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      Depression, Mental Health and Crisis Support   06/04/2017

      Depression, Mental Health and Crisis Support   Depression and other mental health difficulties are common amongst people on the autistic spectrum and their carers.   People who are affected by general mental health difficulties are encouraged to receive and share information, support and advice with other forum members, though it is important to point out that this exchange of information is generally based on personal experience and opinions, and is not a substitute for professional medical help.   There is a list of sources of mental health support here: <a href="http://www.asd-forum.org.uk/forum/index.php?showtopic=18801" target="_blank">Mental Health Resources link</a>   People may experience a more serious crisis with their mental health and need urgent medical assistance and advice. However well intentioned, this is not an area of support that the forum can or should be attempting to offer and we would urge members who are feeling at risk of self-harm or suicide to contact either their own GP/health centre, or if out of hours contact NHS Direct on 0845 4647 or to call emergency services 999.   We want to reassure members that they have our full support in offering and seeking advice and information on general mental health issues. Members asking for information in order to help a person in their care are seeking to empower both themselves and those they represent, and we would naturally welcome any such dialogue on the forum.   However, any posts which are deemed to contain inference of personal intent to self-harm and/or suicide will be removed from the forum and that person will be contacted via the pm system with advice on where to seek appropriate help.   In addition to the post being removed, if a forum member is deemed to indicate an immediate risk to themselves, and are unable to be contacted via the pm system, the moderating team will take steps to ensure that person's safety. This may involve breaking previous confidentiality agreements and/or contacting the emergency services on that person's behalf.   Sometimes posts referring to self-harm do not indicate an immediate risk, but they may contain material which others find inappropriate or distressing. This type of post will also be removed from the public forum at the moderator's/administrator's discretion, considering the forum user base as a whole.   If any member receives a PM indicating an immediate risk and is not in a position (or does not want) to intervene, they should forward the PM to the moderating team, who will deal with the disclosure in accordance with the above guidelines.   We trust all members will appreciate the reasoning behind these guidelines, and our intention to urge any member struggling with suicidal feelings to seek and receive approproiate support from trained and experienced professional resources.   The forum guidelines have been updated to reflect the above.   Regards,   The mod/admin team
Dr. G-nome

Hello from Oxfordshire, new here

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Just found this site it's very useful, so I thought I'd come and introduce "us"


We're in Oxfordshire (anyone else around this area?), but recently relocated from the Netherlands. I'm English, OH is Dutch.


My DS, nickname Pootle (8), is the only one with an official Aspergers diagnosis, but I'm utterly convinced that I have Aspergers and strongly suspect my OH of having it too (he admits he has ASD/Asperger tendencies). The jury is out on DD (6), we've been advised by psychiatrists who have watched her interacting with Pootle that she displays some Aspie traits and behaviours, but she seems to be doing OK at school both academically and socially so we're not concerned.


Pootle is a very intelligent lad with a gifted IQ, he knows and understands to some extent, about his Aspergers and we've always tried to make it into a positive thing. People that make the effort to know him describe him as sensitive and a lovely child, but he's often judged on first impressions, which are sometimes not very positive if he is stimming, or having a meltdown :(. He knows that his brain works in different ways than most NT's and that he can use that to his advantage in life. It breaks my heart when he tells me that it is so busy and noisy in his head the whole time, I get this too and after a completely awful last year I'm currently getting into meditation/mindfulness with the hope of trying Pootle with it if it helps me).


Unfortunately Pootle struggles at school, he desperately wants friends, but finds it very hard. His year group are very good with him (girls especially) and seem to make allowances for his Aspergers, but other kids don't understand his behaviours (stimming, lack of social cues etc) and he gets teased and bullied, which usually lands him in a heap of trouble by the way he reacts to it . His last teacher had an excellent rapport with him, and despite the school dragging its heels, his teacher took his own initiative and made some headway. The school SENco is busy with Pootle and an autistic services co ordinator has come in several times and offered some tips, which Pootle found mainly insulting ("babyish" cards to hand to teachers telling them he was about to have a meltdown and needed to be excused). I'm still busy trying to get he best help for him.


If Pootle could he would escape into Minecraft, and similar games 24/7 on his ipad, in fact it's a bit of a problem, and seems to lead to many meltdowns. Meltdowns can be a big problem, I am never sure how best to help him, and he can be quite physical and cause pain (he's very tall and quite strong for his age and has floored me a couple times)


Pootle has quite a few issues with sensory overloads, as well as labels etc - he can't cope with situations like the lunch hall and he finds a busy classroom quite challenging too. In additional he has poor motor skills, which makes sports hard (boy can he run though!), and sleep issues (requires very little sleep/has difficulty dropping off).


