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amberzak

Should I continue teaching? Pls help

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Hi

 

I just need a bit of help really.

 

I'm training to be a maths teacher, and on the good days I love it. I really enjoy what I'm doing. But things get stressful very quickly, and my aspergers seems to keep getting in the way.

 

I keep getting told I'm too chatty, but then get told I'm not friendly enough in the staff room. I find it very hard to adapt my lessons at times. I got really stressed the other day because the teacher I was working with wasn't in, so I couldn't use his laptop.

 

I am really struggling. But all I've ever known is either writing or teaching.

 

I'm finding the PGCE very stressful at the moment. I am trying so hard, but I don't seem to be doing very well. I really want to be successful. I do enjoy the good days. I really lack confidence in myself.

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Do people in the staff room know about your AS? Because you would think they of all people would know how to make allowances. But if it's school rather than teaching, could you do one to one work, mentoring or home tutoring?

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I often feel like job I do at present is often pressured /stressful due to swapping of environments down under 2's one minute to next lunchtime being need up other end of over 3's it can be stressful due to several instructions or situations happening altogether as does sensory issues overload and overwhelming but love the job so much I try to over ride the rest but isn't easy! Try stay focused,determined and stay loyal I know I am lucky grateful to work place for being mostly supportive understanding! ;) if you want the dream that much/bad you'll continue to 'chase' it whatever it takes! I walked out of setting before and one biggest regrets I have when look back! (Not good thing to do at all!) XKLX

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Thanks guys.

 

I'm training at the moment, so I have to work full time. When I get a job, I might try and see if I can work part time. 4 days a week or something.

 

The people I work closely with know I have aspergers. My mentor is very very supportive, and is amazing. I just feel really bad because I feel she has to do more for me than she would another trainee, and that puts more pressure on her. I know they have to do reasonable adjustments for me, but I just feel really guilty of it because she is such a lovely person.

 

At my first placement, I was basically told I shouldn't teach if I have aspergers. That kind of upset me, but unfortunately that put the thought in my head (as well as it being really unpleasant) and now I lack so much confidence. So when a lesson goes badly, it feels like the end of the world.

 

I had an amazing last lesson today. One of the kids, a year 7 boy, said as he walked out 'that was a really fun lesson. Thanks miss.' and that made me feel really good.

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Way you should see it is what positive experiences you get out of teaching! Sense of purpose you have feeling needed wanted as part of team! I know does for me! The good feeling is untouchable amazing "high" 'buzz' that makes realise why put yourself through all stress/anxieties makes it worth while pay off! Have keep reminding yourself of this! A child did similiar statement to me at work makes feel great! :) don't let a 'stupid' statement that shouldn't teach because of AS being present prove the 'doubters' wrong show them anything is possible even achieving in your 'dream job' I have 'stuck two fingers up' to the 'doubters' I had college tutor who told me I'd never be nothing no one my only job would amount to 'house keeper' now a lunchtime assistant part of a team! Now remind the tutor of this! Which is also great to prove a point don't let anyone set you back or talk you down -keep pushing forward btw don't feel guilty as putting more time effort in that's how more is coming out!

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Hi amberzak

 

I think the main decision you have to make is do you really WANT to be a teacher? Is it what you really want to do? If it is, then accept the help you are being given and try not to feel guilty about it. I'm not going to pretend that I like people to think that I can't cope or fulfil my duties when I'm in the workplace but tbh, if I could access the help then in future I would, knowing how I have struggled. From the posts you've made before, it sounds like you are a committed hard worker and that you've been willing to put the effort in to be as good a teacher as you can be. Even if at some point in the future you decide to give up teaching, would it not be best to finish your training and get your qualification and THEN decide what direction you take? Keep going. You can do it! Hold onto the great feeling you had today when that little boy said he enjoyed his lesson.

 

Lynda :)

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Hi Amberzak,

 

Teaching is a tough job but it needs the right people, and number one on that list is people who really want to teach - like you. Training to teach is also tough, but once you are through it, it does get easier.

 

Whoever told you or implied that you should not be teaching with AS is likely in contravention of the DDA, as well as showing ignorance of the condition and how it affects different people in different ways. AS in itself is neither a bar nor a barrier to teaching (although the staffroom may never be the easiest of places - lots of teachers don't indulge in staff room politics though, so would never be alone).

 

Try not to be too hard on yourself. It sounds as if you are painfully aware of the ways in which AS may have a negative impact. However, do not forget the positive - teachers with AS are likely to be equitable and fair, aware of the individual differences of pupils (especially those with ASD or traits), use less sarcasm (that most children hate) and be incredibly consistent and reliable. Good NT teachers will have these qualities as well, but what I am trying to say is that AS should not be a bar to success with the right support.

 

I speak from experience - over a decade teaching kids, been in HE teaching big kids for a few more years and still loving it :) PM me if you want to chat.

Edited by l'anima semplicetta

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The question need to ask yourself is do you enjoy it enough to put yourself through this stress and anxiety? Do you feel it worth it or not? If answer YES then you know deep down whether it it 'feels' right and meant to be in your future career?! Just have long hard think even ask outside friends family?! Sounds like get positive outcome feedback! So must be getting lot right! And decision/choice is yours -yours alone! But we have our opinions! Wish all the best whatever you decide is 'right' direction for you!!! XKLX

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Well, all my friends and family are encouraging me to stick with it. They all think that when I actually get a job things will be different. When I'm not training any more.

 

The good days I will say without question that I love it and it is so worth it. I just want to be a really really good teacher, and at the moment i don't feel like I am.

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Are there any courses you could go on apart from your PGCE to improve your ability to teach or your confidence?

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Let's look on the bright side - on the good days you love your job - surely that says a lot. I am sure there are loads of people out there who never feel that way about their work. You are lucky to have the chance to earn your living at something you enjoy, and something that makes such a difference to other people.

 

While you may be finding it tough at the moment, surely as you get more experienced you will have more good days, and fewer bad.

 

Perhaps you should be selective in whose opinion you listen to! What does how you are in the staff room have to do with how good you are at teaching your pupils. If you've got a good mentor then listen to her - she can probably tell much better than you whether you have the potential to be a good teacher.

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It sounds like you doubt and question yourself more than anyone else does - your abilities and what can achieve out of your life whatever that may be or lead you! I think have to remind yourself of what going right and like everyone who know you hold on in there! You sound strong enough to make it - succeed!

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My first thought was: " Who is she doing it for?" I get a feeling from things you've said in this thread and before as well, that actually, you're doing it not just for yourself, but for the kids. I mean, it's people like you who SHOULD be teaching, I think. People who genuinely care and understand children and want to help them. Do you feel like you are SUPPOSED to do this? Do you think it might be the reason you're on this Earth? That, if you think about it, is the only motivation you need to keep going. Everything else is emotional interference and isn't going to be important once you've achieved your goal, which you clearly have the intellect and passion to do.. and then, the world's your oyster as they say! You can choose to use your qualifications and experience in so many different ways. But what it will do, is give you the authority in this world to be the one who makes changes. So often, it's the wrong people for the wrong reasons who get qualified and make those important decisions. I say go for it. Do whatever it takes to keep your mind focused and inspired! And best of luck, because it certainly doesn't sound easy! :)

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