Why Don't I Feel As If I Don't Have Asperger's

[leeds_demon]

I've looked at various posts in General Discussion and have come to the conclusion that maybe I don't have Asperger's.

 

I can laugh at funny tv/radio programmes. Sometimes I can look people in the eye. I don't have a monotone voice. I will admit to havin meltdowns, but they're very few and far between. It's not as if I don't want to go out, it's just that I can't be bothered. I don't have the facial charactersitics that the research team, led by Professor Kritina Aldridge, at the University of Missouri, suggest that people with Autism have.

 

I can make small talk with people, if I have to - I don't find making small talk really difficult, a such. I might have told the clinical psychologist, who assessed me, a little white lie re: making small talk. I can talk to people and once I get started, sometimes I can't stop. I may not need a reason to talk to someone, which I told the psychologist I did, but I might have trouble keeping the conversation going, unless me and the other person are talking about a subject that I'm interested in.

 

I've been led to believe that Aspies don't bother to ask people how they are, what they do for jobs - that they don't show much interest in other people. But I do. Ergo, how can I be an Aspie?

[trekster]

It's possible you have found ways of adapting to your environment.

I can also laugh at things I find funny. Does your looking people in the eye avoid staring at them?

My voice is also varitone. Being unmotivated to do stuff of little personal interest can be an aspie

characteristic. I haven't looked to see if I have the facial characteristics of autistics.

 

I didn't realise until recently that I was able to make small talk with others. The not being able

to stop talking is an aspie behaviour as well. Also difficulty sustaining topics of little personal

interest is an aspie behaviour.

 

Aspies can forget to ask others how they are due to being distracted by their own thoughts.

[Sally44]

AS is a spectrum condition. There maybe some things you can do and others you can't. There are different levels of functioning. I recently saw an actor that is diagnosed with Aspergers [can't remember his name], and initially I wondered how he could do that job with AS, but he actually explained himself very well in how acting is a rote learnt thing, using a script. And I think that is the point with alot of AS adults is that they have 'learnt' how to do some things, but they are not automatic and that they do certain things because they know that that is what others do and they do it to fit it. It isn't something they choose to do.

 

Problems with social communication can range from an adult being non-verbal to the other extreme of an adult being unable to stop talking about their interests.

 

Asking other people what they like etc is something that can be learnt, or could come naturally to a certain extent especially if you are with someone who is interested in the same things.

 

I've also been told that those on the spectrum can have differing degrees of theory of mind. Some have none, others may have quite alot of theory of mind.

 

I don't think this "facial characteristics" of an ASD is worth thinking about. It isn't proven. And it is suggested that there maybe more than one single cause to ASD, and therefore if there is any link between an ASD and facial characteristics that may only apply to a small number of people.

 

How were you diagnosed?

[bid]

I've looked at various posts in General Discussion and have come to the conclusion that maybe I don't have Asperger's.

 

I can laugh at funny tv/radio programmes. Sometimes I can look people in the eye. I don't have a monotone voice. I will admit to havin meltdowns, but they're very few and far between. It's not as if I don't want to go out, it's just that I can't be bothered. I don't have the facial charactersitics that the research team, led by Professor Kritina Aldridge, at the University of Missouri, suggest that people with Autism have.

 

I can make small talk with people, if I have to - I don't find making small talk really difficult, a such. I might have told the clinical psychologist, who assessed me, a little white lie re: making small talk. I can talk to people and once I get started, sometimes I can't stop. I may not need a reason to talk to someone, which I told the psychologist I did, but I might have trouble keeping the conversation going, unless me and the other person are talking about a subject that I'm interested in.

 

I've been led to believe that Aspies don't bother to ask people how they are, what they do for jobs - that they don't show much interest in other people. But I do. Ergo, how can I be an Aspie?

 

I have a formal, NHS dx of AS...and I laugh (alot), I'm often jolly and bouncey, I love clothes, make-up, jewellery and SHOES, I've been married for 18 years, I have 4 kids, I work in a full-time, responsible job leading a small team...

 

Oh, and the only facial characteristic I have is a bit of a large nose...but that's my dad's fault!

 

Maybe I don't have AS either!!

 

The only thing that worries me, is that you say you lied to the psychologist...why would you do that?

