Lisajb Report post Posted September 8, 2004 I will be wearing the same costume I wore at my New Years Eve murder mystery party (snigger snigger) There, I was The Tart, so tonight I will be resplendent in: A gel-filled bra (need all the help I can get in that department!) A low cut top (assisted heaving bosom spilling out) Hot pants ("you got your hot pants on you got your a*** right out" from Misfit (no laughing now!) by Amy Studt Fishnet tights (bit cold in Dec/Jan but OK now, still warm High heeled shoes to cripple me feet (and aid with falling over drunk later on!!! I'm sure I'll look wonderful to anyone whose wearing their beer goggles!!! Lisa Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Kris Report post Posted September 8, 2004 Its partytime!! So grab yourself a drink But for those of you that are driving, make sure you stick to soft drinks cos you dont want to be stopped by the Are you all wearing a silly paper hat? We expect the others will be here soon, we think they are still getting ready! A photographer will be wandering around in an attempt you capture you all in embarrassing positions which you can all blame on the drink in the morning! When we've had a few more to drink somebody is bound to attempt a mexican wave We suspect that some will be more excited than others So, grab a drink, a hobnob and find yourselves a table Jester and Baddad will no doubt end up drunk in a corner somewhere and of course will have overdone it totally The buffet will be available from 9pm and the band are just warming up Keep an eye out for the BANMAN - He may be in disguise!! Here's to the forum!! Happy 1st Birthday Kris & Elefan Forum (and Party) Hosts p.s. The balloons took us ages to blow up!! :balloon: Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
niki Report post Posted September 8, 2004 yey! party time! ( have come dressed as a sane parent!) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Lisajb Report post Posted September 8, 2004 At said Murder mystery party (see previous post) hubby went as Sheikh Duluvmee, wearing a couple of white sheets and a teatowel on his head. He was spotted by a couple of neighbours going out to the bin - what must they have thought! Lisa Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Kris Report post Posted September 8, 2004 yey! party time! ( have come dressed as a sane parent!) Theres no such thing!!!! Good costume Have a drink, you'll find the wine over ther...... "Oi Jester, bring that bottle back!" Kris Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Lisajb Report post Posted September 8, 2004 wot u trying to say Kris? hic hic hic Lisa Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Kris Report post Posted September 8, 2004 wot u trying to say Kris? hic hic hic Lisa Ermmmm, nothing <HIC> Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Jester Report post Posted September 8, 2004 Inside the, frankly, rather humid interior of the large cake within which The Jester has been trapped for some days, he is straining his Superhero powers to hear the many voices outside... Ahh yes...5 4 3 2 1 IT'S EIGHT O'CLOCK....Happy Birthday With no more ado The Jester bursts throught the novelty bosoms atop the confection hoping to wow the assembled throng (or is that the assembled thongs? ) with his 'Party Outfit'. A leopardskin posing pouch, Jester hat and surgical knee supports plus Hush- Puppies of course (for BRW)! Alas..having read about some poseur chaps called 'the Chippendales', he has foolishly doused himself in a light coating of baby oil. Five days in a cake has not been kind. The assembled guests scarcely recognise the apparition that emerges (like something from the film 'Alien') out of their cake. A figure with crumbs, currants and bits of lint attached to his oily form yells "SURPRISE!!!" before an over-oiled Hush-Puppy makes contact with a 'gracious' doilly (Female Inquisitor prop) and The Jester crashes to the ground amidst much screaming, thrashing limbs and a single rather fixed and icy bleak smile from his wife. Just another normal party for me then! Happy Birthday all...now, someone give me a beer! Jester Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Kris Report post Posted September 8, 2004 Jester >> What an entrance!!! Have a beer mate Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Helen Report post Posted September 8, 2004 Kris, what are you like!!!!!!!!!!!!! Well done on the smilies, they are brilliant!!!!! I've managed to make it to the batcave in my poorly state - if you haven't already noticed I'm in bandages at the moment - I've come as a MUMMY!!! Original or what??? Mummy - Mammy, get it? Helen Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Kris Report post Posted September 8, 2004 Original or what??? Mummy - Mammy, get it? We getttit - And so will you if you keep making jokes like that Welcome to the Party Helen Kris Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Lisajb Report post Posted September 8, 2004 Is the beer bottles/cans or have you got a KEG? If so, can I be positioned just under the tap thingy, then I won't have to bother peeps asking for another drinkie? Lisa Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
