Jump to content
desperate

Home Educating

Recommended Posts

Hi all ,

This is my first posting here !! My son of 13 1/2 is now awaiting a multi - agency meeting and will be home schooled !!. In brief he has Aspergers ,OCD , ADHD ,Tourettes ,and extreme anxieties !!! His whole school life ( and life in general ) has been very hard !! When he went to secondry school he hardly attended , due to bad obssesions and Anxieties

Then he spent the last year at a hospital school We found him a local school with a really good unit for aspergers children !!! He is a very clever lad and went into mainstream lessons with one to one help !!

But this has all broken down He just does'nt like to leave home plus concentration is very very bad !!!!( He is house bound anyway , He has never gone out alone , He will at a push go out with mum or dad on occasions, )

So any information that you think might be of helpto me would be gratefully received !!!

Also he is very gifted on the comuter and we feel his future will be in this field , i have looked into further developing his skills in this there are courses he could go on as and when he feels he can , its just up the road, he is obssessed with computers and is like a sponge for knowledge .There is a diploma at the end of it !!!

I am in reciept of DLA and Carers but these courses are very costly is there anything available to help financially with this ????

I look forward to your replies

many thanks

julia

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Hi Julia,

 

I can't give you much information with regard to the cost of courses, although I do know that we don't usually get any reduction. But I will give you some hope. My son David now 17 became housebound aged 13 after a total breakdown and refusing to go to school. He had always hated going out and always hated school. He did not get his dx until he was 13. He pretty much stayed in his own room.

 

Following the dx we decide to give up on school and made him aware of our decision. Now although we did not see the impact of this decision at once, slowly over the months David relaxed and first of all left his room, began eating with the family again and then even found he wanted to leave the house.

 

Now aged 17 he goes out and about - although not alone - to many and different places. He loves the Cinema, loves playing Snooker, after he found out by accident that he was really rather good at it, and he also likes eating out. His forst love with always be Computers and games but his interests did grow once his anxieties became less.

 

Carole

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

My son Luke is in his final year of Primary School, we have been refused statutory assessment and are actually going to SENDIST tribunal over this against our LEA and the school over this this month!

 

We have not been offered the secondary school we feel has the best SEN support (the SENCO has a son with aspergers and sees same specialist as my son)

Infact we were not offered EITHER of our choices and were only offered the nearest school (we did NOT list this school for a reason!)

It is ALL BOYS so no good for a child with social skills issues and it has been on special measures for 4 years!

 

I have refused the place very strongly lol and am going to appeal to the school we put as 1st choice, I have a letter from my SENCO strongly explaining why the all boys school is totally the wrong place for him.

 

I have informed the LEA I will home school untill we get a place after he leaves primary school this year.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Hi everyone, I am having really bad problems at the moment with my 11 yr old, he has had a terrible time since he started 'big' school, he hasnt settled at all, he has no friends and the senco dept hadnt let individual teachers know he has AS, so he hasnt been getting the help he should have and his school work has suffered really badly. It has got so bad now that he has flatly refused to go to school at all, I dont feel that I can make him go, he is so unhappy at school and spends breaks and lunchtimes in the toilets! Im seriously considering home-education for him and I wondered if anyone could give me any advice also how much support is there for parents that opt for home-ed,Im really worried about K's education, but if he is this miserable at school how on earth can he learn anything? HELP!!! Im scared of making the wrong decision! :pray:

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

HI, my son is in a tiny school 23 in whole school, he has explained to me that he doesnt want to go to senior school over 1000 kids at our local one, he says he would like to do animation (his special interest) at college.

I have decided that that is a good idea and I am happy to teach him at home, and I have access to animation facilities at my uni that i go to, I dont think secondary school is right for him and therefore I wont send him.. >:D<<'>

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Hi everyone, I am having really bad problems at the moment with my 11 yr old, he has had a terrible time since he started 'big' school, he hasnt settled at all, he has no friends and the senco dept hadnt let individual teachers know he has AS, so he hasnt been getting the help he should have and his school work has suffered really badly. It has got so bad now that he has flatly refused to go to school at all, I dont feel that I can make him go, he is so unhappy at school and spends breaks and lunchtimes in the toilets! Im seriously considering home-education for him and I wondered if anyone could give me any advice also how much support is there for parents that opt for home-ed,Im really worried about K's education, but if he is this miserable at school how on earth can he learn anything? HELP!!! Im scared of making the wrong decision! :pray:

 

We home educate our 11 year old AS son, we were terrified at first, but it's the best thing we've ever done. Education Otherwise is a must and a mine of information.

 

Site is www.education otherwise.org.uk

 

Ask away any questions that you want to know as I know there are a few of us that home educate on here.

 

Denise 2

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

May not be such a bad thing temporarily. Ten hours a week is not as little as it sounds as it would be ten hours one to one with a teacher who is very likely experienced in teaching children with special needs. If you think of a school and how many hours a week are not actually spent actually learning (ie changing classrooms, assemblies, playtimes, breaks, PE). Our home tutoring service also offers groups so that children can meet others.

 

I work for an LEA Home tutoring service. I know its not a long term answer but you may even find the home tutor could help your child integrate back into a new school once he has a new place. Many home tutuors are very experienced teachers and have a background in special needs.

 

Dont rule it out completely, might be worth a go. Maybe ask the LEA if you can meet the Head of the home tutoring service to find out exactly what they could offer.

 

Good luck

Daisydot :partytime:

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

HE, what can I say? I home ed my youngest (5) and now wish I had done the same with all of them. Ben loves being with me, he loves to settle down with a good book and read to me. He loves doing 1-2-1 maths. In fact it is the best thing I have ever done for him. If I had my way all schools would be abolished.

