pinklaces34 Report post Posted June 20, 2013 I don't know if this is gonna sound silly or if anyone else has to deal with this, but basically I am really struggling, I am 28 years old and have three kids and the problem is I am in this routine of constantly going to my mums house when I should be at home cleaning and just generally getting on doing things grown ups do but the truth is I would rather be reading or on the computer at my mums. I have to come to realise that my mum and my parents house is a security blanket that I keep going back to and its an incredibly unhealthy habit and is definitely driving my husband mental. I just feel like I really struggle with all the demands of being an adult, like when my husband talks to me about work sometimes I just sit there waiting for an oppurtunity to walk awake cause it is stressing me out. I am also really bad at eating a healthy diet and exercising, I try to be good and it lasts for a week at most then I am back to my old faithful routine. There is other stuff as well, I am not formally diagnosed, hoping to look into this soon but after finding out my daughter is probably on the spectrum and doing a lot of research I am almost 99% sure I have aspergers. Any advice would be gratefully received. xx Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
trekster Report post Posted June 20, 2013 ive found reading books about how others have experienced and coped with their autism beneficial. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
pinklaces34 Report post Posted June 21, 2013 Do you have any recommendations as a lot of the ones on Amazon have mixed reviews. I have Aspergirls, Aspergers for dummies, The complete guide to Aspergers syndrome and Born on a blue day. Thanks Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
robert7111a Report post Posted June 24, 2013 Hi pinklaces34 I'm an Aspergers Dad. When I was 28, I still had no idea why I was "different" and had trouble making friends. I think my daughter could be on the spectrum. Like you, I find sitting in front of the computer at the end of the day calming and relaxing. My wife could be stressing out doing household chores and sometimes gets a bit mad, though she is very understanding of my condition. I read "An Aspergers Marriage" and "22 things a woman should know about men with Aspergers" and it's opposite: "22 things a man should know about women with Aspergers" (sorry can't remember authors). Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Mutts Report post Posted June 24, 2013 I struggle with getting things done as seems overwhelming sometimes I tend to break it up as in one task eg housework,banking then a reward of a episode of a fave tv show or 30 mins on net then onto next task I wouldnt reccomend aspergers for dummies not really much deep insight Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
pinklaces34 Report post Posted June 24, 2013 Thanks guys x Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
trekster Report post Posted July 8, 2013 it would ve easier if you mentioned some titles you might wish to re really depends onthen I can let you know whether ive read them or recommend them. it really depends on the subject as im bad at remembering titles. I do like Jessica Kingsley publications books though. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
mattblack_uk Report post Posted July 9, 2013 I ended up married with kids - and I tried, I really did. But just couldn't cope in the end. Couldn't cope with the noise, or the disruptions, and I ended up withdrawing more and more from life until I realised I didn't have one anymore. Spent all night after coming home from work on the computer. I used to hate going home too. Used to look forward to going back to work. Just wasn't meant to be... I ended up getting divorced. Best thing for both of us. I'm now happier, and she is currently engaged to somebody else who can no doubt offer the support that I couldn't. I still see the kids every other weekend and we get on just fine. I think the tipping point for me though was getting the diagnosis of Aspergers... I didn't take to it very well. On a positive note - now that I understand things a lot clearer, things are going much better with my new girlfriend and her kids. Theres been the understanding there from the outset. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
trekster Report post Posted July 12, 2013 Well done for splitting amicably even though the situation must have been difficult for you both. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites