HFA and severe social anxiety

[Louis' mum]

Hi all

 

My son was recently diagnosed with HFA at the age of 21.

He has had social anxiety since childhood and is now virtually agoraphobic and would never leave the house alone. His therapy has been mainly CBT which has been completely useless. He has steadily got worse and now spends most of his time in bed. I love him dearly but don't know how to help him and feel at my wits end , so much so that I have been offered CBT myself! He seems unconcerned by this situation but admitted to being 'unhappy'.I worry for his future, Does anyone have a similar experience?

Edited September 17, 2011 by Louis' mum

[darkshine]

Hello

 

I have a similar experience in that I'm diagnosed with Asperger's (earlier this year) have social anxiety and agoraphobia and during the last 10 years have spent way too much of that time in my bedroom (and at bad stages in bed)...

 

Currently I spend 90% (minimum) of every week in my home.

 

I'm waiting on CBT...

 

I don't know what it's like from a parent's point of view though - hope you find what your looking for

 

Best

 

Darkshine

[smiley1590]

i was agorphobic before being officially assessed or diagnosed with AS which is why mum took me to docs as wouldn't leave the house without parents was scared to was having panic attacks is your son depressed too? if spends his time in bed and is 'unhappy'? have you thought of meds for anxiety disorders? may help him take the anxiety edge of the situation? does he have an support worker or social worker?

 

XKLX

[charlotte]

i have not been agorphobic but have had mental health problems counselling and other forms of therapy. I am wondering if those you have had therapy with or will have therapy with have experience of working with those with ASD I have have found this and spending time with others who have ASD has made a big difference.

[Louis' mum]

Thanks for the replies everyone,

 

Louis is on moclobemide which is an old drug for anxiety which works quite well to take the edge off his symptoms. I have been told he isn't depressed by the psychiatrist but I'm not convinced.

Louis has always been treated in a mental heath context and did attend a social inclusion facility for a while but couldn't relate to the others and said they were 'mentalists'!! I have suggested he attends a group for people with ASD, which I could attend with him but he won't even consider it. I've tried to get one to one counselling with a woman who specialises in ASD and anxiety but it is out of area and I won't be able to get the funding

I really don't know where to go next.

[Louis' mum]

After much cajoling and persuasion Louis has agreed to let me contact the lady who runs the ASD group with a view to us both going along to the next meeting

[Louis' mum]

Hey I was wondering about something....

 

Louis is VERY keen on an on-line computer game called World of Warcraft.

Its a blessing and a curse because he has a kind of cyber life through this game and does communicate with others through it but on the negative side, does it stop him from trying to go out into the real word? Does anyone on here play on this game?

[Tally]

I don't see any harm in someone getting enjoyment and social contect through the internet, whether it be forums, games, or whatever. The problem can be when the person gets so involved that they stop going out because they find the computer easier or they have become addicted to it. In those cases then yes, it can stop people from getting out into the real world. If he's playing it all day, having fun and socialising easily, then what motivation is there for him to do anything else?

[darkshine]

That's good news that he's agreed to try

 

As for the game - I refuse to buy it because a few years ago a friend of min lost around 8 solid months of their life to that game (and several month either side) - and I've heard of several others who have done the same. I watched my friend play it when I visited and it is very alluring, the control, the fantasy, the interactions - it feels like you could be something better than in real life, and people come up to you for help, so people need you, and you can look like and be like whatever you want and you aren't different or weird, and being able to control it and be in charge of the actions, and all actions have very clear and obvious consequences (less confusion), and the skills you acquire make you better but in a clear and visual way - the progression is clear and easy to see. And the gaming world is just huge - it feels like there are endless possibilities that are actually attainable.

 

The positives of playing this (in my opinion) far outweigh the negatives - until self-awareness comes back and people realise what they are doing (i.e sitting in front of a pc way too much!!!)

 

My friend is ashamed now that they spent so much time sitting playing a game and living in a virtual world - but me, I can see the appeal because real life is not like the things I listed about the game is it?

 

It can be a very addicting escape...