potty training and aspergers

[bubble]

hi all i am new to this forum, this is my first time posting, my son is being assessed for aspergers, Paed won't give diagnosis just yet she wants to see him a few times first, however i am trying to potty train him and he just doesn't want to know, he is nearly 4 and going to nursery in September and i really wanted him to be dry before then.

 

he has a lot of sensory problems and we have introduced the potty slowly and steady so at least he is not terrified of it now, he will sit on it and has done a few wee's on it but doesn't seem to get the wanting to go so will sit on the potty, he does it where he is standing if you get what i mean.

 

i thought i would ask for any advice before i give up.

 

thanks

[justine1]

Hi

 

I think it won't help giving up especially if he is at least making some wee's in the potty. It may take him longer but try not put a time limit as he may be picking up on the stress, if he is not completely dry when he starts pre-school the staff will be able to go through ways to get him dry, as long as you are both working on the same page.

 

My second son with Aspergers went straight onto the toilet having never used the potty, he did stand up to wee and never sat except to poo.He was potty trained by 2 1/2 years old. Oddly enough my youngest son who recently turned 3 has completed his potty training in the same manner. Having tried him on the potty at home and nursery for the past 5 mths I almost gave up, three weeks using toilet only and he is dry all day !!

 

Just keep trying and I am sure he will get the hang of it soon.

[LisaKaz75]

Hi, my little boy is nearly 4 and has attended preschool for the last 12 months. He too is not toilet trained. However, we get assistance from a specialist incontinence nurse and she visits my son in his preschool setting too

Leo too does not seem aware of wanting to go to the toilet and we are (and nursery are) following a program put into place by the nurse. I am happy to share this with you.

She believes that Leo is not aware of the feeling of his bladder being full. So what she advised is to only give Leo drinks at breakfast, morning snack, lunch, afternoon snack and tea. Encourage him to drink as much as he wants. Then about 20 mins to half an hour later put I'm on the toilet. The theory is by giving no other drinks, he will drink enough for his bladder to get full and then it's a matter of working out when to put him on the loo.

We have some success with this. Though admit in the summer it has gone off the rails a little as when it's warm I tend to slip out of the routine a bit

Preschool have had more success as they have the same routines everyday, so I am definitely going to follow the same routine next term

Not sure if he gets the process. Baht he gets lots of praise for weeing or pooing on the toilet and hope to continue with this

Still don't know if he will ask to go but it's a start if you know he needs to go at a set time after a meal

 

Hopes this helps

 

Lisakaz

[flappyfish]

I do feel for you. Both my boys were dreadful and I still have nightmares about washing huge numbers of revolting pants and trousers years later! No great advice, but encouragement to keep going and that you will get there in the end. Who knows, you might even look back and laugh!!

[Sammysnake]

My daughter also didn't like the potty - she used it once I think and then went straight onto the toilet. I think it made more sense for her as that's where she saw everyone else going in order to have a wee etc. I also support a child in school who wasn't clean or dry in the day until Year 3. For several years we had a routine of going into the bathroom every hour or so and 'trying' and managed to minimise the number of accidents that way. She didn't feel under pressure because it was just what we did every day. Later I started prompting her through the day asking if she needed to go but taking her every 1.5 to 2 hours if she hadn't been. Eventually she started telling me when she wanted to go - hoorah!! Don't panic as your boy will get there when he's ready. There are lots of children in Reception at my school who have accidents (we have boxes of spare clothes and plastic bags for just such eventualities) and we've had other children who've arrived in pull-ups and very quickly decided they wanted to be a 'big boy' or 'big girl' and start using the loo like their peers so they can wear pants or knickers too. Good luck, it'll work out. <'>

[baileyj]

Hiya, my son was very similar, we eventually got him dry at 5, he went to nursery still in pull-ups.

 

What we did was have several potties, 1 in each room, so he saw them all the time, then in the summer months let him run round with nothing on his bottom, I know not ideal, but he started weeing in the garden, which seemed to get him used to the sensation of needing to go by seeing it, when it happened we'd scoop him up and put him on a potty, so he began to associate weeing with the potty. Gradually we reduced the number of potties, and just kept 1 in the bathroom, so he started to associate weeing with the bathroom, then we bought a potty that looked like a loo, kept it in the bathroom, and finally went cold turkey and removed that. Also, all nappy/pullup changing we did in the bathroom, so he associated that with the toilet to. It takes a long time, and needed patience. Ive lost count the amount of times we sat singing in the bathroom, or all quietly cheering when he used a potty. Also because he could read, we had a chart on the bathroom wall, numbered with what to do, eg 1) pull down trousers, 2) pull down pants etc etc. Nursery had the same chart in all the loos too. Now at 10 we are starting to teach him standing up wee's by doing target practice in the loo at a ping pong ball, the fun and games continue.

 

Good luck, don't loose heart, its just that our kids take longer thats all, but they do get there.

 

Jo