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      Depression, Mental Health and Crisis Support   06/04/2017

      Depression, Mental Health and Crisis Support   Depression and other mental health difficulties are common amongst people on the autistic spectrum and their carers.   People who are affected by general mental health difficulties are encouraged to receive and share information, support and advice with other forum members, though it is important to point out that this exchange of information is generally based on personal experience and opinions, and is not a substitute for professional medical help.   There is a list of sources of mental health support here: <a href="http://www.asd-forum.org.uk/forum/index.php?showtopic=18801" target="_blank">Mental Health Resources link</a>   People may experience a more serious crisis with their mental health and need urgent medical assistance and advice. However well intentioned, this is not an area of support that the forum can or should be attempting to offer and we would urge members who are feeling at risk of self-harm or suicide to contact either their own GP/health centre, or if out of hours contact NHS Direct on 0845 4647 or to call emergency services 999.   We want to reassure members that they have our full support in offering and seeking advice and information on general mental health issues. Members asking for information in order to help a person in their care are seeking to empower both themselves and those they represent, and we would naturally welcome any such dialogue on the forum.   However, any posts which are deemed to contain inference of personal intent to self-harm and/or suicide will be removed from the forum and that person will be contacted via the pm system with advice on where to seek appropriate help.   In addition to the post being removed, if a forum member is deemed to indicate an immediate risk to themselves, and are unable to be contacted via the pm system, the moderating team will take steps to ensure that person's safety. This may involve breaking previous confidentiality agreements and/or contacting the emergency services on that person's behalf.   Sometimes posts referring to self-harm do not indicate an immediate risk, but they may contain material which others find inappropriate or distressing. This type of post will also be removed from the public forum at the moderator's/administrator's discretion, considering the forum user base as a whole.   If any member receives a PM indicating an immediate risk and is not in a position (or does not want) to intervene, they should forward the PM to the moderating team, who will deal with the disclosure in accordance with the above guidelines.   We trust all members will appreciate the reasoning behind these guidelines, and our intention to urge any member struggling with suicidal feelings to seek and receive approproiate support from trained and experienced professional resources.   The forum guidelines have been updated to reflect the above.   Regards,   The mod/admin team
pinklaces34

Dealing with being a grown up as an adult with aspergers

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I don't know if this is gonna sound silly or if anyone else has to deal with this, but basically I am really struggling, I am 28 years old and have three kids and the problem is I am in this routine of constantly going to my mums house when I should be at home cleaning and just generally getting on doing things grown ups do but the truth is I would rather be reading or on the computer at my mums. I have to come to realise that my mum and my parents house is a security blanket that I keep going back to and its an incredibly unhealthy habit and is definitely driving my husband mental. I just feel like I really struggle with all the demands of being an adult, like when my husband talks to me about work sometimes I just sit there waiting for an oppurtunity to walk awake cause it is stressing me out. I am also really bad at eating a healthy diet and exercising, I try to be good and it lasts for a week at most then I am back to my old faithful routine. There is other stuff as well, I am not formally diagnosed, hoping to look into this soon but after finding out my daughter is probably on the spectrum and doing a lot of research I am almost 99% sure I have aspergers. Any advice would be gratefully received.

 

xx

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trekster   

ive found reading books about how others have experienced and coped with their autism beneficial.

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Do you have any recommendations as a lot of the ones on Amazon have mixed reviews. I have Aspergirls, Aspergers for dummies, The complete guide to Aspergers syndrome and Born on a blue day.

Thanks

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Hi pinklaces34

 

I'm an Aspergers Dad. When I was 28, I still had no idea why I was "different" and had trouble making friends. I think my daughter could be on the spectrum.

 

Like you, I find sitting in front of the computer at the end of the day calming and relaxing. My wife could be stressing out doing household chores and sometimes gets a bit mad, though she is very understanding of my condition.

 

I read "An Aspergers Marriage" and "22 things a woman should know about men with Aspergers" and it's opposite: "22 things a man should know about women with Aspergers" (sorry can't remember authors).

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Mutts   

I struggle with getting things done as seems overwhelming sometimes

 

I tend to break it up as in one task eg housework,banking then a reward of a episode of a fave tv show or 30 mins on net then onto next task

 

I wouldnt reccomend aspergers for dummies not really much deep insight

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trekster   

it would ve easier if you mentioned some titles you might wish to re

really depends onthen I can let you know whether ive read them or recommend them.

it really depends on the subject as im bad at remembering titles.

I do like Jessica Kingsley publications books though.

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I ended up married with kids - and I tried, I really did. But just couldn't cope in the end. Couldn't cope with the noise, or the disruptions, and I ended up withdrawing more and more from life until I realised I didn't have one anymore. Spent all night after coming home from work on the computer. I used to hate going home too. Used to look forward to going back to work. Just wasn't meant to be... I ended up getting divorced. Best thing for both of us. I'm now happier, and she is currently engaged to somebody else who can no doubt offer the support that I couldn't. I still see the kids every other weekend and we get on just fine.

 

I think the tipping point for me though was getting the diagnosis of Aspergers... I didn't take to it very well.

 

On a positive note - now that I understand things a lot clearer, things are going much better with my new girlfriend and her kids. Theres been the understanding there from the outset.

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trekster   

Well done for splitting amicably even though the situation must have been difficult for you both.

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