My experience of son being in Psych Hospital under Section

[Mandapanda]

Hi all

 

I haven't forgotten that I was asked to give my thoughts and feelings about my son being in hospital. It's just that it's all been much busier than I expected!

 

It sounds awful when I say my son was sectioned under the Mental Health Act, but actually it really wasn't that bad. Yes it was stressful, but we knew he needed help and he needed it quick, and things wouldn't change whilst he was at home. It was heartbreaking seeing him so desperate not to go to hospital, but it was already heartbreaking seeing him just sitting in his room, filthy dirty and virtually starving himself, totally withdrawn and isolated.

 

He was there for 3 months, initially under Section 2, but then voluntarily (after they cocked up doing a Section 3).

 

An unexpected bonus was that there was a little school within the hospital and they had trips to Calshot Activity Centre.

 

At first, it was really hard as we thought we'd get a break while he was in hospital, but in fact we had to go to visit on both Saturday and Sunday the first weekend to have dinner with him in their dining hall. Then we also had to visit on a Wednesday eve, then they added in Family Therapy and other meetings, so there was a lot of to-ing and fro-ing.

 

The first few weeks were frustrating as they were just observing him in order to assess him, so they weren't actually doing any therapy. We were desperate for any little signs of change but of course they didn't come immediately. He coped better with actually being there than we had imagined. Even now he still won't admit that it was in any way good or helpful!

 

He had started getting his sleeping round to the right time 2 weeks before going into hospital (in the hope he wouldn't have to go), but being in hospital means that is now well established. This has made a difference to us as we can now do what we want during the day (wash hair, shower, hoover, etc). Another amazing thing is he agreed to have a new bed. He came to a bed shop to try them out. He's got his new bed now and seems very happy with it (we think the bed in the hospital proved more comfortable than his old bed - though no doubt he would deny that!).

 

He gets up and dressed in the morning, whereas he used to stay in his PJs all the time. I have lots more washing now, but that's how it should be.

 

He communicates better with us. He can explain things and we listen, so we are all getting on much better. I still find it really frustrating at times, like today when there were no white plastic plates clean so he wouldn't have a sandwich for lunch. We have plenty of china plates but he says they are too heavy. We have found out why he finds going to some places so hard. He needs short journeys, and the place needs to be quiet, virtually empty, and small. A crowded train journey up to London was way too stressful for him.

 

In hospital he talked with a Psychologist who explained all about phobias and why we react like we do etc. Can't say it's really made much difference. He still won't have his window open no matter how hot the room is, and we have to have an insect curtain on the door from the dining room to the hall when we have the patio doors open. He still would not agree to eat outside at all. But at least he will go out for walks now. He does a mini panic if he sees a dog, but copes quite well really. He hasn't been in the garden to spend any time at all for years (he only walks through the gate and across the patio to the back door).

 

He doesn't shower that often, but much more frequently that it was (he didn't have a shower for a whole year!). He still has to have a brand new sponge each time (good job it's not every day, it would cost a lot!).

 

He cleans his teeth most days, and he has been using his current toothpaste for longer than any before (he suddenly decides it's 'no good' and bins it).

 

People and going out are still difficult. He won't go to the NAS youth group nearby, or archery (which he's done before and said he was interested in doing again). He doesn't even want to see old friends again, and says he'd be better making new friends at college. He wouldn't even come out of his room and say hello to his brother's friend who he knows really well.

 

Education is a major difference thanks to the little school. They said he was the only person to ever have 100% attendance rate there! He said they got him used to the school environment again. And the assessments they did boosted his confidence a bit too. HE appeared to enjoy some of the visits to Calshot, and joined in with group activities like basketball. They helped him apply to colleges and we've been for a meeting at one. We are waiting for a second meeting where they will have worked out what courses he could do, probably Maths, English and Science GCSEs. The intensive therapy nurse is going to take him on a bus trip to practice for college. Although there is a slight chance he might get a 'Moving on Statement' which could entitle him to transport (which he would prefer). They have quiet rooms at the college and can arrange for him to come and go at different times if needed. He's been going through a Maths GCSE book with me and doing well. I'm not convinced he'll cope at college but it's certainly looking more possible than before he went into hospital.