bid Report post Posted September 8, 2004 Amid the furore of The Jester's entrance, no one notices the Female Inquisitor at first... But suddenly the combined shrieks of BanMan, Helen & Helen plc, Lisa and Delete Woman cause assorted guests to turn round. There is a stunned silence. Into the BatCave strides the Female Inquisitor in her scariest Super Dudette outfit yet... She is modelling 'The Margaret Thatcher Look-i-likey'...complete with Pussy-cat Bow of Terror, Hair Helmet and The Handbag of Doom!!!! Lets see the LEA official who dares stand against this! HAPPY BIRTHDAY SUPER DUDES, SPECTRUM DUDES AND THE DUDIEST PEEPS EVER!!! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Elefan Report post Posted September 8, 2004 Mirror mirror on the wall,......Oh Mirror, Tell me who is the fairest of them all? It is an easy choice to make,...but she is not here,.... Mirror, mirror,....but pray tell me who this person is that lights up the land, if it is not me? The fairest of them all can be found in the,...BATCAVE,.....TONIGHT!!!! HUEY,....BLEURGHHHH,....AAAARRRGHHHHH,....COUGH,....SPLUTTER Delete Woman enters tha cave for the second time this evening,......long after FI's dramatic entrance! The stop playing,.... Jester and Baddad stop ,.... DW scans the room,.... One by one,....the cave cretins ,... DW 's in acknowledgement,.... If only they knew her plan to have the party ruined,...and the 'fairest of them all' reduced to rags and a life time of cave cleaning!! For outside there are many, many, many,... :police: :police: :police: :police: ,...all 444 of them, just waiting for her signal, the !!! DW purses her lips together and is just about to whistle,.... ,...BRW (minus her glasses and having had 'one too many') mistakes DW for 'long lost love' Raymond and assumes the puckered lips are an invitation for Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
baddad Report post Posted September 8, 2004 [i walk in to the room. Immediately the cry rings out]: IT'S CAPTAIN COMMANDO, IT'S CAPTAIN COMMANDO! lOOK EVERYBODY, IT'S CAPTAIN COMMANDO!! [it's so embarrassing... Amost wish I hadn't shouted it now...] HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YIPPPPPPPPPEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Kris, Elefan; the place looks amazing; the band, the ballooons etc. You've obviously been hard at it (I'll lweave the obvious double entendre for those less restrained than myself!) Thankyou, and well done. Jester - what an entrance! A round of applause... I've heard you like a warm hand on your entrance (f'nar f'nar, Yak Yak!) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Kris Report post Posted September 8, 2004 IT'S CAPTAIN COMMANDO, IT'S CAPTAIN COMMANDO! lOOK EVERYBODY, IT'S CAPTAIN COMMANDO!! Oh no, theres always one!!!! Somebody stick a bottle in his hand quick Welcome Baddad, nice to see(?) you Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
baddad Report post Posted September 8, 2004 Well Ben's tucked up in bed with a suitable video (Texas Chainsaw Massacre - that should keep the beggar quiet!), and I'm all set with my wine beside me (just the one box tonight, I think, school run tomorrow... One day we'll leave on time and be able to walk! and I'm in the mood to Partay... Been polishing up my chat up lines... What's Brazil famous for? Coffee Your place or mine? Oh no, last time she said 'nuts'... perhaps I'll give that one a miss... Hi honey, where've you been all my life? ... No, too obvious. Stick with the tried and trusted; "hereya love here's 20p" What's that for? Phone your mum and tell her you won't be home tonight... Yeah, that sounds suave and sophisticated... Wonder why it never works? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Kris Report post Posted September 8, 2004 For outside there are many, many, many,... ,...all 444 of them, just waiting for her signal, the !!! Ah, a raid, well BANMAN will be pleased anyway And I daresay a couple of the superheros would enjoy being frisked! (Jester, get to the back of the queue and dont push in again!) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
baddad Report post Posted September 8, 2004 Hi Auriel - glad you made it. When's that book coming out? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
morgi Report post Posted September 8, 2004 happy Birthday Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Lisajb Report post Posted September 8, 2004 Careful Bad, be very careful Otherwise it will be (adopts Seven of Nine borg type voice) "Remove your hand or I will remove your arm" Lisa Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Kris Report post Posted September 8, 2004 happy Birthday Thanks Morgi, welcome to the party. Theres plenty of food and drink (Dont you just love the virtual world) and the band is quite good Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