Hoping to be able to get some good info here, and help others


Dr. G-nome

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Hello Dr. G-nome!


Your topic is very interesting :D


Personally, I was diagnosed with Asperger's Syndrome (AS) at 7 by a clinical psychiatrist and am now 29. First of all, do you think you could tell me what "OH", "DS" and "DD" stand for? I was just interested. Just to let you know, they do not allow the submission of surnames on this forum, so you will need to miss them out.


To be honest, my life is far from simple nowadays. I often struggle to get to the bottom of mysteries I can feel in my heart and on my conscience, but can hardly work out. I usually only work them out with hindsight, with lots of nasty smog surrounding me during the actual process. In addition, I am struggling to get onto the employment ladder at the moment and still have some unfinished business on a foundation degree course on which I have also been struggling over the past two years.


The support I received for my special needs at school was only minimal :crying: AS was almost unheard of when I was originally diagnosed and a thorough analysis and assessment found that the best school available for me at the time was a boarding school that was purpose-run primarily for emotionally-disturbed children and youths. The support available for Aspies at that school was very limited and I was basically growing up with the wrong people in the wrong environments. The key advantage of that school was that there were qualified speech and language therapists you simply could not then expect to find in mainstream schools. Even so, this meant that my special needs were only partially addressed in all the 7½ long years I was consistently there. Unsurprisingly, I have since developed depression, which became severe, lessened and soared again :crying: Despite the extraordinary academic progress I have managed to make since leaving school at 16, I am often inclined to remind myself that there is no room for complacency and that I still have a long way to go before I can reach my prime lifetime achievement. In addition, I am still living at home with my parents with no clear prospects of flying the nest at last. Nevertheless, I certainly do believe that these potential hard-won achievements are possible over the long term. What I am implying is that I can never leave them to chance or take them for granted, come what may. This is why I often strive on my personal and social development (and sometimes go to excessive lengths in doing so).


It would be really nice to hear from you some time. You can send me a private message, if you prefer it, and use whatever language you feel comfortable with.


Kind regards,


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Hi Dr. G-nome,


I live in France, so am not really sure of the system in UK. But I do have a 14 y.o Aspie son. A lot of the things you say were the same for him. Maybe because we are English living here, he is a bit exotic, so some of his 'quirks' are maybe put down to that. He has mainly female friends too - and also hates sports - his teachers have made some allowances - like when they had to go swimming, she let him have a private cubicle to change.


When he was at primary school, he came home for lunch most of the time - and had a real problem with the canteen when he went to senior school - so I have had to adapt my work schedule to pick him up as much as I could. When I couldn't, one of his teachers let him take sandwiches and a book and sit in an empty classroom. We found this helped with his meltdowns, as he was getting some alone time. Last week he started at equiv of six form college, which is further away, but the dept of handicapped people have agreed to pay for a taxi for him to return home at lunchtime, when possible - (it works out 3 times per week).


He has always had problems sleeping too - I know it is not very favoured here, but he is taking Risperdal, but only a tiny amount - we found this is just enough to keep him calm - we did try and stop it earlier this year, and he started getting aggressive again - I also find he sleeps better with it. I know this doesn't work for everyone. Maybe a better option is homeopathy - when he is really stressed,(like for the 2 weeks before he started his new school) I give him a medicine for minor problems sleeping - it has camomile and things in it.


We also have the computer issue - in the school holidays there were days when he was on it from 8am - 11pm - I do drag him out with me to walk the dog, and make him have little breaks - but a lot of his NS friends seem to be on all day too. But he is not allowed to take his laptop to his room, so if he wants to go there, he can just read or something, otherwise I know he'd never come out.


Unfortunately, with adolescence, comes more attitude - sometimes I get the "I'm the genius round here, so I know best!!" speech from him - so I have to stand my ground. But in a lot of ways, he does see it as a positive thing at the moment. Although he does get frustrated at all the stupidity in the world! Though now he is at lycee, he is in a 'serious class', with more serious students, and is loving it.


I'm not sure if any of this helps, but it hopefully shows that things can progress. We had a few bad years before his diagnosis (age 11) - And I am not sure if I am not a bit Aspie too - I do go to an AS support group, and when they talk about girls with AS, I can see a lot of things in me. (He refuses to come however) -


Anyway, good luck. Diane

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First of all, do you think you could tell me what "OH", "DS" and "DD" stand for?



OH = other half

DS = darling son

DD = darling daughter

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im from Bristol way but I've heard good things about 'autism oxford'.




There was a talk by Paul Issacs recently and it was amazing to hear.

He was explaining about his sensory issues.

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