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Great News Jay starts his news school next monthx

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Jay starts his new 52wk residential specialist school in July, we got the confirmation today that commissioning panel have agreed to fund his new placement and we are so happy as we have fighted for so long for this, the school is part of the priory group services and they have been really great with us, especially me, his classroom is really nurting and cosy and a proper little haven and his teacher motherly and understanding.

 

Jay cant wait as he is allowed all the stuff he has at respite in his new school, so TV, Xbox, Phone, the rooms are all fitted, so they cant throw furniture and pull off doors and the bed cant baracade the door, so its all safe.

 

The reliefe is emense, soon as the news was confirmed my shoulders just felt instantly lighter and the stress just washed over my skin and I know things are just going to be better now, no more traveling for Jay who has had to travel to three different placements all over England, now its all in one in the beautiful lake district, he so matches the Lakes, full of adventure and energy A perfect match.

 

The plan now is to work on Jay transitioning to the new school, how we get all his stuff from his respite to the school is anyones guess he has loads to pack.

 

Its my Birthday next week and I couldnt of asked for a better Birthday Presant.

 

Its the news weve been waiting for ages and we have finally got there.

 

JsMumxxxx

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:thumbs: :thumbs:

 

So glad to hear this has been sorted out at last and I really hope J can now settle and start to make some real progress in all areas as there's been a lot of disruption and change in his life recently.

 

Happy early birthday! :)

 

K x

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Thats fantastic, so pleased, will he be able to come home for weekend visits?

 

 

The first two weeks Jay Starts we cant see each other at all, just phone contact the school say children settle better that way, then the third weekend the school are paying for ME to stay in a Hotel and I will then spend Saturday and Sunday with J, then on the 6th Weekend Boys who can usually go home for the weekend, Due to J been on a ICO its just daily contact at the moment, we go back to court at the end of July and I have just had a Mental Health Assessment carried out by a court psychiatrist, if the report says I am well enough to have J for weekends then were hoping that J will come home weekends.

 

So it depends on the mental health assessment report really.

 

Me and J have decided to concentrate on settling in at school and to enjoy the contact days as both get a lot out of them as its quality time.

 

I do want J to come home for weekends eventually but want to really make sure J settles in at his new school.

 

We got the final date today and its less than 4 weeks.

 

The new school have rang and are making transition plan, a lady from the school is going to be visiting J over the next four weeks to get to know him better and I am compiling the Childrens portfolio book from Cebebra a free book that is made of the child so that the new school know as much as possible about J, the school are also going to be doing a social story and bringing photos to show J of his Care staff and his new residential unit at his new school so were all really trying to ensure the transition is as smooth as possible.

 

Working today with the new school was a really nice too.

 

I have some great news too, I have a going to be a volunteer at a local community service.

 

 

JsMumxxx

Edited by JsMum

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Hi, great news about the School I am so happy for you both. Hope all goes well, keep us updated :) Glen is settling in well. Going up to see him again on the 9th of July with my daughter and elder son.

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J`s mum and Jeanne so glad to hear your news about your boys, and well done J`smum, you always pick yourself up, dust yourself down and start all over again :thumbs:

 

All is calm here for the last few days, but we are having a rocky patch both at home and at school at the mo.

 

Enjoy your Hotel visit, be like a mini holiday!!

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J`s mum and Jeanne so glad to hear your news about your boys, and well done J`smum, you always pick yourself up, dust yourself down and start all over again :thumbs:

 

All is calm here for the last few days, but we are having a rocky patch both at home and at school at the mo.

 

Enjoy your Hotel visit, be like a mini holiday!!

 

I am gonna love the hotel weekend stay in the Lakes, J was well happy when he heard the staff say that they will put mum in a hotel for weekend, J is going to be having a mini summer camp, the new school lady said that they do lots of activities and days out over the summer and with him been in the lake district its the ideal location for absailing and hiking,there are around 20 other boys who come and go over the summer holidays so he wont be the only one their over the holidays as some are looked after children so he is going to be fine I am sure.

 

Enid here anytime if you want a chat, just pm if things are getting hard again, a problem shared is a problem halved.

 

Ive just cut my grass ready for J tomorrow as he comes home for the day tomorrow, we might be going to a farm.

 

JsMumx

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I'm so pleased things are starting to work out for you and Jay. I hope you enjoy your weekend in the Lakes!!

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I am gonna love the hotel weekend stay in the Lakes, J was well happy when he heard the staff say that they will put mum in a hotel for weekend, J is going to be having a mini summer camp, the new school lady said that they do lots of activities and days out over the summer and with him been in the lake district its the ideal location for absailing and hiking,there are around 20 other boys who come and go over the summer holidays so he wont be the only one their over the holidays as some are looked after children so he is going to be fine I am sure.

 

Enid here anytime if you want a chat, just pm if things are getting hard again, a problem shared is a problem halved.

 

Ive just cut my grass ready for J tomorrow as he comes home for the day tomorrow, we might be going to a farm.

 

JsMumx

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UPDATE

 

J started his new 52wk residential special school on Monday, I met him at his new Priory group school and I unpacked his TV, XBOX, Books, Games, DVDS, Orniments, trophies and got his room all organised and his stuff set up.

 

We spent the day together and I stayed the night locally then the next day was his Looked After Care Review 3 months have passed since the ICO.

 

Its flown passed to be honest and it went well, Im going to be visiting fortnightly staying over locally.

 

Ive had the Psychiatrict report and it sadly says that without support I will not manage J on my own for weekends and due to my own mental health difficulties I wont manage on my own so its daughtful J will come home overnights.