morgi Report post Posted September 8, 2004 I don't want to complain but I'd feel a lot more comfortable here if you could turn off the Cheeky Girls and put a bit of Neil Young On....More cider anyone ! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
baddad Report post Posted September 8, 2004 ARE YOU SITTING COMFORTABLY? THEN I?LL BEGIN? MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! Part 1 : THE HORROR COMMENCES? Befuddled and bewildered, Captain Commando struggles back to consciousness. Fragmented recollections of his prior movements swim inside his head; the soggy shorts, the long fall into darkness, his strange conversation with �The Jester�, and his search for fresh attire in the room marked �wardrobe�. �Could any of this be real?� he wondered, then answered his own question with a wider perusal of his immediate surroundings?Definitely cave like? His eyes took in the large steel drum labelled �Blue Rinse� that lay on the floor beside him, registering simultaneously the cranium-sized dent in its side and the two halves of the broken shelf that had finally given up the ghost. The Captain had been directly underneath, adjusting the waistband (outward, predictably) on his newly acquired outfit. �M y. G o d !� he muttered to himself, with the staggered delivery of a true super hero, �J u s t . H o w. L o n g. H a v e. I. B e e n. U n c o n s c i o u s. ?� Making his way back to his new friend?s lair, the Captain suffers a further shock when he espies the figure sitting huddled over Jester?s computer. It?s the same pipe, the same (unmentionable) tobacco from the smell of it, but the man sucking on the foul stem is changed beyond all recognition? A tall, sophisticated, caddish looking sort of fellow, with a gap between his front teeth that could accommodate the proverbial lucky penny sideways on. �Dick Dastardly, I presume�, ventures Captain Commando, almost inducing a heart attack in the huddled figure who, engrossed in his work, has failed to register CC?s entrance. �Urrrrrggggggghhhhhh!�, the figure screams, clutching at his chest dramatically, �Don?t ever do that again, you blithering idiot. You nearly finished me off?Hold on, weren?t you here some time ago? Late June, if memory serves correctly?� �You know me?� �Absolutely, old boy, never forget a face, we spoke together in this very ? Ahhh, I see, I?d almost forgotten. Another strange side effect of the Cave gasses?tissue transformations at a sub atomic level? I am, of course, the Jester, but changed dramatically from the man you met here some two months ago. An unpredictable phenomenon ? poor ASM woman has developed a very lurid and strange (though illuminating) condition. It?s not all bad, though, you should see what happened to the Caped Confuser; Hubba Hubba Hubba!!? My God, man, what on earth are you wearing?�? �Erm, it?s all I could find� the Captain offered, but even as he said it he realised the error he had made? With so few resources available, the captain had plumped for the outfit he?d thought would have the most slimming effect ? a one piece spandex body suit (unfortunately pink) as worn by many seventies Rock outfit front men. The initial effect had been slimming; the elastic properties of the garment acting as a sort of all over corset, but even the short walk from wardrobe had induced the effect known as ?Northern shift?. Held briefly betwixt gravity and upward pressure, the Captains ?less solid? areas had eventually succumbed, and risen, like over yeasted bread, to escape wherever the opportunity presented itself; a mushroom effect culminating in an overspill at the armholes and chest region? �You look like a burst sausage! Get it off immediately before I?m sick! You can have some of my old things, in the closet yonder? Here, here?s some swarfega and a shoe horn ? I think you might need them -?� The Jesters rant stops in mid flight as he espies the twin bulges in the lower regions of CC?s outfit? �My god, man, they are unfeasibly large, aren?t they? Do they hurt at all? Do they function properly???Prize-winners, I?d imagine? Used to compete myself at one point, at a local level of course. Gave it up following a nasty incident when a jealous rival mixed cayenne pepper into my emollient? Became rather disillusioned after that; the Knobbly Knees circus may look glamorous, but at competition level it?s nothing but a meat market.� �I?ve never competed actually, or even shown ? always thought they lacked a certain je ne sais que, but I didn?t know what it was�. �Well you?re wrong, sir, they?re magnificent. Now, sorry for my little outburst but you did rather startle me. Off you go and find some clothes? We?ve got a party to attend tonight�? �A party, a party�, cried CC excitedly. �Yes, my friend, a party; the like of which you?ve never imagined in your wildest dreams�? TO BE CONTINUED?? ? (unless you very quickly wire me some money) Mwahahhahhahhahhahah (again)?.. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
