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Beldina

What can I do for my 19 year old daughter with Aspergers

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My daughter is a high functioning 19 year old.

She had a complete breakdown at 13 and dropped out of school, she was diagnosed over the next couple of years with Aspergers, anxiety, depression and OCD.

We have had to fight all the way along to get any kind of help, most of it has been lacking and when you do seem to get help they pull the service.

She only goes out with me, her mum, we go to the pub a couple of times a week and finds it easy to socialise with older people, apart from this, she is spending between 16 and 20 hours per day in bed and is extremely depressed. She has no friends. Any ideas on how I can help her please.

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Hello

 

Your story sounds similar to mine.

 

My son is now 16 nearly 17 and had a very bad year last year.The worst one. He is also like your daughter and would spend all his days up in his room. He has been diagnosed with Aspergers. I went and did this along the private route because the wait would have been to long otherwise and i needed help quickly.

 

My son does not find it easy to socialise either but wanted to tell you what has really helped.

 

I have just a couple of months ago applied for and got his first EHC plan. I was very thorough with the paperwork and had help from Core Assets but I got the assessment straight away and then the plan also with no problems at all.

 

This plan has enabled him to go and do a Supported Internship. He is so enjoying this. The particular one he does is run from a college but is actually in a work place 100% of the time. He is even earning himself £30 a day tips which he is so happy about.

 

He is now a changed boy due to this course. This course can only be accessed if you have a EHC Plan.

 

If you want to PM me I can give you some more info.

 

Dont know if this is an idea for your daughter but it has really worked well for my son and he making friendships on the course.

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Hi,

thanks for your reply, I did go through the process of applying for a statement for my daughter, but was rejected, so not sure if I can re-apply but I will look into it. Everything seems such a battle, I think a structured work placement would be perfect for her.

Thanks again

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Poor, poor girl. I know exactly how she feels for I suffered in that way in my teens, and have suffered on and off ever since. Idon't know how I'd have managed without my parents' support. I was only diagnosed after they died a few years ago - in the hope that I'd receive the support that I need.

 

We have had to fight all the way along to get any kind of help, most of it has been lacking and when you do seem to get help they pull the service.

 

Same here exactly. It's all making my very ill and more and more confused. I've not seen my support worker, who I'd only just acquired for six months now, and things are spiralling out of control.

 

She only goes out with me, her mum, we go to the pub a couple of times a week and finds it easy to socialise with older people, apart from this, she is spending between 16 and 20 hours per day in bed and is extremely depressed. She has no friends.

 

Me again - except that I spent most of my time feeling depressed and useless in a chair. I got on better with older people at her age, now it's younger people. This is quite usual, especially for female-type AS. I had no friends either, and for years my mother was my only friend. I now have a close friend half my age (with Asperger's herself) and we get on very well and understand each other's oddities. So things can get better. It's hard work though.

 

My only advice is to keep on supporting her, for she needs you so much, and not to give up fighting for the help she needs. Very difficult, I know...

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You have 666 posts, Mihaela. Not a lucky number! :)

 

Anyway, I too have OCD, major anxiety and also a diagnosis of PDD-NOS. I went to a cash-point today, but I was very anxious. I've had this anxiety problem for a long time. Now I have no support. But who needs them? They've let me down. I'm not saying they are all like this. Some do a better job. Some don't do it other than for the experience and the money.

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I have Aspergers. Last year when I was 42 I got my diagnosis. It was such a shock. I knew that there was something not right. My mental health got worse. My hobbies of sewing, embroidery, card making and colouring have given me a purpose.

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My mental health has become worse too, after a very late diagnosis. I only sought the diagnosis in order to get support. It's not happening and so my health deteriorates. I seem caught in an endless struggle to be heard - screaming into the void.

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