306]

My son is 8, and really struggles when its no2 time, he just cant wipe his bottom, i have wiped it for him for a while, but i feel now that he is 8 and is starting to show keeness to visit other people, he will be going for swimming lessons with his class, its really time he did things himself, this has been going on for a number of year, i have tried the social stories, i have drawn up a toilet manual, i have tried picture, i try to make it easier for him by using the flashable wipes from asda, but he just cant wipe his bottom, i was wondering if parents of children with additional needs struggle too, my son was diagonsed with AS in 2008 and more recently was diagnosed with ADHD

 

thanks for reading

 

Jax

[Chris P]

Speaking from personal experience of exactly the same issue...are you sure that your son isn't frightened by the toilet? Repelled by smell/'dirtiness'? Disliking of the texture of your loo paper and/or the stuff you have bought to avoid him needing to deal with loo paper? Afraid of losing balance and falling while reaching round behind himself?

Edited June 19, 2011 by Chris P

[Kazzen161]

I would split this up into small steps, and try to work out where the problems are.

 

eg: Can he wipe an object that is placed in front of him? Does he know what "wipe" means? Can he wipe a part of his body that he can see? etc

[mygifts1306]

Thanks Kazzen and Chris P, it is quite possible he hates the smell, but i dont think anyone likes the smell. I will break it down into small steps, and tell him what wipe means, I showed him the motion expected( with my clothes on) also told him its best when he is seated as opposed to standing up. thanks very much for your responses Jax x

[Chris P]

Glad to help. When I say he might 'hate the smell', this would of course be on a much more dramatic scale than simply 'not liking'. It could be worse: you could have a child who loved the smell...

 

Kazzen's advice is also good, and it sounds like you have a good plan emerging: the trick will be to recruit your son's willing involvement, as otherwise it could turn into a horrible emotional situation. If you can bear it, will you post on how it all goes? I suspect there are others who are facing/will face this dilemma. Best wishes. Chris

[BusyLizzie100]

My youngest son is also 8 and also struggles with bottom wiping. For him I think it really is the idea of not being clean that worries him, ie adequate wiping and then hand washing. I think he also finds the flushable wipes a bit uncomfortable, too, since they leave him feeling a little damp down below...

 

For my eldest, when he was younger his problems with bottom wiping had more to do with co-ordination difficulties, for example he had difficulty crossing the midline, which is OT talk for having difficulty using one hand on the other side of his body (or down the middle of your body). Part of his exercises involved doing big sweeping gestures, eg getting him to wipe the bath or windows or wash the car. He's pretty successful with wiping now, by the way, at 13, although we still have to remind about hand washing... and those flushable wipes do help.

 

No answers, I'm afraid, but keep plugging away and praise and reward even the tiniest step forward. Try not to make it a battle and encourage him as much as possible.

 

Hope that helps,

Lizzie x

[mygifts1306]

Thank you buslizzie, think this will take quite a long time to get him really confident, so i shall keep this thread alive and let you folks know how we are getting on.

 

thanks xx

[baileyj]

Hi my son also wouldn't wipe his bottom, after a long time we eventually found it was because he was worried about getting his hands dirty. His Peidiatrician suggested we try latex gloves, like surgical gloves. My lovely local hairdresser gave me some (powder free)to try as a test and they worked a treat. We now buy boxes of 100 online, we keep a little bin by the loo, and a box of the gloves at the side of the loo, he pops a pair on, wipes, and pops them in the bin. He's now 10 and this has worked successfully from about age 8. We found we had to wait until he was ready to do this, and just took our time.

 

Good luck

 

Jo