 

Eating: better than it was, but he's not really trying any more new foods at home. He has 3 or 4 choices of each meal and we just rotate them. He won't eat any salad stuff, so I still end up doing different meals, but at least he has increased the variety (slightly) and quantity that he eats. He eats his main meal with us but eats breakfast and lunch in his room - the compromise was that he make his own lunch as he has to come downstairs to do that.

 

He is engaging with the intensive therapy nurse, and came to see the Psychiatrist at CAMHS. These were never going to happen before he went into hospital.

 

Haircuts: he doesn't seem to want to see our usual hairdresser (I think he's worried she'll ask about hospital), so we've been going to a local barbers. He says they are 'more professional'!

 

All in all, we have all survived, and there have been some improvements, though not yet any quantum leaps. Being taken out of the home situation did shake him into doing things he wasn't doing, and has reignited his enthusiasm for getting an education. He has never fully engaged with the process so probably hasn't got the full benefit, but it was definitely worth it.

 

He has grown and looks much healthier, changes his clothes, eats more and a few more different things, will go for a walk over the local shop with dad to get a paper (and some chocolate!), will go for 20+ mins walks, will go to local museums etc., and says he believes he will be able to go to college. So we are all in a much better place than we were before.

[darkshine]

Wow Manda, reading all that it's just incredible the changes that have happened - don't forget that lol - cuz at the time this is all happening it's all too easy to feel like changes are slow and small - and that there are areas where stuff still needs to happen - but it really seems like you could all be at a turning point here - I know there's gonna be more to do, and there's challenges and trials - but together as a family it sounds like things are in a better place than 6 months ago - who knows what it will be like in another 6 months

 

I quite often forget the steps I've made - it seems like I get nowhere and everything feels like a battle - and even when it improves - it still feels like a battle and I forget how much things have changed - then I look back a year and I see it.

 

There's so much hope for Aw and your family and you - there really is - because things can change for the better for all of you - just gotta celebrate the little steps cuz once you've taken 50 little steps or Aw has - and you look back - those 50 tiny steps can look a long way.

 

All the best

 

Darkshine

 

PS - Thanks for letting us know how things have been for you - although I suspect it's been a lot harder then you let on - none of this has been easy but what doesn't kill us makes us stronger - you've coped brilliantly with this, engaged with the family therapy and have supported Aw and the rest of your family - smile for a bit cuz now is a time to acknowledge stuff and breathe a sigh of relief before you carry on again.

[lindy2017]

I could identify with your experience ........nice to hear its getting better.......

[JeanneA]

Hi Mandy, good to hear from you. Thanks for letting us know how your son got on in hospital. It sounds like a lot of positives have come out of it. I wish you all well as a family for the future, hope college works out ok, do keep us updated :-)

[Special_talent123]

Hi Manda, i am so sorry your son has been sectioned. That nearly happened to me tuesday- i was nearly sectioned and sent to a mental hospital - we think i have more than PTSD now, I seem to be having manic depressive episodes.

[Charlie C]

Being honest the best thing for me was being sectioned as it sorted the things that were whirling around my head out. Its not as scary as its portrayed in films although I didn't go to a mainstream psychiatric hospital I found it worthwhile.

[Special_talent123]

I meant wednesday not tuesday

[JeanneA]

Just wanted to say special talent I love you new profile photo :-))

[Special_talent123]

aww thanks jeanneA when i change my profile picture on facebook changes it on here, and its a big massive dolphin

[JeanneA]

Its a lovely dolphin

[Special_talent123]

thanks JeanneA

[Mandapanda]

Hi Special

 

I hope you have settled down now. They would be trying to help you, though I know it probably wouldn't feel like it to you. Look after yourself.

