negatives in to positives

[lynyona]

Just want to put something out there to see who can relate to this. I have just got a job as a Support worker at a Specialist college but to support in residential accommodation with students with varying ASD. We have been in to the college training this week and have met some of the students been told about some students some with Downs Syndrome or severe Learning Disabilities . While I wont go in to Kieran only briefly to see where I am coming from . He wasn't diagnosed until nearly 18 years old so missed out on all the help that would have been there sooner he is now 27 soon 28 with only our parental support .I went into this with good intentions to see how Kieran struggles and to maybe learn something while doing something worthwhile .I suddenly realised that maybe I am not emotionally ready for something like this as I will not be able to detach myself from it .I see these pupil ages from 16 to 23 being tutored in things like learning life skills and being independent IT serving in the student canteen which is brilliant and the slightest thing they achieve is truly an achievement they go to lessons socialise in the common room with each other and it makes me sad just watching them do these things which Kieran could have been maybe doing if id not just plodded along without making the noises and challenging and I sometimes feel that I have failed him as a parent.. which I shouldn't he is cared for looked after and provide for.. but is that just because I am now comparing the students I see to what I see and Kieran and what could have maybe been .I spoke with another lady on the training about it and she is a firm believer that what will be will be so he may never have progressed the way these students have, I will never know..Don't get me wrong I am focusing on the positive and going to go ahead and stick with it but if its to much for me I will have to walk away . If kierans had a bad day which isn't often how will I feel if I come home and have had a bad day at work and as I t looks like my husband will be a stay at home husband while I work will I be strong enough?

[JeanneA]

Hi, I think you are the only one that can answer this. I personally couldn't go into anything like that after looking after my son for 17 years, but everyone is different. I think being a support worker is a fantastic job I admire anyone who does this. Please let us know what you decide to do, and I want to wish you all the best :-)