Do I have Aspergers?

[Alex248297]

Hi, my name is Alex and I am 23 and female. I have recently moved in with some friends and one of my friends thinks I have Aspergers or Autism (she has an autistic brother and a sister with Aspergers)

 

I have always been a little odd (so people tell me). I do funny things like walk on my tip toes, only eat and drink out od the same cup/plate. I only drink orange squash and do not like wet food. I also pull my food to bits before I eat it. I don't have many friends and find it hard to communicate with people in words. My friend says I do not show emotions or understand how other people feel. If you ask me how I am I will always say fine. I live my life in routines and if they get broken I go mad. I cry, screem and get angry. I watch things spin round and have a problems with numbers, I like them too much! I can tell you how many squares are on our wall paper, how many pannels in the garden gate. I count things where ever I go. I don't like odd numbers. The car sterio has to be on an even number or I get upset and angry. I don't like loud noises and people tell me to to take my fingers out of my ears all the time. I don't like crouds and find things like going shopping so scary, I hate being outside. People say I don't have an imagination as I can't think up stories. I don't get jokes and funny comments. I hate fiction book, I think they are a waste of time. I listen to the same song over and over again. I don't like physical contact. People say I don't play well and didn't when I was a child. I just use to spin things and line things up in order. I tap pens. When I am upset and in a rage the only things that calm me are music, fiddling with one specific thing and being on my own. I love things like christmas tree lights. I can't choose. if someone says peas or carrots I can't choose. Show me pictures of them and I will point. I don't know why I do that I guess I just find it easer to show people things than to try and explain.

 

I argued with my friend that if I had Aspergers or Autism I would have been diagnosed as a child. She said I was not as I moved house, area and school lots. I was just branded as a trouble maker. I always got in trouble for doing too well in tests and cheating. I didn't cheat, I just memorised things.

My parents said I have always been odd.

 

I don't like people calling me a freak and odd. My GP does not care or understand. Do any of you think I may have Aspergers or Autism? Please help me I hate my self for the stupid things I do.

 

Thank you

 

Alex

[FinalStraw]

Well it certainly sounds like Aspergers to me, I know that I share most of those traits. (Well at least 83% of them anyway!) You certainly don't sound odd to me though and I suspect that many people here will feel the same. Umm, anyway I am really useless at knowing what to say at points like this, but just wanted to chip in.

 

That seems really bad that your GP was totally unsympathetic towards you though, really not helpful.

[ceecee]

Hi

It sounds like aspergers to me too but also some of it is a bit like ocd.Aspergers and ocd often go together.I have both but luckily fairly mildly.I have to say if your friend has siblings on the autistic spectrum then she is likely to have a good idea of what she is talking about..Unfortunately until the 90s aspergers was relatively unknown.It was just thought that people were wierd or odd.Your not wierd or odd you are just you br proud of who you are and if you are happy being you then that is all that matters.I know its hard to come to terms with.I have only recently realised I have aspergers.Mine is very mild but it still drives me mad sometimes and other people!!Take care.There's lots of support here for you.

Edited December 3, 2005 by ceecee

[Zemanski]

There are many, many adults with undiagnosed AS; it was not known in this country until around 15 years ago so there was nobody to give a diagnosis when they were children.

 

Even now understanding of autism and particularly AS is very patchy and most adults getting support or diagnosis do so through the mental health services because they present to GPs with depression or OCDs or schizophrenic type symptoms.

 

if you could see another doctor you might have better luck (younger ones often have some inkling about AS even if they aren't that interested) and you can ask for a referral to someone who knows about autistic spectrum disorders or AS.

 

 

There may be a local support group for AS and/or autism in your area - they may help you sort out how to get an appropriate referral

 

if not you could try our local adult group for information (most of which will be specific to our area rather than yours but may help)

 

www.leedsaspergeradults.org.uk

 

good luck with it - it is not an easy path to travel and services for adults are few and far between (they're not very good for children either but not quite so bad)

 

 

Zemanski

[nellie]

Hi Alex, welcome to the forum.

 

Many adults are not diagnosed or diagnosed late. My husband was diagnosed with AS at 52, my eldest son with autism at 19 and my youngest son with AS at 24.

 

I would think you have enough indicators of AS to warrant an investigation.

 

This previous topic has some useful information which you may find helpful.

 

Have I got ASD/Aspergers?, I'm confused and seeking a diagnosis

http://www.asd-forum.org.uk/forum/index.ph...st=0entry7856

 

You will find lots of support and information on here.

 

Best wishes

 

Nellie xx

[Hectorshouse]

Hi Alex, I was not dx'd until after my son was dx'd, I don't think any of us here are qualified to make that decision, but much of what you have written is very aspie orientated. Try not to worry about it tho, it does not mean you are a freak or anything else like that, you may well be quirky, considered a bit odd by people and being ocd has its benefits sometimes, just not as long as its toooo ocd.

