Adults and Aspergers and growing up and regressing

[Jonny_Azrim]

Hello my name is Jonny Azrim i am new here I just joined.

I would like some opinions on this. and if everyone can answer as much of the poll as they feel comfortable answering i think it would help me with trying to find out something about myself the problem is i'm not sure what i'm looking for exactly.

I am a 7 year old +/- 1 year trapped in a 30 year old adults body at least that is how I feel.

I play all day on neopets and drawing drawings and coloring the drawed drawings in and watching disney films and cartoons and bits of discovery channel I am going to build a fort for pooh he is my teddy he goes every wear with me and keeps me safe and i am going to build a fort for buzz since i have buzz lightyear pajamas. I use my laptop as a night light and I always have will probably keep doing it till i get moved in to the supported living place that they are trying to find me  then i will be able to get a set of woody bedsheets as well as a night light awesome. I use regression for copping with difficult situations and stressful situations, when I regress i am more like a 3 year old then a big grown up 7 year old but at the moment my IBS is playing up so I am having to wear nappies 24/7 at the moment, its better then having a fit and peeing in my buzz lightyear pants, in any case i find nappies help me manage stress and help me cope and give me a feeling of security and a sensory input.

Managing my stress levels is essential for me as my fits are triggered by stress.

Growing up I was abused and bullied and taken advantage of and never new my real mommy the mother I have is my adopted mother she adopted me from a girl after she was raped by the so called father daddy was the abusive one mommy just did not know how to help me or how to understand my problems but she was very over protective of me and very manipulative.

If anyone has herd of the following 2 conditions please let me know

I Feel Like A Child Syndrome

Peter Pan Syndrome

I ask this because I fit perfectly in to the criteria for both of these conditions the old family doctor labeled me a hypochondriac because i asked a complex question at age 5 since then I can not go to a doctor and give my opinion of what is wrong with me with out that label being on my medical record so natural no doctor will believe me if i go to a doctor and say I need dioralyte or I am allergic to dairy lactose, nuts, gluten, casein, wheat, barley, fructose and coco. If I had a doctor believe me I would not be sitting in a pookie nappy waiting for the next pookie to escape in to my nappy merely 5 minutes apart. But with so many things I am allergic to and some I can not even remember the names of I would rather be in a nappy messing myself then interrupting playtime.

Besides no one has proved that the potty monster is not real and it only took the toilet bowel to fall over in my mid 20s for me to start believing that again.

It took till I was in my mid 20s before I felt like a teenager and even at the age of 26 I only felt I was 14.

I am unable to work because of the combination of Dyscalculia, Epilepsy and Aspergers, but worse after 7 years of trying to get a basic maths qualification I only went from entry level 3 up to entry level 2 (special needs grades). In GCSES I was predicted an F in maths, I did not have any clue what the questions ment when the teacher gave me the paper or what the teacher was trying to teach in maths class. I paid attention but could not understand the most basic things, I could not read a clock till I was in my mid 20s and i still have no concept of the passage of time. 

I guessed my way through the maths paper in the GCSES as I felt I had to fill it in and I got an E.

Every course at university and nearly every course at college requires a C or above in maths and that said I failed education. By the time I realised the truth I was 28 by the time I accepted it I was 30.

I just gave up.

Then mommy went in to hospital her dementia got worse and I started regressing at a rate with more then anything else feels natural and comfortable to me but impaired by every other bit of life in the universe.

It was just before I turned 3 that daddy started being abusive when I go to a regressed state I see myself as just turning 3 and having my first ever birthday party.

Yep I never had a birthday party or christmas party when growing up or any friends..

So as much as I can explain I have right here.

I hope this gives some context to such a long poll.

if you have any questions please ask.