What would be your biggest tip to any parent of ASD child?

[Sally44]

I suppose one of my biggest tips I would pass on was my decision very early on to get him to be able to swallow tablets by introducing vitamin tablets, tic tacs etc so that the sensation and feeling was something he was used to.

 

This has helped enormously over the years because whenever he has needed to take medication, he has been able to do it.

 

And that was why I started it. I was worried that at some point he would need medication and would refuse it.

 

Also holding the nose whilst swallowing liquid medication helps block out the taste/smell. Get them to keep holding their nose, and give them something nice afterwards like a spoon of chocolate spread to wash it down with.

 

Or mix liquid medication with warm cocoa.

[chris54]

To treat your child just like any other child.

Edited March 20, 2012 by chris54

[KezT]

To remember that EVERY professional involved has their own agenda and not to trust them to do what is the child's best interests. To do your own research and trust your own instincts.

 

And only cry when you're on your own.....

 

Sorry.....

[lindy2017]

Totally agree with you ..............ticking boxes and not reallly caring how your child feels been let down so much now dont expect anything good to happen have to deal with it ourselves...............................

[KezT]

A more positive one:) Don't give in to their food fads - start really young and always offer them nutritonally balanced meals. Remind them that their tastes change all the time and encourage them to try foods and retry them all the time. Don't make mealtimes a battle and don't make them a treat......

 

I am forever thankful that we have stuck by our guns on eating and DS now eats most foods, most of the time - he even has the set meal at school each day:)

[LancsLad]

To focus on the childs core personality as the defining element of them as an individual and to understand that ASD is a condition which often overpowers and masks that personality in our young lives.

[Pancakemaker]

To have a sense of humor and not give a damn what people think.

[caci]

_{Remember TINY, TINY steps are better than no steps at all`}

[robert7111a]

Go with your gut instincts with regard to what's best for your child. Research and get balanced views before trusting the professionals. There are good and bad ones out there. Do not rush into things just because somebody says "this is right for your child". You know your child better than anybody else

[Aeolienne]

Make sure they get work experience before leaving school. Don't assume that if they focus on their special interest they'll be able to waltz straight into a meaningful career on the strength of their degree result.

[lisac]

I would say, ignore any innapropriate behaviour that you cant change

[Sally44]

Another thing we discovered was that ANXIETY is ever present and often behind alot of behaviour and a need for rigid routines. And that IF and WHEN that anxiety is addressed, and pressure removed from the child and placed onto the adult or professional in charge, that you can see big improvements.

 

And that children with an ASD often do not recognise their emotional state, and so cannot communicate how they 'feel' to us. All they know is that they feel bad.

 

And sometimes those feelings are not processed until after the event, sometimes hours or days afterwards. So it can be hard to identify an immediate cause and effect.

[Sally44]

Regarding special educational needs I would advise parents to be proactive.

 

Learn about the SEN process in school. Get a copy of the SEN Code of Practice and read it.

 

Always ask to be referred by your GP to professionals that have experience and expertise in working with or diagnosing children with an ASD.

 

Don't wait for professionals to notice there is a problem and put supports in place. Parents really have to project manage things.

[caci]

Following on from something Sally44 said...... I agree anxiety is always present, however we have found the best way to help our son cope is to AVOID any rigid routines.

 

If he has a choice, he feels more in control and seems to be able to cope better.

 

This works for us, but for many kids, the idea of choice is scary and too much to deal with.

 

I suppose this leads to another piece of advise...

 

Everyone on the Spectrum is different and unique.

[sesley]

be positive, when you speak/communicate with them,keep language simple and allow processing time.You can teach them boundarys they do learn,be patient. Have a sense of humour,have a draw full of chocolate in your kitchen and a little drinks cupboard as well.Most of all learn as much as you can about autism,knowledge gives you confidence and helps you to understand your person and why they do or don't do things.Remember they are human beings whos view life/world differently focus on the strengths,the little steps of progress can be small and slow,but its progress at a different pace.

[Aeolienne]

Have a sense of humour, have a drawer full of chocolate in your kitchen and a little drinks cupboard as well.

What's wrong with leaving your ASD child to purchase his/her own confectionary from their pocket money? Then they will learn a useful life skill about money management: namely, that the more you spend on transient (and tooth-rotting) pleasures, the less there will be to spend on more lasting accoutrements such bicycles, computer games, clothes etc.

[sesley]

no the chocolate is for mums.

[chris54]

Try to make it seem you are interested when they are going on about some mind numbing subject and your trying to concentrate.

[Sally44]

I'm currently trying to master Yugioh card games!!!! Not making sense to me at all.

[Sally44]

And your child will amaze you time and time again by the facts and information they have absorbed. And I believe that even if a child cannot communicate that, they are still absorbing it. Infact an inability to screen out information is what causes them overload sometimes. But it also means they soak up information without even knowing it.

[chris54]

no the chocolate is for mums.

 

Oh, now I understand what the "little drinks cupboard" is all about.

[bed32]

Oh, now I understand what the "little drinks cupboard" is all about.

I think that's for the dads

[sesley]

time out for mums and dads is important.with the drinkies and the chocolate all for medicinal purposes of course. being able to establish who is the boss is important too.Its ok to set boundarys like for any other child for them,to learn how to be safe.

[chris54]

I think that's for the dads

 

If that's the case, I want a big drinks cupboard.

[Researcher]

Try to maintain some positive thoughts - things can change and you, your child with ASD and the rest of your family can get through the difficult times but don't be too proud to ask for help and support from trusted others when you need it (don't suffer in silence).

Be flexible and don't try to be something you aren't or try to turn your child into something they aren't.

[butterfly73]

To treat your child just like any other child.

indeed..

Or like R. Covey says.. 'the perception of the problem ís the problem'

a kid is a kid.. look at the behaviour, see what is behind it..

 

Also ...make sure you respect your kid, make sure he/she knows he/she is loved and important eventhough you might not always have the time you'd like to spend with them

really mention that also.. for kids think really black-white.. ie: y'kid wants to tell you something.. and you are on the phone, so you saay not now..t

the kid thinks he/she is not important.., the phone is.. there is no inbetween! So say you are on the phone, and you cannot do 2 things at once..

his/her story is important to you also, as is the phonecall.. so when you are done on the phone.. you can put your undevided attention to the story!

Stupidly enough, without any wish to do so.. even the most loving and considerate parents imprint fals beliefs by not being aware of the black.white perception of kids from véry early one..

they grow up feeling not important, feeling mistakes are bad, feeling they aren't good enough..

even if you know at a conscious level that that is utter rubbish,, the subconsious undermines even managers and big bosses each day, unless you

figure out when/how you got that believe and with that learn to see such situations thru grown up eyes who cán distinguish more visions than the black/white perception of a kid

* try marty lefkoe

* try affirmations... the once that make you feel squimish.. usually are the once that hold you down..

 

love, b'fly

[Sally44]

I also thought it worth mentioning about Siblings.

 

We have to dedicate alot of time and energy to our children with special needs and sometimes our other children get lost in the background.

 

So set aside some 1:1 time for your other kids. They often feel jealous, lonely and invisible.

 

Be open, honest and fair with them.