hi im new

[katieboo]

hi all,my name is kath and im mummy to a 5.5yr old boy who is suspected to be on the autistic spectrum by myself and his teachers,we have started the process and i know we have along way to go,his case has been put before a panel today and im just waiting to hear what will happen next .my son started an iep at the start of this school year and has one on one help in a mainstream school,

my son is very immature for his age,yesterday it was his teddys birthday and we had to do a little party for it.he reffers to his teddies as his babies and believes they are real,hes struggles with writing(unless he can copy) and can only read the odd 3 letter words.hes good at numbers though.

he has very bad temper tantrums and can get very agressive,hes acted this way in school,hitting out,pushing children who are in his way or if he feels they are not standing correctly or sitting 'right' at carpet time,hes thrown sand in childrens faces and pulled a little girls hair through the railings and wouldnt let go,we had to collect him one day as he tryed to cut his nose off with scissors as a 'cool trick'.he wont sit for any length of time during listening time and just fidgets,even peeling wall paper off the classroom wall.

he doesnt make alot of eye contact only briefly if you tell him to.ie he is doing something,ie watching tv or playing you have to physically touch him and say his name for him to listen to you (hearing test shows good hearing) he is fine when hes doing what he wants,try to take him away from that and all hell breaks loose,calling people stupid ,idiot,ugly mummy and shutup,he has a very high pain threshold,when he hurts himself he asks am i cracked or bleeding before he reacts.his sister(only 16mths older) gets very fustrated with him.its a shame,shes clever,well rounded and a loving little girl.my little boy can be tickled and end up in fits of laughter almost like alot younger child.he doesnt have much sypmpathy for others only on rare occasions,he sets up his toys but doesnt play with them,you cant move them as thats were they are suposed to go.he makes alot of loud noises when bashing his toys around he doesnt role play with them.he will use imaginitive play with his sister but usually by doin what she says and if he does sugest something it has to be his way or agen all hell brakes loose which usually ends with him ruining what their playing and banging slamming doors,hitting out etc,

he does seem to behave in public but i feel thats because hes out his comfort zone,he sometimes flaps,walks on tiptoes (not always) and has to avoid cracks on the pavement,he has been known to lick objects,kiss things like stones,sticks.

ive always thought something wasnt quite right ,in reception they tried to put it down to his age(one of the youngest in the class) two days into yr1 they finally told me they think he may have a asd,feel annoyed,guilty,anger ,my every waking minute is spent thinking,researching etc.ive been reading on here and have found it very useful.

does anyone have any thoughts on my little boys behaivour,i could go on and on with the things he says and does but id be here forever lol.he tells some great stories bout his house in the sky and the friends he has there ?? any advice would be greatly apreciated

[245mcl]

Hi Kath I'm new to this myself but have found the other members to have been really helpful, I have a son who is turning 5 in two weeks and who was diagnosed with autism last year, all children are different but I recognise similarities between your son and mine. In school my son has a special cushion he sits on to provide sensory stimulation, as well as a specially designed pencil to help with his writing, he is also allowed a small object to "fiddle" with during listening time, as for his behaviour which can be at times challenging, the school uses rewards ie for completion of a piece of work he will get 10 minutes on the computer as well as a visual activity chart to let him no what is happening next. I use the term "first" and "then" quiet a lot as well as "good choice" "bad choice" cards and I have a timer which I set for 15 minutes to let him know when an activity is coming to an end or when he is playing with his sister and they need to take turns, he still screams and half the time he will throw he object he has been asked to share, but at least now he is attempting to share. I hope some of this was helpful and I hope you hear soon with regards his assessment.

[smileyK]

From what you've explained /described physically (standing on tip -toes sometimes,high pain tolerance,sensory seeking (stimming) issues,obssesive compulsive etc about your little boy sounds like true possibility /likelyhood there glad you both heading in "right direction" in my personal opinion and experience the earlier this is investigated throughly the "better",improved ,brighter opportunities/chances for you and your son especially! Good on you for seeking further research into these issues! Good luck to you both!

[katieboo]

thankyou both to your replies,that sounds like a good idea about the timer.from researching on the net i have started using different things like if hes playing i will say 20 minutes untill we have to go to school,bed etc ,10 minutes 5 minutes etc but i supose if i had a timer that i could set he could visually see the time lessoning rather than me shouting it out,i have made changes such as more simple comands,getting down to his level etc,myself and their father seperated almost 3yrs ago and are divorced but everyone is on board (grandparents too) with all trying to follow the same rules,routines etc so thats good.i have noticed his behaviour in school has improved since he started the iep so maybe alot was due to fustration,my little boy still wets the bed at night (has never had a dry night) so wears pullups for bed on advice from the gp as he reckons its better for his self esteme rather than having the embarrasment of wetting his bed(when we have tryed him in the past he started to not wake me up but go to his drawer ,change his own pj bottoms and lie on top of quilt) even though the little monkey hardly ever gets himself dressed when asked to lol.but i couldnt have him sleeping on a wet bed so went back to the pullups ,hes even had a kidney scan(he had a dilated kidney when in the womb)so we wondered if the two where related but that came back fine.he can dribble a bit during the day and can become a bit smelly but thats getting better.ive just started now to consentrate on the positives and what things he can do rather than what he cant ie hes great with jigsaws and can build lego models exactly as they are on the box or some from memory.school have been great ,if he doesnt something naughty in school they threaten him with loosing playtime as even the threat of going to see the head teacher didnt bother him (he wud enjoy goin to see her) so this seems to be working well.hes left handed and struggles with 'finger spaces' so they have made him a laminated finger to help him which i thinks brilliant.im just annoyed that we first sent his refferal off the begining of october,when the teacher rang the center to enquire where we were up to they said they hadnt recieved it and it all had to be done again this was just before xmas so i feel we could of been a bit futher along now .thankyou again for your replies it helps so much reading these things.

[Soda]

Hi Kath,

My daughter is virtually same age and last year her behaviour in school was very much like your sons. She would completely zone out in carpet time, couldn't sit still on carpet, constantly had to be holding something in her hand, a toy prefably but she would pick up objects at break time like a stone or a leaf and hold them until she went to bed. She really struggled processing instructions and communicating because of her language delay. We have just been diagnosed with autism and actually year 1 is better. Think the more structured approach to the day, rather than the free flow approach in reception suits her much better. She has group and one to one SALT at school. Other things that seem to have helped include she has a visual timetable, sometimes a visual task board . For a while a special sensory cushion thing helped her sit still longer.

Although the process is not a quick one it sounds like school are being helpful. Because my daughter is doing quite well at school action plus even though we have had a diagnosis nothing has changed for her on a day to day basis and we haven't been offered any more support. I guess it means though that we have quicker access to services in the future if she needs one....? All this is new to me too!

Soda

[JeanneA]

Hi I also recognise similarities between your son and mine when he was the same age. I would say your son does have ASD, by have you describe him and what he does. I do hope you get the diagnosis soon, the sooner he's diagnosed the sooner you will receive the help that you both need.

[trekster]

Hello and welcome to the forum.

[katieboo]

hi all, thank you for your replies, soda, at what age did you start the proces with your little girl how long roughly from the start to the diagnosis was it?,the sensory cushion sounds really like that could help.thanks jeanneA and hello trekster thankyou for the welcome.kath