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      Depression, Mental Health and Crisis Support   06/04/2017

      Depression, Mental Health and Crisis Support   Depression and other mental health difficulties are common amongst people on the autistic spectrum and their carers.   People who are affected by general mental health difficulties are encouraged to receive and share information, support and advice with other forum members, though it is important to point out that this exchange of information is generally based on personal experience and opinions, and is not a substitute for professional medical help.   There is a list of sources of mental health support here: <a href="http://www.asd-forum.org.uk/forum/index.php?showtopic=18801" target="_blank">Mental Health Resources link</a>   People may experience a more serious crisis with their mental health and need urgent medical assistance and advice. However well intentioned, this is not an area of support that the forum can or should be attempting to offer and we would urge members who are feeling at risk of self-harm or suicide to contact either their own GP/health centre, or if out of hours contact NHS Direct on 0845 4647 or to call emergency services 999.   We want to reassure members that they have our full support in offering and seeking advice and information on general mental health issues. Members asking for information in order to help a person in their care are seeking to empower both themselves and those they represent, and we would naturally welcome any such dialogue on the forum.   However, any posts which are deemed to contain inference of personal intent to self-harm and/or suicide will be removed from the forum and that person will be contacted via the pm system with advice on where to seek appropriate help.   In addition to the post being removed, if a forum member is deemed to indicate an immediate risk to themselves, and are unable to be contacted via the pm system, the moderating team will take steps to ensure that person's safety. This may involve breaking previous confidentiality agreements and/or contacting the emergency services on that person's behalf.   Sometimes posts referring to self-harm do not indicate an immediate risk, but they may contain material which others find inappropriate or distressing. This type of post will also be removed from the public forum at the moderator's/administrator's discretion, considering the forum user base as a whole.   If any member receives a PM indicating an immediate risk and is not in a position (or does not want) to intervene, they should forward the PM to the moderating team, who will deal with the disclosure in accordance with the above guidelines.   We trust all members will appreciate the reasoning behind these guidelines, and our intention to urge any member struggling with suicidal feelings to seek and receive approproiate support from trained and experienced professional resources.   The forum guidelines have been updated to reflect the above.   Regards,   The mod/admin team
Mike_GX101

Do you feel loved?

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LancsLad   

Charlie C I can understand your sentiments. I have been a foster carer and I can say I 'cared' a lot for the kids in our care, I personally was closer to some more than others. We have since had our own son whom I 'love' deeply. I have to be honest and say there is a big difference in my feelings between the two. As such I fully respect your point.

 

Personally I do feel loved by my partner and son and it provides me with a lot of comfort in difficult times. I also know there are other individuals who care about me which is also greatly appreciated.

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Most of the time, no, I don't but this is due to how I feel inside... If I asked people in my family they would say they love me, but I don't always feel like they do...

 

I do however feel cared for by certain people and I care for certain people and that's a good feeling, especially when it's mutual.

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LancsLad   

A-S Warrior if golf clubs are allowed then I love you more than I love my golf clubs mate, if that makes you feel better. My golf clubs leaving me frustrated and wanting to wrap them around the nearest tree at times, you on the other hand A-S ......

 

........ put a smile on my face more frequently than I get from the current level of my golf.

 

Just a thought.

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i thank you for the compliment but golf should be a stress free game, its all about enjoying being outside and walking through beutiful green fairways. (or pine straw in your case)

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LancsLad   

Charlie one of the best things that has happened in my life is seeing one of those kids in our care grow to be a 26 year old who at the start of this year became a father for the first time. I said to him in some ways being able to have and give real love for your own child does not repair the fact you didn't recive that yourself, but it goes a long way. Whilst his son is only seven months and mine is seven years there will come a point when his son will give back that love, and that is a very special moment.

 

Charlie some day you might be in a similar position, personally I hope so because we all need a bit of unconditional love in our lives, both to give and importantly to recive,

 

best wishes.

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Charlie one of the best things that has happened in my life is seeing one of those kids in our care grow to be a 26 year old who at the start of this year became a father for the first time.

 

thats a good age to be a new father, i hope to get it done myself by then, ive always thought 24 would be a good age for me. i need an heir to my throne.

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My mother texts me at least once a fortnight to tell me she loves me. I also have a wife and daughter that love me too and of course I love them all dearly too.

 

But then on the flip side...I do feel many people hate me...

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Do I feel loved, no

 

But I was married once an I could count on one hand how many times my ex said she loved me in marriage, only four times.

 

I said I loved her often and her reply was she doesn't feel it though she suspects my kind of love is totally different to everyone else's idea of it.

 

And that may be the cruxt of it all, we feel and express differently and no one understands us lest of all ourselves.

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Yes, I feel loved by a small number of people: my parents (although I don't think my Dad loves my diagnosis!), a friend or two, and my partner - he's been the most interesting one - he knew me before my diagnosis and says that my Aspie traits are many of the things he particularly loves about me, even when we weren't sure that it all added up to AS, for example my child-like enjoyment of silly things, (I got incredibly excited last week when I saw pumpkins in the shops for the first time! Lots of jumping around and hand clapping!), not being afraid to act the fool in public etc etc :) In general, people seem to like me, but it's not the real me, they like the "masked" version of myself, the one I have carefully honed to resemble someone vaguely neurotypical. At the same time though, I probably irritate and frustrate a lot of people, with all my strange ways. That makes me somewhat despondent, but I can't really be sad about it, because I don't really like a lot of people either! :D I like the idea of people, but in practice, my frustration tolerance levels are low :)

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david3   

I have difficulty recognising being loved therefore I have difficulty feeling loved.

I think feeling loved and being loved are two different things.

I apologise if I disturb anybody's sense of security.

If feeling loved makes you happy, ignorance is bliss.

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