 

The psychiatrict report was very distressing however, very detailed and very personal, dreadging up my life which was hard to read, nothing the social services didnt already know!

 

Its looking very probable that Social Services will obtain a full care order.

I am back in court at the end of September.

 

The most important thing however is that J now has a new school, a fresh start and he is in one provision no more traveling the breagths of the country, he has been throw so much bless him.

 

J has taken to the new schools like a duck to water though, he has done so well, Im so proud of him.

 

He loves the outdoor astroterf and they have loads to do, he hired a DVD yesterday and watched that in his bedroom.

 

J has a visual Timetable and weekly menu now and for the first time he knows in advance what he is doing at school.

 

I dont see J now for another two weeks then I visit again for the weekend, the school are taking J and other boys on holiday, the boys on the unit have excepted J no problems, one of them played yesterday with me and J playing a very good game of football.

 

The staff have been brill, very patient and understanding.

 

Ive slept better the last few days than I ever have done.

Im relaxing and taking it easy for the rest of this week and then on Monday Im going to start my fitness regime and get fit.

 

Its a fresh start for the pair of usxxx

 

JsMumx

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Hi so pleased to hear your news, good luck to the both of you. You both deserve the very best :thumbs:

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That sounds really fantastic, so pleased for you both. It's taken a long time but you got there! :)

 

K x

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Hi Js mum

 

It may be best for J to stay at school constantly anyway for a while as it will give him the stability and continuity he probably needs right now.

 

Remember that the psychiatrist's report is not 'forever' - as you say you are sleeping better and relaxing, knowing that J is safe and happy (that's not to say he won't have his bad days - we all do!). Treat the next few months as a healing time for you both. I don't know what a Full care order means and whether it can be reviewed/removed in the future. But I do know that J needs you more than ever now, so just enjoy your time together and enjoy this part of his youth. After all the difficulties you both deserve to have some happy treasured shared memories >:D<<'>

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ooh thats so good to hear, but sorry to hear about the report, hope your court case goes well, if not you will manage as you are now.

 

My J is back to 4 mgs and all is calm for a bit. they have recently built a 10 bed unit on his school site, they already have a residential that J attends I night a week (if hes not excluded) however this new unit offers full time care and I have been offered a place, the plus is, its his school, its 15 mins away, he knows all staff and is familiar with residential staff. whats not to like??? the downside. all children on section 20 to secure funding.....

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ooh thats so good to hear, but sorry to hear about the report, hope your court case goes well, if not you will manage as you are now.

 

My J is back to 4 mgs and all is calm for a bit. they have recently built a 10 bed unit on his school site, they already have a residential that J attends I night a week (if hes not excluded) however this new unit offers full time care and I have been offered a place, the plus is, its his school, its 15 mins away, he knows all staff and is familiar with residential staff. whats not to like??? the downside. all children on section 20 to secure funding.....

 

 

Enid Ive come to terms with the fact I can no longer manage J on my own, I was contemplating a section 20 but the solisitor advised me against it saying It would be hard to get him back home again in the near future, kind of wished I had of done a section 20 now because social services have a section 38 now and soon a section 31.

If it needs a section 20 at the resi to secure funding then Id do that but ensure you get legal advise first maybe a solisiotor in SEN.

 

Js still on his Prozac which the new school ensured he had a fresh supply as I was to distracted to sort out his prescription but they took in their stride and got him sorted out. J says he really feels the difference when he takes the proper dose.

 

I dont regret the decisions Ive made, he has his needs met now and that is what matters.

 

J seemed very settled last night the sign is that our phone call was short and he seemed very happy.

 

JsMumx

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Thanks for reply. the thing thats getting to me is, its just about money/funding, he dosnt need to be in care, and no one is suggesting he should be, but to access more than 92 days a year, and give the other 3 kids and me a break, unless he is on a section 20, he wont be able to. J himself would like to, he is 16 in a few weeks, his older brother went off to college, mon to fri, at that age, he is really up for the idea, not full time, but weekly, but unless I can sort something out it wont be possible. It would really get to me to have to have a LAC review when I was just doing it as a "paper exercise" the Head is looking into it for me to see how she can help, will keep you posted. x

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Don't underestimate the stress and pressure you have been under for a long time and how that will have taken it's toll on your health. Now that your child is in a place where he is happy and is permanent and you can relax, you may find your own health begins to pick up. It may take some time, but it's an upward spiral. Whatever the history, I think it is worth always pointing out to anyone involved how long you were having to cope (years???), before this placement was finally sorted. In actual fact you have probably done brilliantly considering you already have mental health issues. I don't have any, but have had times when I thought I was heading in that direction due to things not being resolved for my child. So don't be too hard on yourself.

 

Enjoy your freedom, and travel as often as you can to visit him - and maybe in the future you would be able to go out for the day together. Don't try to run before you can walk. Just make it clear that you do want to remain involved - as you always have been. And IF you had received the support and placement earlier, you might not have sunk to the depths you did.

 

Just so glad it is going well for you both.

Edited by Sally44

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Know this is an old topic but logged on for the first time in AGES, and wondered how J`smum was doing?

 

As for me, my son is 17 and a half now, didnt get the placement as only just opend last month due to delays and he isnt deemed priority anymore, which is good, still goes on night a week and now has a weekend every 6 weeks.

 

Life is good... when I think back to the awful years, when the good folk on this forum were the only thing that kept me sane! I am sooo glad to be out the other end.

 

hope alls well with you all.

 

Enid.

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