 

Bid

Edited October 26, 2011 by bid

[leeds_demon]

I have a formal, NHS dx of AS...and I laugh (alot), I'm often jolly and bouncey, I love clothes, make-up, jewellery and SHOES, I've been married for 18 years, I have 4 kids, I work in a full-time, responsible job leading a small team...

 

Oh, and the only facial characteristic I have is a bit of a large nose...but that's my dad's fault!

 

Maybe I don't have AS either!!

 

The only thing that worries me, is that you say you lied to the psychologist...why would you do that?

 

Bid

 

Sometimes I do have to have a reason to talk to people. My Dad, in the car back, from visiting my Mum in hospital, said that he thought I wasn't good at making conversation. I've re-read the report from the assessment and I have been thinking to myself about what I said. I suppose I could socialise with people, if I so wished to, but I just can't be bothered to; also, it would mean me having to spend moeny and I hate spending money.

 

I suppose I could make small-talk with people, if I so wished to, but sometimes, I find it difficult as to what I should say. For example, if I see my neighbour, Betty, I'll go and talk to her and might not need an excuse to say hello. Which is what I told the pyschologist. But then again, I find it easy to talk to Betty.

 

I can't say that I've 'learnt' how to laugh at funny jokes/programmes, or how to look people in the eye. It just comes naturally to me. Sometimes I can look people in the eye. Maybe I got the idea into my head that I can't look at people, from when I did a presentation at college and i didn't look at my fellow students - ergo maybe I was lying about not looking people in the eye?

 

And yet, I have other Aspie traits, such as spending most of my day in my nightwear - I work from home. I get easily stressed out about things. When I was sharing with someone, I induced a couple of panic attacks in her, because I verbally laid into her - once when I lost a pen and the n the second time, when she lost my debit card, I had lent to her. I'm not keen on people, whom I don't really know, such as workmen, using the toilet in my house. I'm not keen on the idea of staying overnight in a B&B, as I might have to sue the loo, given that's it's been used previously.

 

I do have a good long-term memory and good personal hygiene - I've been told that Aspies have poor hygiene standards. It takes me ages to get round to washing dirty dishes, sometimes days go by, without me washing them, then all of a sudden, I will do the dishes, hoover upstairs, etc. I still have to clean the fridge/freezer top, which is covered in dust from cat/dog biscutits, etc and I still haven't changed the kitchen towel that lines the shelves in my food cupboard.

 

But I can't remember someone telling me to look people in the eye, how to make small-talk, etc.

 

The thing is, anyone can lie to a psychologist; all you have to do is look up the symptoms of Asperger's, put on a monotone voice and not the psychologist in the eye. Simple!!

 

Plenty of people don't look other people in the eye when talking to them. Plenty of people hate certain foods. Plenty of people have poor hygeine standards, but do all these behaviours make them Aspies. There are lots of people, who don;t have friends, are they Aspies?

 

The second psychologist I saw, who was still in training to work with Aspies, saw me for a couple of follow-up appointments, (the psychologist, who assessed me was on maternity leave). I asked the second psychologist, if it was possible to lie about having AS and she said no. In her discharge letter, the psychologist writes that she is in no doubt that I meet the criteria for AS.

 

So why do I feel a fraud?

[bid]

Well, to be honest, I don't really know where you have got some of your ideas from!!

 

Why on earth do you think it is an AS trait to spend the day in your nightwear?? Or that everyone with AS has poor standards of hygiene?? Or only speaks in a monotone??

 

To be completely honest, to me this seems like an odd mish-mash of stuff you've read, maybe on-line??

 

I think you are over-analysing the whole thing about initiating conversations/not socialising.

 

I'm not quite clear...do you have a formal dx of AS? If you do, and you had a thorough assessment by someone experienced in adult dx, then I think you can be confident that you do have AS.

 

Bid

[leeds_demon]

Well, to be honest, I don't really know where you have got some of your ideas from!!

 

Why on earth do you think it is an AS trait to spend the day in your nightwear?? Or that everyone with AS has poor standards of hygiene?? Or only speaks in a monotone??

 

To be completely honest, to me this seems like an odd mish-mash of stuff you've read, maybe on-line??

 

I think you are over-analysing the whole thing about initiating conversations/not socialising.

