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Hi everyone ! :peace:

My DH and I have a 5 yr old dd. My 5 yr old has been identified through school as having social communication issues & is displaying traits on the spectrum. She is on school action and has an IEP. We have an appointment in October for her to see the Community Consultant Paediatrician. She has had an assessment done via a social communications expert, who has advised that she will need close monitoring.

 

I discovered yesterday via a friend, that the paediatrician that she is due to see, is someone who is very matter of fact and doesn't suffer fools. My friend advises that you need to learn how the 'system' works in order to get what you want, but that you don't know how the system works until you've been through it...if that makes any sense?!

 

I want to help my dd as much as possible and want her to get diagnosed if this is what I suspect it is...ASD. I feel like im juggling with jelly, trying to understand her and help her; trying to 'enjoy' the summer holidays, yet trying to be her best advocate and ensure that she gets what she's entitled to. I am reading everything I can get my hands on, want to do every course around to help me best understand. What can we do to ensure that we don't get fobbed off or that we just get told to 'wait and see'? How do we navigate this minefield???

 

We also have a 3.5 yr old dd who is NT, how do I ensure that she doesn't get sidelined?

I know some of my questions may sound really simplistic and obvious, but I feel useless at times. I recently had a complete hysterectomy and am trying to adjust to that and hormone levels, two children etc etc.

 

Any and all help/advice gladly and gratefully received.

 

Thank you for reading smiley-smile.gif

Caroline

 

 

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hello and welcome to the boards

 

I was diagnosed after compulsory schooling years so I fully understand and accept autistics need to be diagnosed sooner rather than later. I would do what you can to work with the professional that identified difficulties in your child. Also see if there's a parent support group in your area.

 

http://www.autism.org.uk/get-involved/campaign-for-change/learn-more/our-campaigns/past-campaigns/make-school-make-sense.aspx

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Hi Caroline and welcome, I don't think there is any one easy answer to your questions, which are very broad. What I would advise is to write down all your concerns to take along with you to the consultation so that you don't forget anything. Have a piece of paper and pencil handy between now and then and whenever you think of something just jot it down, this way you will be well prepared to discuss all your concerns. It sounds as if the school are already getting things underway. Another invaluable piece of advice at this early stage that I would give would be to make sure you maintain a positive relationship with the school; you really need to work together and try not to get into a situation where you feel you have to battle against them. Easier said than done, I know from experience, but things really will work out better for you and your daughter if you try to keep up good communication and good feeling with the school.

 

Early days. Good luck.

 

~ Mel ~

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... We also have a 3.5 yr old dd who is NT, how do I ensure that she doesn't get sidelined? ...

 

I suggest you have a look into Charlotte Moore's George and Sam: She has one younger (NT) son, and she has exactly the same problem.

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There are books on the subject of 'siblings of children with autism' either aimed at the child themselves or aimed at their parents. In some LA areas support networks for siblings of autistic brothers/sisters exist. A search on either the NAS website (some links are dead just let NAS know) or your local authorities website can come up with parents groups, school clubs (some ASD or disability specific), sibling support groups or even how the systems work (so you know what to expect) when trying to help your children.

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