Newbie Saying Hi and Nice to be here

[Charlray]

Hello all.

 

I am a 35 year old female from Exeter in Devon. I was only diagnosed with Mild to Moderate Aspergers Syndrome between 3 and 4 years ago. That said I have always known I am different, just have not know why or how. The diagnosis was paid for privately by my work who did it more to prove I did not have the condition, whch was not the case and now they have to recognise it. I am married to Adrian who is registered blind and living with someone with a disability makes it easier for us both to be more tolerant and accepting of the other person. Adrian has a 3 year old Black Labrador/Retriever cross Guide Dog called Gloria (Glo for short) who is really adorable. I love playing World of Warcraft on the PC, Reading and not so much now Writing too. I used to write poems which varied depending on how I was feeling but were always about things I knew. I also enjoy collecting things and have a large collection on Harry Potter memorabilia as well as various sets of Trading Cards, including Dr Who Battles in Time, Harry Potter (of course) and Match Attax to name a few.

 

I always find socialising difficult but don't have a problem at work with talking to people there. I also don't have a problem talking with people on the phone. I have been working since I was 14 years old (on a work permit back then) and have never been out of work so it is possible for someone with Aspergers to get and hold down a job. It is just a lot of hard work to get to that stage (or at least I found it so).

 

I have never had friends, I was bullied from the first year in my junior school until I left Comp/Senior school and therefore never really learned essential social skills I needed to learn. I never really trusted people either and although I really like school, I really hated the people there for making me feel so bad. I am more gulible than a lot of people and tend to take things literally so I understand I can be "fair game" and strange to others.

 

I would really like to get some proper friends, not the "user friends" that I normally get, that I can talk to in real life over the phone, write to or even, eventually, meet up and socialise (or try to) with.

 

Anyway enough about me. I hope you can tell me about yourselves and if there is anyone who might be willing to be a "friend" to me so I can find out what friendship is really like as having to admit I have never had one and never being able to turn to one when I need to really sucks!!!!

[darkshine]

Hi

[SensitiveSoul]

Hi Charlray, welcome to the forum

[smileyK]

i can relate to you in some similiar ways i have A.S diagnosed alot earlier than you in my early teens! my twin brother is particially deaf and totally blind he wears hearing aids two of them! so we both have 'different SEN's' in this household for sure my parents have always had challenge obstacle in their lives! lol what boring life be if not!

 

XKLX

[robert7111a]

Hi and welcome. You'll find a lot of friends on here.

 

I too was bullied at school and led astray (which caused me to get into serious trouble at one point) and like you, never learned the requisite social skills and therefore never really had any (proper) friends. I was also teased at work during my 20's. Then during my late 20's/early 30's, I was mocked and bullied at work which led me to four years of clinical depression/parasuicide. I never knew I had AS until my 40's.

 

I have always been distrustful of people and got used to my own company and doing things solo. People do still look at me wierdly from time to time but I don't let it bother me any more. I have learnt social skills in order to do my job and get on with people professionally but that's as far as it goes unless I can find a mentor to teach me these things.

 

I have a lovely wife and daughter who are very supportive and tolerant of my quirks and I suspect my daughter might even have some of my traits.

 

I like to think I have a few friends on here and would be happy to chat/share with you.

[trekster]

Welcome and congrats on your diagnosis and marriage. :-)

 

I'm a fan of Magic the Gathering, and whilst at my annual autism retret played a game called Saboteur.

 

If you subscribe to Asperger United http://www.autism.org.uk/aspergerunited

.....and send in your poems (even annonymous ones) they print artwork, poems or other articles from many of us spectrummies. :-) Saw a few Harry Potter movies with my brother and they really scared me in places. My gran is going blind and i do what i can to support her, today we watched a tv program and i read out the subtitles afterwards despite my dyslexia.

 

im into embroidery and stamp collecting also Star Trek lol.

 

i haven't worked except a bit of piecework but my spending habit meant i bought stuff i didn't need (hoarded) which im trying to get rid of. i do quite a bit of volunteering though and run a few social groups in Bristol (cafe, cinema) and Bath (cafe, cinema, pub/outings).

 

PM me for details of a social group for Autistic/asperger folk in Bath that i happen to run :-) your fella is also most welcome to attend.