 

Nellies link is really good, I hope your ok, and welcome to the site.

 

HHxx

[caroles]

It's all this affecting your life really badly?Are you able to keep a job,etc,

It may be Aspergers or obsesive compulsive disorder,or deppression ,but you need to be assess first.Instead of going to the G.P saying all the odds things you do,as he is no going to take notice,hope you don't get upset,but he may thing you just read to much about aspergers,as you are just describing asperger syntoms and not how they are affecting your life,You can take your friend for support,if she wants to,G.P.make listen to her better,as she can probably explain exactly how this affects your life,maybe if you seem insolated,unhappy,not able to work because for alteration of routines,and poor communication,but you ,and your friend,or and advocate make have to be more clear about how your life is affected ,with lots of examples of daily thing that happen ,and how at change in your routine that day,etc has left sobbing you for hours,or when that party you could cope,or when you when to that supermarket with your friend all the things that happen ,if you can not go shopping,etc,who does the shopping for you?Who help you when a routine changes and you start crying,Do you go outside at all,or just always stay indoors,your friend,or someone that know you well can help you with all of that,as I think you may have a problem explaining how you feel ,how your life is affected and in realising that you actually have a problem.You need a diagnosis to whatever problem you got,so in one day you want a family,a relationship,etc,you are able to cope properly,as the world can not always be the way we want it,and routines keep changing all the time in the real world

[pingu]

Hi Alex

Welcome to the site, you sound like a lovely person. People here will understand you, everyone is lovely. I cant offer any advice as such as my son is 6 (AS) but from what you have said i would tend to agree with everyone so far. Hold your head high and have a chat to your GP.

<'>

Take care.

Shaz

x

[Alex248297]

caroles,

 

in answer to your questions...

 

up till I started living with my friend I just got on with doing the things I do, people sometimes told me I was odd but I just got on with my strange little life. Yes I do go out but I don't like to and avoid it at all costs. I go out because I have to not because I want to! I have been with my boyfriend for 3 years and put him through hell as I get angry and upset (i still live with him, we have moved in to a house with a couple of friends)

 

A couple of examples for you...

 

I eat the same thing for breakfast every day and we ran out of it. I got all upset and refused to eat anything different, my whole day was wrong. I had such a bad day because of the breakfast.

 

My friend said during a recent patch of bad weather "don't stick your tongue out or it will get struck by lightning" (i have my tongue pierced) so i did not open my mouth for 3 and a half hours! she told me later it was a joke! I didn't understand that and believed her.

 

My boyfriend made me take the dog for a walk with him and he kept saying "get off your ###### tip toes" I didn't even know I was doing it.

 

I prefered my life when people just avoided me because they thought I was odd. Now some one thinks I have Aspergers every one keeps going on about it and I feel like i'm the bad person. I don't realise I do the things I do. I just want to be normal. I am happy doing what I do.

 

Alex

[caroles]

Don't think you are a bad person,or abnormal,or anything like that. you are becaming really worry about your friend and everybody keep going about it,and anxious,Hope they don't want to change you,because you are what you are,is part of your personality,being different is o.k too,

I mean hope they are not 24/7 telling you you got aspergers,need to solve yourself out,because is not right,you are the same person that before,with aspergers or not.You could go to G.P and have a good talk about it,maybe get referred to someone with an understanding of aspergers,it may help you to talk about how do you feel about it,when you don't feel confortable near people,outside,etc,and take it from there,I like spinning objects too,little ball,coins ,etc and it feels good,but do it indoor only,they relaxed people under stress,like chewing objects,etc but I always notice when I do these things,and not in social situations I once thought why my child when under stress keep nodding his head,spinning,he has sensory problems,not autism,sensory overload,anyway have you try doing that with your head,nodding spinning,after a while is like being in some kind of drugs, is really a stimulation,and feels good,but is still unaceptable in public for an adult,same many other odd thing,is just getting the balance right ,between what you want,are happy with,and what is aceptable in the outside world,outdoors ,In your home,as soon as you are not hurting anyone they should just accept your odities,and just try to get the balance right,you can not change you way ,the way you have lived for the last 23 years ,that is the way you are your personality,and I bet you have to cope with your friends annoying habits,too,.

[Gordie]

Hi there, Alex - welcome to the forum. <'>

 

I'm a 24-year-old male, diagnosed with Asperger's, although I wasn't diagnosed until 4 years ago, when I was 20. At that time, I'd had depression on top of that for about 2 or 3 years. But of course Asperger's is something I've had to live with all my life - I just didn't know it until I was 20.

 

Within the Asperger's, I have what I call "OCD tendencies" ... not traditional OCD - the full-blown type ... but little quirks and traits that could be related to OCD. I think you've probably got some of these too, along with the Asperger's.

