positive_about Report post Posted January 28, 2013 Hi, I'm Tim, and its suspected I have Aspergers, and fighting to get a diagnosis, which is torture but I need to keep fighting - I don't really want the fight, but seems the only way to get anywhere with my psychs. I've always felt different, and plenty of people have said or done things to remind me of it - even today. My main problems have always been social interaction, or lack of I should say, I'm not so bad if people start talking to me - its initiating conversation I really struggle with, I get 'stuck in a loop', thats how it feels anyway. I also struggle to focus on something unless I'm really interested in it - at school my mind always drifted, and trees moving in the wind always seemed more interesting than anything the lesson had to offer. I've always been more interested in things than people, intensely so - when young I was obsessed with lego and meccano, then I got into model railways, and then computers (which I still am). I've recently realised that I need to accept I am geeky/nerdy, and be cool about it - I am what I am. Thats why I used positive_about as my username, I'm trying to be positive about having Aspergers, and who I am generally. There's plenty I've hated about myself, but at 40 its probably time I started making the best of myself, instead of wasting away feeling I don't belong. I'm thinking about setting up my own website to help autistic people share and develop their interests/hobbies/lives in a positive environment. I don't know if its something thats needed, but its something I want to work on. I'm always full of ideas, but I struggle to know whats achievable - so either let them go, get stuck trying to work out how to achieve them, or start and quickly feel out of my depth. I just want to be positive about myself, and having Aspergers (assuming I have), and hope others on the spectrum can Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
matzoball Report post Posted January 28, 2013 Hi Tim, Welcome to the forum, always good to have someone with such a positive outlook on life here Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Willow-Tree Report post Posted January 28, 2013 Hi Tim, I'm Willow I struggle to begin a conversation to but like you say, it's easier if someone else starts it- although I still struggle. I feel like most conversations are 'hi, how are you, good - you?, great thanks'...and then something about the weather! It's great that you want to start a website What sort of thing are you aiming for? Anything is achievable I guess it just depends how good you are with web development - that's what holds me back from doing things; I have to wait for my partner to come home from work and get him to do it for me XD Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
matzoball Report post Posted January 28, 2013 I'm a web developer - if you need any tips Tim give me a shout! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
positive_about Report post Posted January 28, 2013 Thanks Matz/Willow. Willow: Yeah, I have a limited set of 'scripts' to get me by in everyday situations - eg. at the bank, shops, etc., it just never feels enough, and some people smirk/laugh because I dry up, and have to walk away. At 40 it feels pathetic, and I should of learnt by now, but even if I can prepare what to say my brain locks up or it gets jumbled. I've tried at work many times to engage more, but it never came naturally and so I slip back. I'm much better online or txting, I can think about things and take my time - even if its too long. I have learnt enough web-skills to develop websites, work on a couple years ago but struggled to keep them going due to cost (I don't work) and losing focus. I'm not an expert, but I'm resourceful and look up anything I'm lacking. I'm kind of aiming for something where users have a profile to promote themselves and their interests (through photos, videos, blogs, etc), but with a 'social networking' element to (though not like facebook, don't want to go there), more of a 'circle of friends' for support/advice. I dont know about others, but I get stuck in my head too much and need to engage with other people. I've been inspired by a couple of asperger guys who have pushed themselves to engage with others - one does improvised comedy, the other provides talks to businesses about how people with Aspergers can benefit their business. I wish I had their website url's to hand, really positive and inspiring. I want to help others with autism challenge and develop themselves. I'd love to do something offline too, but lack the confidence and social skills, so for now I'll start online. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
positive_about Report post Posted January 28, 2013 I'm a web developer - if you need any tips Tim give me a shout! Thanks Well, I'm better at the back-end stuff than the graphical side of things, so I will be in touch I tend to go for mimimalist designs so my weaknesses aren't exposed too much, but I may need something more stylish this time. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
matzoball Report post Posted January 28, 2013 Well, I will be happy to advise! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Willow-Tree Report post Posted January 28, 2013 Thanks Well, I'm better at the back-end stuff than the graphical side of things, so I will be in touch I tend to go for mimimalist designs so my weaknesses aren't exposed too much, but I may need something more stylish this time. And I'm a graphic designer Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
positive_about Report post Posted January 28, 2013 Blimey, I'm overwhelmed with web support! Well, thats the front-end sorted then I feel an aspie collaboration coming on! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Willow-Tree Report post Posted January 28, 2013 Blimey, I'm overwhelmed with web support! Well, thats the front-end sorted then I feel an aspie collaboration coming on! Hehe - the only thing I have remotely live at the moment is my WillowHope.com site - but it's just a splash page. I designed it all though, including my little monsters XD Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
matzoball Report post Posted January 28, 2013 What platform do you hope to use? Wordpress? Joomla? What kind of functions would you like it to have? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