 

I'm not quite clear...do you have a formal dx of AS? If you do, and you had a thorough assessment by someone experienced in adult dx, then I think you can be confident that you do have AS.

 

Bid

 

Yes, I have a formal dx of Asperger's. Re: the nighwear thing. I prefer wearing nightclothes, as I can find dayclothes, such as skirts and blouses a bit too restrictive, if that makes sense. If you look up the various AS traits, then poor hygiene is one of them.

 

I have been formally assessed by one psychologist at the Sheffield Asperger Syndrome Service and the second psychologist, who was being supervised by a senior colleague, as she was undergoing training, also said that I have Asperger's. The second psychologist noted: 'I am in no doubt that Emma meets the criteria for Asperger Syndrome and in fact, it is due to her difficulties in abstract thinking and central coherence that I feel she struggles to see the wider picture as to why she meets the criteria and instead, focuses on specific details, which may or may not, be consistent with diagnosis.'

[bid]

Well, I think your highlighted section answers your question for you!!

 

Things like poor hygiene, wearing night clothes, etc, are very much secondary, and as your highlighted quote says, they may or may not be consistent with dx. You could equally say that being excessively neat and being obsessed with hygiene are traits of AS. Your difficulties with abstract thinking and central coherance, and the focussing on tiny details, are far more characteristic of autism than hygiene and clothes preferences, which will always differ from individual to individual.

 

You have a formal dx, from a very well-respected centre...so I think you can feel confident that you do have AS <'>

 

Bid

Edited October 27, 2011 by bid

[cmuir]

I've looked at various posts in General Discussion and have come to the conclusion that maybe I don't have Asperger's.

 

I can laugh at funny tv/radio programmes. Sometimes I can look people in the eye. I don't have a monotone voice. I will admit to havin meltdowns, but they're very few and far between. It's not as if I don't want to go out, it's just that I can't be bothered. I don't have the facial charactersitics that the research team, led by Professor Kritina Aldridge, at the University of Missouri, suggest that people with Autism have.

 

I can make small talk with people, if I have to - I don't find making small talk really difficult, a such. I might have told the clinical psychologist, who assessed me, a little white lie re: making small talk. I can talk to people and once I get started, sometimes I can't stop. I may not need a reason to talk to someone, which I told the psychologist I did, but I might have trouble keeping the conversation going, unless me and the other person are talking about a subject that I'm interested in.

 

I've been led to believe that Aspies don't bother to ask people how they are, what they do for jobs - that they don't show much interest in other people. But I do. Ergo, how can I be an Aspie?

 

 

Hi

 

I cannot comment on what it's like to have AS, but can comment given my observations of my son and others who do. The only point that I can make is that although professionals may be use or refer to checklists, is that not everyone ticks every body. My son's eye contact, for example, can go from being non existent to very good (it's variable), and he can have quite a good sense of humour and can usually pick up and understand sarcasm, etc.

 

Difficult to know whether you do have AS, but usually formal diagnoses aren't given lightly and it is normally a lengthy process that involves a number of specialists who may well speak with relatives, etc. Just as some professionals perhaps don't diagnose individuals who have AS, that's not to say that it doesn't work the other way i.e. some may be diagnosed incorrectly, but for the aforementioned reasons, I would guess that's a very rare occurrence. Could it be that you don't feel you have AS because you've developed very good coping/management strategies for things to the point that it's second nature and no longer seems like an issue? Could it be you have doubts because of your perception of AS and general awareness? Hope that doesn't come across as critical (certainly no meant that way). Lastly, we all (NTs, Aspies - everyone!) has little idiosyncrasies and I guess it can be difficult to distinguish between what may be AS-related and what's just regular personality-related (does that make sense?).

 

Best wishes.

 

C.

[Tally]

I think you've picked up on some things that do seem to apply to some people with asperger's, but not all. For example, a person with asperger's might have difficulty with personal hygiene because they are disorganised and forget to wash, because they have sensory difficulties that make washing uncomfortable, or because they don't recognise the social importance of keeping clean. These do not apply to everyone though. I personally like to be clean. There is a big thread on the forum about people who don't laugh. I'm quite surprised because all of the aspies i've met do smile and laugh. As for choosing not to socialise, this is a sign of asperger's. Most people feel it's so important, that they do choose to spend money on socialising. Talking too much can be an issue in asperger's and night indicate that you can't read other people and tell when you need to stop talking. We can be very unaware of how we come across to others, so it's possible the doctors are seeing difficulties you are not even aware of. I think it would be helpful for you to speak to someone to get a better idea of what actually your problems are as they see them. That way you can also check if they have any inaccurate information.