 

And yes - I do think you're a fellow Aspie. These are the traits you share with me ...

• not having many friends (except via the Internet)
• finding it hard to communicate with people verbally
• not showing emotions very often
• not understanding how other people feel (this is a very strong trait of mine)
• living my life in routines
• lacking in imagination
• not getting (some) jokes/humour
• hating reading fiction books (and not understanding how anyone could find any enjoyment in such an activity! )
• disliking physical contact (but only from family members ... from friends, I love it - )
• being very indecisive

But hey - lucky you! At least you've got a boyfriend! I wish I could get myself a girlfriend! The best I've ever been able to manage is a 2-year relationship with an American girl that I met on-line about 6 years ago, who I only got to spend 6 weeks with in person, when I got to live with her in her parents' house over there in the summer of 2001! Then I had to come home and face the music, and we decided it was best if we went our own separate ways (although we're still very good friends). I've been single ever since - that's 4 years now. So you're one-up on me there!!

 

So for that reason alone (although I am quite sure there are many others), you shouldn't hate yourself. Your boyfriend must love you - he wouldn't have wanted you to be his girlfriend for 3 years if he didn't, and if he thought you were a freak. But I know it's no fun to be called "a freak" or "odd". It seems to get better as you get older though - I know it has for me anyway, now that I'm a fully-grown adult. Back at school, it was horrid. And like you, I just thought I was weird, and that there was no real reason for it.

 

And also like you, I faced some opposition before I was diagnosed with Asperger's, from those who were supposed to know what they were talking about. Indeed from a qualified psychiatrist, no less! This was about 2 or 3 years before I was eventually diagnosed. It was my mum that suggested to him the idea that I might have Asperger's, having seen a few TV programmes about autism and related conditions that got her wondering. But instead of embracing the idea, he totally dismissed it! Needless to say, it didn't go down well with us, especially when I was eventually diagnosed. And equally needless to say, we haven't gone back again to see him since! That was a really crucial time in my life too. It was in the early years of my traumatic time at university, around 1998/99. I really could've done with some extra support then, but no - I got nothing, and my depression really suffered for it too.

 

Regarding getting upset if your routines are disrupted, have a read of this post that I wrote here on this forum about a month or so ago ...

http://www.asd-forum.org.uk/forum/index.php?showtopic=2408

... sound familiar? See - you're not alone.

 

James

[TylersMum]

Can I just add a posting that is unrelated in a way but relevant for me?

 

I am not autistic or Aspergers but my four year old son has ASD, diagnosed 3 weeks ago. Since then it has been information overload, so many numbers to call, benefit forms to complete etc etc.

 

My deep rooted worry for my little boy was what would happen to him as an adult. I've read through your postings and I'm not worried anymore.

 

I worried about whether he would have a normal life, would be hold down a job, would he have friends (even just one?) and what would happen when his father and I weren't around anymore?

 

You are all completely within what I would term "normal" and to know that there are so many others like Tyler out there, who would understand and accept him, fills my heart with hope for his future.

 

Thanks for the unintentional reassurance guys, and good luck to each of you.

 

Nicki

<'>

[cutie]

Hi I am 24 female with diagnosed AS (was diagnosed 2 months ago). I also have adhd and dyslexia.

 

From what I know not every one with aspersger show all the same or similar traits? I have always felt really confused because some of the common traits gordie mentioned dont seem to fit with me diagnosis

 

I have an imagination and I can play pretend play if i have to. Like with my daughter who is 4 i will pretend to be a princess or a pony etc...

 

That really above is my only worry about my AS is that i dont think i actually have a problem when it comes to imagination. I could write fantasy storys as a kid.

 

Also another thing with me is trying to understand what people actually mean when they say they 'dont understand how people feel'? I dont have a problem with that either. I meanwhen someone is crying i know they are sad and when someone. Like when I go to funerals i know that again people are very sad. Is that the thing that you mean?

[TuX]

Alex,if your gp does not care,go to another in the same surgery if possible,and tell them all the symptoms and history you have,and ask can can you be reffered onto a pysch for evaluation.

No,in fact-I think the current gp should refer you on regardless of not agreeing with it,as long as you showed them good reason for warranting a referral they shouldn't refuse you,

ignorance in general practicioning is far from non existant,so if he won't do anything-complain and/or see another gp about it.

 

 

 

I was just branded as a trouble maker.

Many,many originally undiagnosed autistics were branded like that,you are from an age when aspergers was virtually unheard of by the general public and teachers,and the common thing for them was to assume anyone acting wrongly,badly etc was just a trouble maker,whilst it's unbelievable that teachers could miss someone who was blatantly acting differently to everyone else /and unruly and agressive,they were just ignorant and devoid of any information relating to 'high functioning' autism disorders.

 

 

If you get a diagnosis,it can help in a lot of ways,first sort that lousy gp out.

Edited August 1, 2005 by TuX