CarolJ Report post Posted September 8, 2004 Sorry I am late folks - ASM falls headfirst into the Batcave, party already underway, hiccup! Too much wine already - need some hob nobs to soak up the alcholhol! Wassup? have I missed anything? The strains of "Happy Birthday ...." are reverbarating off the walls of the Batcave. Please dont let BRW blow the candles out. We need to eat that brithday cake! ASM wipes a nostalgic tear away, at the sight of the assembled motely crew of superdudes and dudetes what a gathering. Glee , the party is in full swing. ASM strikes a pose and begins the "bump" her party piece (move over Mick Jagger impression!) - poor Jester is catapaulted through the assembled revellers (like human skittles) not unlike moses and the parting of the waves - straight into the arms of the predatory BRW. Unaware of the chaos ASM continues obvilivously to strutt her stuff and bump assembled superfolk with her bodacious hips! A few broken bones and bruises could be the end result of the nights revelling! Next up the hokey cokey! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Kris Report post Posted September 8, 2004 I don't want to complain but I'd feel a lot more comfortable here if you could turn off the Cheeky Girls and put a bit of Neil Young On....More cider anyone ! Hmmm, fair point - I'll have a word with the band. Failing that I'll get DW to Delete them heh heh heh Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Elefan Report post Posted September 8, 2004 DW looks at the clock,....only another 400 or so cave cretins to gather,...and in the same fashion as Cinderella's coach turned into a pumpkin at midnight,.....so shall the cretins be DELETED!!!!!!! Mwaha ha ha ha ha,.................... What a wonderful plan of Banmans,....a party,...everyone's invited!!!!!!! Robbie hops up onto DW's muscular knee and twitches his nose in appreciation! His 'Elvis' fur-doo has been a right hit with his furry friend he met the other day. 'Furry friend' has remained silent in awe of him. Robbie likes this!! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
CarolJ Report post Posted September 8, 2004 Can we have a bit of karoke. My speciality "I will survive", Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Kris Report post Posted September 8, 2004 Next up the hokey cokey! Flippin good job we've got a first aid post for exactly this eventuality. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
CarolJ Report post Posted September 8, 2004 Request for a song pls - decidcated to Robbie! Chaz & Dave Rabbit, Rabbit, Rabbit! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
baddad Report post Posted September 8, 2004 Hold on, I've already been blown out by a cyborg and you want to get rid of the only two girls here who are up for a bit of bum touching? What sort of party is this!!Delete woman, at your peril!! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
BANMAN Report post Posted September 8, 2004 MWAHAHA MWAHAHHAHHAH MWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH <cough> Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
baddad Report post Posted September 8, 2004 Robbie hops up onto DW's muscular knee must be all that scottish dancing... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
nel Report post Posted September 8, 2004 HAPPY BIRTHDAY! Congratulations on a fab forum love nel Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
baddad Report post Posted September 8, 2004 Carol J, welcome. Where've yer been? It was far too quiet without you! Right, if you can just turn those knickers down a bit... I didn't bring me sunglasses! Morgi - Neil young comes later, when all the chillun' are chillin', dude! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
CarolJ Report post Posted September 8, 2004 Captn C - when you have an affair with a scottish woman its called a "Highland Fling"[groan] DW could give BRW a run for her money! All those dark winter nights in the Glens and the men in kilts with no undies! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
baddad Report post Posted September 8, 2004 Hi nel - couldn't see you there... move out of the glare of CJ's knickers! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Elefan Report post Posted September 8, 2004 BRW lies in the corner groaning,..... DW limps away,...... That's one problem solved!!!! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
baddad Report post Posted September 8, 2004 All those dark winter nights in the Glens and the men in kilts with no undies! Once again, by popular demand and for one further night only... IS ANYTHING WORN UNDER THE KILT?? NO IT'S ALL IN PERFECT WORKING ORDER!! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
