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Paula

Can't take it he needs to go

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He's 25 six foot 1 and 17 stone I'm now 50 husbands 56 I can't take anymore of his, aggression and total unreasonable behaviour his holloring shouting slamming doors stealing out of my purse trashing our bedroom I'm sick of it all he's got to go, I'm ringing social services last year I called but was talked into not persueing supported living due to him being better of at home blah blah yes he's better of me and my husband aren't I want my life Back I can't take no more of this sh*t. He's barricaded in his room thank god. 

I feel guilty but I'll get over it. 

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Spoken to adult social care they'll make the referral for a care assessment and start the ball rolling towards him living away from home. 

I'm just so drained with it all can't believe I've spent 25 years dealing with this seams like yesterday I first posted on this forum, never imagined it would reach this stage. 

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They've rung me back apparantkt I've to be referred to the enabling team first to see what we can do to help him become more independent. 

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That was quick, they've rung me lovely lady had a nice talk. Things have settled again now but we do need to put things in place. She's suggested that I get him formally diagnosed with a learning disability so I've rung my gp they ring me for a telephone consultation in 2 weeks, she says we could do with knowing if his behaviours are down to the autism alone or if there's also a learning disability along side. The lady who rang is going to speak to me next week once she's investigated a few things. 

It was so nice to let it out all my worries over his future as I'm getting older you just become aware of your mortality and the what's going to happen to him. 

I love him, he's our son I feel so guilty that at times I could scream and run away that I could boot him out just to be free of it to be normal again.. But I'm human and some days are bad days. 

Feeling more positive. 

He's away for 2 days with the mencap. So I'm able to re charge.

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Can Mencap help you to get him diagnosed with a learning disability?

Really hope you get the help he needs to move out. Can't a care provider that supports him in the home at first just try and be aware he could have an additional learning disability?

If it helps I had a care agency that helped me to go out and get food to cook for me and granny. Later that progressed to me moving out. 10 years later I temporarily moved back to mums for 15months then moved out again. 3 years ago I moved into my current home. It's not perfect but the care agency I currently have help me with a multitude of things.

 

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