[Special_talent123]

I have been extremely unwell since last wednesday- im showing the bipolar signs but i seeing gp tomorrow shows what mood is doing, and my advocate got meeting on friday bout me having a reassessment so im emailing her my daily mood

[JeanneA]

I hope you get on ok when you see your GP tomorrow do let us know. Thinking of you. :-)

[Special_talent123]

I saw the GP yesterday and she agrees with me, BiPolar, which she is going to refer me to mental health team for a reassessment although hearing back from what my advocate is saying today as she got a meeting with my nurses team leader so im very anxious.

[Charlie C]

They might not change your current diagnoses just add the bipolar to them, thats what they did to me. I thought they'll get rid of my borderline personality disorder and replace it with the bipolar but now I'm diagnosed with both.

[JeanneA]

I'm sure everything will be ok special talent please don't worry yourself too much I'm sure your reassessment will go fine at least you have the diagnosis.

[Special_talent123]

My advocate emailed this- this outcome of a meeting with the team leader about reassessment

 

Hi Special Talent,

The meeting with team leader went well, I really felt that he listened to what you were asking for, he is going to be discussing things with psychiatrist, and there may possible be a Case Conference meeting held in a few weeks with professionals to discuss your case, which I will hopefully be able to attend and then feed back to you.

[trekster]

i had a breakdown in 1998 and have been trying to rebuild my life a day at a time since. ive also come close to further breakdowns a few times in recent years.

 

5 years after my breakdown i passed my a levels. another 7 years later i got a 2.1 bphil in autism.

 

im at another crossroads wondering what to do with my life. my cptsd past is fast catching up with me after a traumatic event in 2010 and another this year.

 

i swear that i have lasted this long due to gfcf diet and cutting down on artificials in my diet.

 

mandapanda could your son have hidden pain?

im also unable to use china bowls and plates due to their weight.

 

alexis

[Mandapanda]

 

i swear that i have lasted this long due to gfcf diet and cutting down on artificials in my diet.

 

mandapanda could your son have hidden pain?

im also unable to use china bowls and plates due to their weight.

 

alexis

 

Hi Alexis

 

I hope my son will one day be able to take his A levels like you.

 

I assume you mean physical pain? How could I find out? He can't distinguish between feeling sick, indigestion, or hunger. I never thought of this, so thank you.

 

His diet is so restricted and limited it would be very difficult to change it, but I will look at what I'm buying to see if I can make any subtle changes.

[trekster]

mandapanda i also hope your son will achieve in life.

 

This part is about sensory issues in autism which would explain the bodily needs being unexpressed. im also unable to distinguish between sick, indigestion or hunger (sometimes you feel sick because you are hungry) and have found a weighted vest can help with that.

 

Would he take painkillers if you tried him on a weeks course of OTC pain meds? It is something that a challenging behaviour speaker suggested on my course. Try the OTC pain meds for a week then try them without as 95% of challenging behaviour is hidden pain in autistics.

 

My pain is expressed in anger and inability to do stuff, my family dont really understand that saying 'ouch' means a joint has come out of place and needs replacing. When i do remember my pain meds (got an application on my phone thanks to sciencegeek) my mood can improve and when im relaxed enough i normally remember my pain meds.

 

It sounds like the sectioning gave your son time to make a 'life plan' even in the short term. Maybe his other brother heading for university has motivated him in a way? My sister (supposedly NT) did A Levels and went to university so in a way being told 'you cant do a levels' and 'you cant do university' made me think, 'wanna bet'. Hitting a hump because this year has been really bad, in 2 days time it will be 1 year since my HMS diagnosis and still no idea what the future holds. i am angry at HMS instead of others but it is often percieved as anger at others.

 

Also being off the foods that were drugging me up (was heading for a breakdown at university so thought, 'nothing to loose going on this regime and doing my literature review on diet and autism' i also have a DipHE) meant i could express pain a bit more conventionally. The fact your son finds china plates heavy has led me to think he could be in pain but that is his way of telling you.