Very frustrating appointment with gp

[Mumof4]

Must apologise for ranting, but just got back from very frustrating appointment with our gp, explained all about my son to the , for all of you who haven't read my other post ( help needed)' my son is 18 has all the signs of being on the spectrum, he's just been fired from his job, because his boss said he can't follow instructions,.

The gp basically listened and said that because my son got average gcse results and because he made fleeting eye contact, he just is lacking in life skills. I asked my son how he found making eye contact, because he can make it it's very limited, he said I just did it to be polite, but said he found it hard, the gp said we could say that everyone is on the spectrum to some degree, and said a diagnosis wouldn't help.

 

I am at a loss as to what to do now:( , do I just send him to college In September and hope he copes.

The gp made it sound like my son would just grow out of it

 

Advice appreciated

[oxgirl]

Sorry to hear about that. I know that other adults have encountered difficulties getting GPs to take their concerns seriously, as I guess they consider that they have come this far without help. Gaining a diagnosis for a young child really only gets assistance with schooling and extra help with support at school, tbh. When they leave school there is little support out there for those diagnosed as children as well. Not that that's any consolation to you, of course.

 

If I were you I would enrol him in the course at college and explain about his difficulties. He won't need a diagnosis to get extra support at college if he needs it and if he can cope okay then that is all to the good. You could try going back to your GP with some back-up documentation, perhaps from his school, who could confirm that there were problems when he was there. Sorry, not much help, I know.

 

~ Mel ~

[lindy2017]

Change your GP ................theres good and bad.....

[Lyndalou]

This must have been very frustrating for you but it may be best to concentrate your energies meantime on helping your son to learn life skills. Giving him the opportunity to learn in the 'safer' environment of college is not a bad thing. I read that AS young adults can tend to spend more time in higher education before going on to 'work' - it's still putting the person is situations where they need to work as part of a 'team' (class projects etc) and need to learn to produce work to timescales etc. I wouldn't put a huge amount of emphasis on how well your son did in exams at school. If he has difficulties that have meant that he has struggled to retain information or understand the work, it is entirely possible that his grades are not a true reflection of his abilities. In a further education setting his abilities (and difficulties) may become more evident (IMO, the GP has no idea of this and is talking out of a hole in his head as he also is with his observations about eye contact).

 

If your son then does evening or weekend work the you might also be able to assess where his problems lie and he again will not have the same pressure to keep the job. Eg. I thought I could do a Saturday job on the tills when I was at college as I had worked in shops before. However, it highlighted my difficulties with numbers (I sought advice on whether or not I had dyscalculia soon after and was told that it was likely to be the case - I couldn't afford the actual test, being a poor student 20 years ago) and coping under pressure (I went to pieces when it was busy). However, over time I have worked a till in less busy environments and then in a voluntary situation where it was very busy at times and I learned first of all techniques and stategies to do the job reasonably effectively and secondly to cope with the stress of people coming at me very quickly!!

 

Edited June 23, 2012 by Lyndalou

[Sally44]

Can you see another GP?

 

I would suggest you go back and say to the same GP, but prior to the appointment send him a letter something like:

 

"I believe my son has Aspergers. This has caused him to lose his last job. He has significant problems which will impact on his dailing living skills. Having lost his last job he is thinking about going to college. He could receive additional help/support IF they know he has Aspergers. Therefore we need him to be seen and assessed.

 

Also he will have difficulties when his parents are no longer alive. Again having a diagnosis will help us get social services involved so that they can support him as an adult.

 

Aspergers is a life long disorder and is not something he is going to grow out of.

 

Could you please refer him to a multi disciplinary team that is experienced in diagnosing Aspergers."

 

Then see what happens.

[Mumof4]

Thank you for all your advice,

Sorry to hear about that. I know that other adults have encountered difficulties getting GPs to take their concerns seriously, as I guess they consider that they have come this far without help. Gaining a diagnosis for a young child really only gets assistance with schooling and extra help with support at school, tbh. When they leave school there is little support out there for those diagnosed as children as well. Not that that's any consolation to you, of course.

 

If I were you I would enrol him in the course at college and explain about his difficulties. He won't need a diagnosis to get extra support at college if he needs it and if he can cope okay then that is all to the good. You could try going back to your GP with some back-up documentation, perhaps from his school, who could confirm that there were problems when he was there. Sorry, not much help, I know.

 

~ Mel ~

I think we will explain his diffculties at college and see how he gets on for a few months and if it seems like a struggle maybe we will go back and see another gp , I appreciate that young children need to be assessed and seen with priority and rightly so.

It is just very frustrating how a gp who is not an expert in asd can spend 15 minutes with somebody and decide that they don't need help and there difficulties are not really impacting on their lives.

I suppose they have to judge on what they see, but it's almost like he thought my son has just come up with theses difficulties and we decided it was asd that afternoon.

Anyway thanking really appreciate your input and help.

Take care

[Mumof4]

This must have been very frustrating for you but it may be best to concentrate your energies meantime on helping your son to learn life skills. Giving him the opportunity to learn in the 'safer' environment of college is not a bad thing. I read that AS young adults can tend to spend more time in higher education before going on to 'work' - it's still putting the person is situations where they need to work as part of a 'team' (class projects etc) and need to learn to produce work to timescales etc. I wouldn't put a huge amount of emphasis on how well your son did in exams at school. If he has difficulties that have meant that he has struggled to retain information or understand the work, it is entirely possible that his grades are not a true reflection of his abilities. In a further education setting his abilities (and difficulties) may become more evident (IMO, the GP has no idea of this and is talking out of a hole in his head as he also is with his observations about eye contact).

 

If your son then does evening or weekend work the you might also be able to assess where his problems lie and he again will not have the same pressure to keep the job. Eg. I thought I could do a Saturday job on the tills when I was at college as I had worked in shops before. However, it highlighted my difficulties with numbers (I sought advice on whether or not I had dyscalculia soon after and was told that it was likely to be the case - I couldn't afford the actual test, being a poor student 20 years ago) and coping under pressure (I went to pieces when it was busy). However, over time I have worked a till in less busy environments and then in a voluntary situation where it was very busy at times and I learned first of all techniques and stategies to do the job reasonably effectively and secondly to cope with the stress of people coming at me very quickly!!

 

Hi,

Thank you for taking time to reply to my post , I agree that college is definitely the best route , and the pathway to Independance course with probably help, I will talk to college about my sons difficulties and see how it goes, it's nice to hear other people experiences .

I am pleased that you have found a some work you are comfortable with , wishing you lots of luck

[trekster]

Ring around the colleges and explain the difficulties in obtaining a diagnosis for your son. The educational psychology route could yield a diagnosis. i got my dyslexia and spiky profile disabilities diagnosed that way.

 

Also try the local autism strategy group, parent support groups, this report;

http://sacramentoasis.com/docs/8-22-03/taking_responsibility.pdf

 

The "Putting People 1st" report and other supporting evidence found on here;

 

http://www.autism.org.uk/get-involved/campaign-for-change.aspx

Edited June 28, 2012 by trekster