[leeds_demon]

Hi

 

I cannot comment on what it's like to have AS, but can comment given my observations of my son and others who do. The only point that I can make is that although professionals may be use or refer to checklists, is that not everyone ticks every body. My son's eye contact, for example, can go from being non existent to very good (it's variable), and he can have quite a good sense of humour and can usually pick up and understand sarcasm, etc.

 

Difficult to know whether you do have AS, but usually formal diagnoses aren't given lightly and it is normally a lengthy process that involves a number of specialists who may well speak with relatives, etc. Just as some professionals perhaps don't diagnose individuals who have AS, that's not to say that it doesn't work the other way i.e. some may be diagnosed incorrectly, but for the aforementioned reasons, I would guess that's a very rare occurrence. Could it be that you don't feel you have AS because you've developed very good coping/management strategies for things to the point that it's second nature and no longer seems like an issue? Could it be you have doubts because of your perception of AS and general awareness? Hope that doesn't come across as critical (certainly no meant that way). Lastly, we all (NTs, Aspies - everyone!) has little idiosyncrasies and I guess it can be difficult to distinguish between what may be AS-related and what's just regular personality-related (does that make sense?).

 

Best wishes.

 

C.

 

 

What coping strategies. I've never been taught to hold my gaze when talking to someone - no-one, apart from one of my tutors at college - has said that I don't look people in the eye. I mentioned to the psychologist at Sheffield that I say things that cause offence to people, but I only did this once when I was at university & I asked a lecturer if she thought about wearing make-up, so I wasn't being totally truthful, when I told her that I say things that cause offence; although in the past, I did tell my mum that I didn't want to end up being like her.

 

Re: my diagnosis. The assessment took two hours - some of the time Dr. Telford was chatting to my Mum and Dad. The dx was based on the questionnaire, that my parents filled out out, but when I saw the questionnaire in a follow up session,. most of the answers my parents gave, were 'can't remember' or N/A. My parents did point out that I lack socials skills due to not socialising and that I am tunnel-visioned.

 

I also read that Aspies are not good with money, whereas I am. When I've been out shopping, I come home and write down everything I spent, making sure that what i have left in my purse corresponds with what amount of money I should have leftover. I also check my bank accounts online at least once a day and write down what I have in my bank accounts maybe every other day, especially if I have withdrawn money, or a direct debit has been paid. I have about 100, maybe more A4 pieces of paper, detailing my daily spending and how much I have in my accounts.

 

Re: wearing night clothes. Gary McKinnon would just stay in his underwear.

[darkshine]

Maybe there should be a self-test for proving that someone does not have Aspergers - I'd try it

 

To be honest I find all the contradictory descriptions to be frustrating - at the moment I can't be bothered - but over the last 6 months I have alternatively searched for information to both prove and disprove my diagnosis and have got nowhere - I think that I think too much

 

I think people can fake it - from what's been said on here I don't see why someone couldn't get a diagnosis by acting the way all the descriptions say - the thing that would make it hard would be the personal history and if parental input was required and if the descriptions weren't lifelong then they shouldn't even consider diagnosing someone - having said that I guess some parents might "be in on it" or something.... very cynical... not impossible though I think...

[Tally]

Again, i think that not being good with money is something that some people with asperger's find, but it is not part of the diagnostic criteria and many do not have this difficulty. Obsession and constant checking can also be associated with asperger's - a lot of people wouldn't have the executive function to monitor their spending that closely. I don't think you can assume anything gary mckinnon does constitutes asperger's syndrome. He has his own interests and personality, not everything he does is attributable to his asperger's syndrome.

