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KKaren

Smoking

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Hi guys my 15 year old son has become obsessed with smoking

 

He's tried the real things through friends so docs advice was to get him an electronic cig

 

Been smoking that for a while now and now wants to try herbal

 

All in all he keeps asking me to buy them for him which I say is illegal and he can smoke at 16 if he really wants to but the health concerns out way the smoking

 

Any similar problems ??? To let him smoke or not??? He's doing my head in with this at the moment any advice would be good.

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You cab only advise as such really to be honest have you tried pointing him direction of health issues that arise from smoking - how bad it is for you!? Maybe pictures may help of health implications where smoking where lead to next?! My nan died of smoking related illnesses which scared me woke me up shook me up! Been put off of ever trying a cigarette passed my lips! Its awful my mum now has same illness as what my nan lost her life over at relatively young age modern of 70 years old! Miss her so much! I don't think warnings on cigarette packening help in anyway in my point of view waste of time! I think more input/money should be focused on patients with smoking related health issues to consent to appearing telling their experiences on advert how cigarette ruins destroys effects lives in reality! Why did this obsession begin? When did it start?

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What the reasoning behind his obsession with smoking must be trigger of some kind? - peer pressure ,calms anxiety/stress down??? Have you asked him at all? Why he started?

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He is 15 and says it calms him down. I think to start it was peer pressure and fitting into the group Now he no longer attends school and is home tutored he says it calms him and keeps the boredom at bay

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smoking. you can't buy ciggies until 18. I would discourage strongly your sons habit on the grounds of his age,the difficulties of breaking a dangerous habit that will cause awful health implications.at 15 its wrong he should be hooked on them so young. Find something else to interest him. thats less of a health risk.

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Maybe your son needs fill his time/routine with 'other activities' hobbies rather than smoke which isn't going to benefit him in anyway! Maybe sit down and explore other possibilities of other activities to occupy his time and release stress /tension/pressure in 'better way'! XKLX

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Your the parent here at 15 you are still responsible for him, and his well being. If you think any poison was harmful to him, you still need to step in and over rule his desires.What will you do if he started to smoke drugs, because it made him feel better, would still standby and let it happen at 15?

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He is 15 and says it calms him down. I think to start it was peer pressure and fitting into the group Now he no longer attends school and is home tutored he says it calms him and keeps the boredom at bay

 

Where is he getting the cigarettes from at such a a young age. I under about using it to calm down because i found that release in them.

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At the minute he isn't smoking the real thing. He was at school supplied by his mates, on the psy advice I got him an electronic cig - which hes used up to now and now he wants to smoke herbal... what I'm saying is hes driving me mad and yes he knows all the health risks as he has researched it but its like water off a ducks back and I know he'll be on the real things as soon as he can buy them himself.

 

As for other things to do he boxes, he has a gym membership, he helps out at an animal santuary so I've tried numerous things to keep him occupied and healthy! But hes his own person and will do his own thing and 3 more years as he keeps telling me he'll be an adult - hopefully it won't be drugs but who knows.

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Much as I hate smoking, I guess the truth is, from what you have said, your son would be smoking if he was still at school.

 

At least he is taking about this with you, and he appears to be fully aware of the consequencies.

 

My suggestion is, you agree to the herbal cigarettes, but the cost of them has to come from his pocket money. You could also insist he goes into the garden to smoke them.

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I am very anti smoking especially after living with my mother for 22 years who was a very heavy smoker. My eldest son used to smoke but thankfully gave up. I nave never had this with Glen and hope I never do. I would seriously discourage your son, I wouldn't even agree to herbal cigarettes but that's just my opinion.

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Oh my gosh. That must be awful for you. As the parent, you must make the decisions, yes, but what a dilema. You must feel hated when you don't let him do it, and loved when you do....but when you let him have it, he's poisoning himself. Difficult. Wouldn't wanna be in your situation! I don't know what I would do. 15 year olds have very strong will and a mind of their own. And you probably can't win based on rational arguments, because it's most probably become an emotional/firey topic....?

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I smoked at 15 and could buy "singles" from the local shop near my school for 10p each. It was certainly a form of release. Personally I don't think you can stop him but at least he and you are talking about it. He's obviously at that age where he wants to try stuff and old enough to make his own choices and understand the health implications. I knew I would get a good hiding from my father had he found out. My mum smoked at the time and I used to nick the odd one without her noticing.

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Thanks guys for your advice ill just have to go with the flow and see if the novelty wears off probably take a few years until then ill try and keep him off the real things and out of trouble!, Not Easy!!

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Do herbal cigarettes contain nicotine?

Is he 'addicted' [as nicotine is very addictive] or is this obsession/ritual driven?

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Smoking is dangerous to our health. I think you can show your 15-year old the graphic photos of what happens or will happen to his body if he smokes. If he's doing it just because he is bored, then you may want to engage him in other activities like sports. He is too young to smoke.

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Well thanks all for ur advice he tried to take an over dose at the weekend because I insisted he couldn't smoke so what now ??

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Can you seek help through your GP for a consultation with a child phsycologists. You need to get tough now and make your Gp listen , your son is having phsycological issues, which do need to be taken serious.The fact that he is on the road to self destruction, tells you urgent help needs to be obtained.

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You may not be able to force him to stop smoking, but you can lay down rules like no smoking in the house, etc., and have consequences if he breaks them. Just be assertive, keep making it clear you don't like him smoking, and that if he is smoking to cope or feel better then there are better ways to achieve that.

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Is he seeing ClinPsych at all? He obviously has anxiety and obessive issues and is vulnerable, as you say, to addictions in general.

 

Sorry to hear about the overdose. Did he really know what he was doing? And if so, again that shows such a high degree of anxiety to come to that decision.

 

It must all be very concerning for you.

 

Get ClinPsych involved, who may refer onto CAHMS, if they are not already involved.

 

Sometimes things do take years. We are working with our son and his OCD obsessions and compulsions and it can drive you round the bend sometimes.

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