positive_about Report post Posted January 28, 2013 Hehe - the only thing I have remotely live at the moment is my WillowHope.com site - but it's just a splash page. I designed it all though, including my little monsters XD Wow, groovy Hmm, defo gotta work on getting something live, i'm even more inspired. I've just registered spectrum-dreams.com so far, and got reams of thoughts about how it will look/work, but not much more. I always struggle to get ideas out of my head, but I'm determined to do this. Like the poetry book too, i'll have to get a copy. I dabble in poetry and need to do something with it, but i'll just post some on here for now, and maybe put together a personal website to host my musings. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
positive_about Report post Posted January 28, 2013 What platform do you hope to use? Wordpress? Joomla? What kind of functions would you like it to have? I'm fairly old skool, I use PHP and hand-written HTML, and MySQL, though I do wanna check out Joomla + others. The main function is a profile system where users can create and customise their own personal profile, and upload pics/videos/etc. related to their hobbies/interests/ideas, kind of LinkedIn meets Facebook but just for autistic people - either to help them gain employment, or to just share their personal interests. The secondary function is for a 'mutual support group' so users can encourage and support people into similar things. The whole site will be built around tags, so that uses can explore and link with other users - I'm keen to avoid 'groups' as that narrows things down too much. I want to encourage and raise awareness of the creativity and inspiration of autistic people - enabled, rather than disabled. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Willow-Tree Report post Posted January 28, 2013 I'm fairly old skool, I use PHP and hand-written HTML, and MySQL, though I do wanna check out Joomla + others. The main function is a profile system where users can create and customise their own personal profile, and upload pics/videos/etc. related to their hobbies/interests/ideas, kind of LinkedIn meets Facebook but just for autistic people - either to help them gain employment, or to just share their personal interests. The secondary function is for a 'mutual support group' so users can encourage and support people into similar things. The whole site will be built around tags, so that uses can explore and link with other users - I'm keen to avoid 'groups' as that narrows things down too much. I want to encourage and raise awareness of the creativity and inspiration of autistic people - enabled, rather than disabled. My fiancé has started building things using Symfony - I think that's what my site will be built on You're site idea sounds good - we've been thinking of doing the same kind of a thing for a while but we never got around to it. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
INimz1995 Report post Posted January 28, 2013 Hey I can never talk someone first, they have to talk to me first because I'm really shy and Nervs thats why I never make friends easily. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
matzoball Report post Posted January 28, 2013 Wordpress would do the job if you use php and SQL - it's got a great editor on there and it's free! The only thing that would limit you is your imagination Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
trekster Report post Posted January 29, 2013 Hello and welcome Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
positive_about Report post Posted January 29, 2013 Hey I can never talk someone first, they have to talk to me first because I'm really shy and Nervs thats why I never make friends easily. Its something to work on, I wish I had when I was younger, but doesn't really matter how old you are its always possible to change, or develop better strategies. I buy books when I can, and just bought a social skills book for Aspies - http://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/1843108763/?tag=hydra0b-21&hvadid=9550951509&ref=asc_df_1843108763 but can't say how good it is yet because haven't read much yet. The important thing is not to compare yourself with others, just be yourself and make the best of yourself - friends will come from reaching out to people you feel are similar or who understand you, it takes a lot of work but its worth it. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
positive_about Report post Posted January 29, 2013 Hello and welcome Hi, and thanks Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
positive_about Report post Posted January 29, 2013 My fiancé has started building things using Symfony - I think that's what my site will be built on You're site idea sounds good - we've been thinking of doing the same kind of a thing for a while but we never got around to it. I'll check out Symfony, wasn't aware of that- I've been working on my own framework, but may be best to use something more professional, and complete. Well, I'll defo have to get my site going then - may take me a while to get my ideas out of my head, but i'll start with the basic layout and functionality and let you guys break it, er, I mean make sure it works Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
matzoball Report post Posted January 29, 2013 I'm also a qualified software tester too hehe Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
positive_about Report post Posted January 30, 2013 Cool. I'm under pressure to do things properly then lol. Hmm, I wonder what other talents are hiding away around here... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
JeanneA Report post Posted January 30, 2013 My husband and daughter and web developers, but me, I'm afraid I wouldn't have a clue, but looks like you will be in good hands with matzo with all her knowledge :-) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
positive_about Report post Posted January 31, 2013 JeanneA: I've just gotta remember to seek help when I need it, I get obsessed with trying to do everything myself lol I've started putting things together using stuff I've already been working on, feels good to make progress. I'll be seeking help from non-techies too, once I've got something people can try out, and set up and customise their own profile Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
JeanneA Report post Posted January 31, 2013 Hi Tim, yes if you need help you do have to ask. I am like that though I prefer to do things for myself I hate asking others for advice, so I do know where you are coming from :=) Sounds good what you are doing, I'd be interested in seeing how to customise my profile. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