[philipo]

Like many of the above posters have said don't focus too much on 'definitions of accepted' ASD/aspy behaviour.one of the great difficulties is that ASD's have such a wide range of symptoms/ways of being that its almost impossible to make a fast assesment,combined with the fact that many traditional accepted mistakes are very alive and well,like maths genious,obssesive behaviour,monotone voice ,no laughing etc......just be yourself and don't measure yourself against definitions.it's obviously complicated by the individual bias's.I saw southpark last week,they did one about 'aspergers',it was obviously a spoof and expressed a far more enlightning approach/understanding than most local health authorities who think autisim/asd/aspergers etc is one notch off shizophrenia and bi polar personality 'disorder'.Be yourself.and dont gamble unless your good with numbers.

[trekster]

Well, to be honest, I don't really know where you have got some of your ideas from!!

 

Why on earth do you think it is an AS trait to spend the day in your nightwear?? Or that everyone with AS has poor standards of hygiene?? Or only speaks in a monotone??

 

***Those happen to be my autistic traits as well apart from the monotone which my longest friendship has.

 

To be completely honest, to me this seems like an odd mish-mash of stuff you've read, maybe on-line??

 

I think you are over-analysing the whole thing about initiating conversations/not socialising.

 

***Analysis of situations including people is also an autistic behaviour.

 

I'm not quite clear...do you have a formal dx of AS? If you do, and you had a thorough assessment by someone experienced in adult dx, then I think you can be confident that you do have AS.

 

Bid

 

From what the original poster has written im fairly confident they have AS. I feel they may have compensated in a way for their AS without realising. For example the tv program 'catchphrase' is educational to me as it helps with my literal behaviour. i ask people what various expressions mean and im told, remembering them or explaining them to others can be a problem though.

 

it is possible the OP has other stuff apart from autism and feels 'something is missing' until my EDS/HMS diagnosis i was also thinking the same but am content with the diagnoses that i have now thats the puzzle connected.

[Sidewinder040]

The people who have assessed you, don't you think they would have seen through your 'act' if you were exaggerating your symptoms? Although i havn't officially had a diagnosis, i can speak ok to a handful of people, but i ignore other people i am unsure about. I am careful with money and weigh up my motives for buying things. Do i want or do i need the thing i am thinking of buying. I look up on Amazon reviews of the thing i want and compare. Don't you think that maybe these are Asperger traits, the having to over-think things through, to assess ones motives?

Also I am very conscious about my appearance and hygiene, I would feel ashamed of myself and 'out of control' if my level of personal hygiene slipped. Also when you said you had an argument with someone when you couldn't find something, I always have a place for everything, even if it isn't tidily stored away, i like to know where all my belongings are, i hate to have to waste time looking around for things. I feel guilt when i feel like i am just humouring people when they try to talk to me and i feel guilty that i can't show my emotions. I know that is a 'man-thing', but i seem confused about the emotion i feel and don't know how to interpret them, i have to logically work out what i am feeling and why.

 

I would say to you that you have had your diagnosis, but that you are in denial. If you didn't have good reason to get a diagnosis in the first place, why are you doubting those reasons now??

 

I don't want to be labelled or stereo-typed, but i think that when you know your problems or short-comings, then you can move on from that point with a better knowledge in how to either over-come your problems or find ways around them.

 

I have spend a long time trying to act 'normal' and telling myself that when i think that i feel different from other people it is just me being silly. You are an individual and you have a right to be yourself, as the song says 'Life is not worth a damn until you can say i am what i am'.

 

For me learning about Aspergers has been a revelation to me, it has shown me why i have my funny ways and it has made me more determined that armed with the knowledge of my problems, i will learn to be the best that i can be. I will not wallow in self-pity or think any less of myself that i know i have AS. I am wired neurologically differently and it makes me interpret thinks differently and sometimes i can inspire people to think of problems in a more logical way, that maybe they wouldn't have otherwise done, because i helped them think from a different angle.

 

Keep an open mind,

 

Sidewinder.

 

 

y y

[AspieMe]

I think the bit about the money suggests to me that you are poor with money. Many NTs don't need to plan to this level of detail to manage their money, I'm just as obsessive and when I don't plan I will lose control of my finances very quickly. Ask yourself what would happen if you didn't obsessively manage your money, would you get along just fine or would you wind up regularly overspending.

 

I felt many of the feelings you have right now after my diagnosis, but after reading in detail about Asperger's Syndrome it dawned on me that I'm actually a lot worse than I think I am and I now see why there was no real question about the doctor's decision.

 

I found it helps to be critical of yourself when looking at the diagnosis, you may not be aware at just how hard you work at things until you break them down. The bit about socialising and small talk, yes, many of us can do it, but it takes a lot of effort to keep it up, perhaps this is why on many occasions you "can't be bothered".

[cmuir]

What coping strategies. I've never been taught to hold my gaze when talking to someone - no-one, apart from one of my tutors at college - has said that I don't look people in the eye. I mentioned to the psychologist at Sheffield that I say things that cause offence to people, but I only did this once when I was at university & I asked a lecturer if she thought about wearing make-up, so I wasn't being totally truthful, when I told her that I say things that cause offence; although in the past, I did tell my mum that I didn't want to end up being like her.

 

Re: my diagnosis. The assessment took two hours - some of the time Dr. Telford was chatting to my Mum and Dad. The dx was based on the questionnaire, that my parents filled out out, but when I saw the questionnaire in a follow up session,. most of the answers my parents gave, were 'can't remember' or N/A. My parents did point out that I lack socials skills due to not socialising and that I am tunnel-visioned.

 

I also read that Aspies are not good with money, whereas I am. When I've been out shopping, I come home and write down everything I spent, making sure that what i have left in my purse corresponds with what amount of money I should have leftover. I also check my bank accounts online at least once a day and write down what I have in my bank accounts maybe every other day, especially if I have withdrawn money, or a direct debit has been paid. I have about 100, maybe more A4 pieces of paper, detailing my daily spending and how much I have in my accounts.

 

Re: wearing night clothes. Gary McKinnon would just stay in his underwear.

 

 

I think the focus is always on checklists and how many boxes can be ticked (yet everyone is different – some things will apply, other things won't), not nust in terms of professionals, but people's perception of what AS is and how one should act, etc. You'e pointed out things that aren't applicable to you, but equally there may be some things are are? I cannot comment on whether you do or don't have AS (because I'm no expert and I don't know you personally), but I do wonder whether awareness comes into the equation i.e. how aware someone with AS is that they have certain traits. (Hope that doesn't offend (not meaning to), but I've been told that I have certain habits/traits (I'm NT), which I haven't previously recognised).

[leeds_demon]

I think the bit about the money suggests to me that you are poor with money. Many NTs don't need to plan to this level of detail to manage their money, I'm just as obsessive and when I don't plan I will lose control of my finances very quickly. Ask yourself what would happen if you didn't obsessively manage your money, would you get along just fine or would you wind up regularly overspending.

 

I felt many of the feelings you have right now after my diagnosis, but after reading in detail about Asperger's Syndrome it dawned on me that I'm actually a lot worse than I think I am and I now see why there was no real question about the doctor's decision.

 

I found it helps to be critical of yourself when looking at the diagnosis, you may not be aware at just how hard you work at things until you break them down. The bit about socialising and small talk, yes, many of us can do it, but it takes a lot of effort to keep it up, perhaps this is why on many occasions you "can't be bothered".

 

No I am not poor with money!! I am obsessed with making sure that I have money in my bank accounts, whuich is due to the fact that I was on JSA for around 12 years, (after finishing my Master's), and because I didn't have lots of money then,I don't like spending it now. I don't make much money as it is, bit it's more than what JSA pays.

 

I like the thought of having money in my accounts - even if I won the Lottery, I would hardly spend any money. When my Grandfather left me some money in his Will, I bought a watch and then I used the rest to help pay the bills and my parents criticised me for doing that, so maybe my not spending money is a reaction to their criticism?

 

Likewise, when my Ex asked for a loan, I dreaded the thought of lending it to her. I haven't bought new clothes for ages, as I hate spending money. I'll spend money on Christmas presents for my family, but this year, I will have to buy a present for my niece, who will be born in December - one more expense!! At least I don't have to buy my brother's Ex anything.

 

Tally: are you saying that I don't have Asperger's, because I monitor my spending?

[bid]

Oh dear!!

 

Leeds, I have a formal dx of AS from a very well-respected clinic specialising in adult dx...

 

BUT I don't wear my underwear/night clothes all day, I'm a very laughy person, I don't speak in a monotone and I have been in charge of the family finances for the last 20 odd years because I'm better at it than my DH and I check the balances online every day, etc, etc, etc!!

 

Please go back and re-read the section of your diagnostic report that you quoted in an earlier post...the specialist is answering the precise question you are asking in this thread!!

 

it is due to her difficulties in abstract thinking and central coherence that I feel she struggles to see the wider picture as to why she meets the criteria and instead, FOCUSES ON SPECIFIC DETAILS, WHICH MAY OR MAY NOT, BE CONSISTENT WITH DIAGNOSIS.

 

 

Bid

Edited October 31, 2011 by bid

[Tally]

No i'm not saying you don't have asperger's because you monitor your spending. I'm saying you are wrong to rule in out purely on that basis because it could go either way with asperger's. Some could be really obsessive about it, others might lose track easily. It really depends on what combination of traits you have and your personality.

[itsjustme]

Hi, I'm not diagnosed( maybe one day I'll be brave) but I think I know how you feel. Because you aren't the same as everyone else, even in an unusual group like aspires, where everyone is here because they're different, modern society thinks that people should be labelled, and within those labels you should act a certain way, etc.

 

This isn't the case. Imagine an exam at school. The chances that everyone will get the same mark are basically impossible, but a certain number will fit into the A grade, and the B, ect. I imagine ASD to be similar, you could be in the AS 'band' of it, but have less/lower impact AS symptoms. So aspires don't all have the same characteristics, just some aree more widely recognised than others. I'd say you have quite a mild case, if you can retain your function level almost all the time, and I don't think you should mind(if you do) that you have a baritone voice, ect ect.

 

[lilnicki]

It's an autistic SPECTRUM....... just because you don't have SOME of the features, doesn't mean you don't have it...... I too can look into peoples eye's because i've learned to do it. If you fulfill the DSM ( or UK equivalent) criteria, then that's enough for a positive diagnosis.

 

Nicki

[leeds_demon]

It's an autistic SPECTRUM....... just because you don't have SOME of the features, doesn't mean you don't have it...... I too can look into peoples eye's because i've learned to do it. If you fulfill the DSM ( or UK equivalent) criteria, then that's enough for a positive diagnosis.

 

Nicki

But I hevan't been taught/learnt how to look people in the eye, that's what I am saying.

[dekra]

But I hevan't been taught/learnt how to look people in the eye, that's what I am saying.

 

The lack of a common trait does not preclude a dx.

 

I have had 2 babies yet I have never suffered a day's morning sickness in my life - that does not mean I was not pregnant.

[lilnicki]

I closely scrutinised the DSM before i had my diagnosis.... i didn't want to waste anyones time if i didn't have it!!

 

Eye contact is not an essential trait if you look at that....... like i said, you only need to tick a certain number of boxes for a positive diagnosis......I'm sure you've done those online tests marked out of 50.....i usually score 40 to 42 on them. You don't have to score 50 out of 50 for AS.

 

Nicki

[bobbybaggio]

I've looked at various posts in General Discussion and have come to the conclusion that maybe I don't have Asperger's.

 

I can laugh at funny tv/radio programmes. Sometimes I can look people in the eye. I don't have a monotone voice. I will admit to havin meltdowns, but they're very few and far between. It's not as if I don't want to go out, it's just that I can't be bothered. I don't have the facial charactersitics that the research team, led by Professor Kritina Aldridge, at the University of Missouri, suggest that people with Autism have.

 

I can make small talk with people, if I have to - I don't find making small talk really difficult, a such. I might have told the clinical psychologist, who assessed me, a little white lie re: making small talk. I can talk to people and once I get started, sometimes I can't stop. I may not need a reason to talk to someone, which I told the psychologist I did, but I might have trouble keeping the conversation going, unless me and the other person are talking about a subject that I'm interested in.

 

I've been led to believe that Aspies don't bother to ask people how they are, what they do for jobs - that they don't show much interest in other people. But I do. Ergo, how can I be an Aspie?

 

How old are you? It's common for an Aspie to learn how to make small talk. It's taken me years to get to the level I'm at....being 31 now. I used to be petrified of meeting someone on my own because I didn't know how to make or keep a conversation going. Now I'm much more confident, I have my slip ups but people see it as quirky so I get away with it.

 

I too used to have meltdowns but as I've gotten older I've learned to cope better with life. I think you should stop doubting and instead give yourself a pat on the back because you've learned to cope very well with your aspergers.

 

Well done