 

I recently found out that universities will take HE kids without any GCSE/A levels. They see them as a safe bet. HE kids are more mature, willing to learn and self motivated than state educated kids. Employers also like HE kids. The way they look at it is, if they have a room full of people all waiting for an interview the home ed ones will be better to employ because the chances are they have spent time learning the subject they are most interested in instead of having the wide range of subjects they have to learn at school. Therefore they are more likely to be better at their chosen career.

 

Anyone who can HE should try it. You can always send the child back to school if it dosen't work out.

 

Well thats my oppinion anyway.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
I recently found out that universities will take HE kids without any GCSE/A levels. They see them as a safe bet. HE kids are more mature, willing to learn and self motivated than state educated kids.

 

I mentioned this in my article about qualifications. GCSEs are overrated qualifications and it isn't worth being unhappy at school just for the sake of a few GCSEs.

 

Employers also like HE kids. The way they look at it is, if they have a room full of people all waiting for an interview the home ed ones will be better to employ because the chances are they have spent time learning the subject they are most interested in instead of having the wide range of subjects they have to learn at school. Therefore they are more likely to be better at their chosen career.

 

I have discussed the issue of HE kids vs school educated kids with several employers and the attitudes vary. The owners of a garden centre took on a HE 16 year old because they think most HE kids are more mature and will relate better to staff and customers of a wide age range, whereas school educated kids have their minds ruined with popular youth culture and are less reliable people in the workplace. An engineer told me that school isn't just for academic learning but to learn social skills and how to relate to peers and respect the authority of teachers. He thinks that HE kids are recluses with poor social skills and are often narrow minded and wayward people who only want things their way. He said that his company would be a bit nervous when interviewing somebody who has been home educated.

 

I would be interested in knowing which type of careers prefer HE kids and which prefer kids that have gone to school.

 

Anyone who can HE should try it. You can always send the child back to school if it dosen't work out.

 

This is something that a lot of parents don't realise. They think that HE is a one way ticket when it isn't. Returning to school at the start of Y3, Y7, and Y10 is very easy but most schools will take kids any time.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Hi Lizzie,

 

My son is 12 (AS) and I home educated him for two years. It was purely out of desperation because we felt we couldn't go on with the situation at mainstream any longer. It did take me a while to find my feet but after a few months I really started to get my head around it and it turned out to be the best thing we'd ever done for him, in fact I still kick myself for not doing it sooner. Honestly, it's making the decision to do it that is the hardest part, it took us over a year to make the decision to do it because I was so terrified, but once I'd taken the plunge it was so liberating. My son made so much progress and gained so much confidence and maturity.

 

After two years we decided we wanted him to have the chance of secondary school so we faught for a place at an ASD unit in a mainstream. He's been there for a year now and it's been okayish but he hasn't a single friend and I think he's more lonely there than he ever was when he was at home. Part of me wishes I'd never sent him there but we did want him to have the opportunities that a secondary setting could offer.

 

Trouble is we never know what's best until after we' ve done it. GOOD LUCK!

 

~ Mel ~

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Further to the above

 

Section 319 of the 1996 Education Act gives LEAs the power to arrange for special educational provision to be made otherwise than in school.

 

Lisa if you are considering doing this, the first step is to write to the LEA and ask them to amend the statement in part 4 in order to record that she is being educated at home. At the same time, you may want to think about any kind of support which would be helpful to you when providing for your daughter. For example, a weekly visit by a specialist teacher, or a therapist.

 

This is an example of letter of what to write.

 

Dear Chief Education Officer,

 

I am writing as a parent of ???, who has a statement of special educational needs maintained by your Authority. I wish to inform you that I intend to exercise my right under section 7 of 1996 education act to educate ?? at home. I believe that I can do this in a way which is appropriate to her age ability and aptitude and her special educational needs, and I will be happy to provide you with information on the programme and curriculum which I intend to arrange for????.

 

I believe that, in this situation, it is appropriate for you to amend ??.. statement in part 4 to reflect the new arrangement, and I request that you now do this as soon as possible. At the same time, I would like to request amendments to part 3 of the statement in the form of the following additional points:

 

You can then add the provision you think the LEA could provide for you.

If this does not work.

 

If your LEA refuse to amend Part 3 of the statement, you can still educate your daughter at home. However, you will not be entitled to the support for her which you would have had if Part 3 had been amended. Many LEAs more or less ignore children who are being educated at home by their parents. However, if you felt strongly about the additional support which an amended statement might give, you could ask for a fresh statutory assessment.

 

Your LEA may amend the statement, but not exactly as you requested. For example, they may be happy to refer to the home education arrangement in Part 4 but not want to commit themselves to providing any help under Part 3. In this situation you will be able to appeal to the Special Educational Needs Tribunal.

 

Finally, LEAs have a duty to prosecute parents when they believe that they are failing to ensure that their children are receiving an appropriate education. It is unlikely to happen, but if you are threatened with prosecution you will need legal advice from a solicitor. You would need to get in touch with one of the education advice lines for some advice and the name of a solicitor.

I hope this has helped you and any other parents considering home education.

 

Good luck Lisa with whatever you decide to do.

 

Nellie.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Hi Nellie,

 

I'm new to the list and have just read your post on statementing and home education. The letter you quoted, is that up to date as I'm going through the statementing process with my ds aged 4 in May. I haven't had a reply back yet for me to name a school of my choice, but I'm been reading up on home education and feel this is now the way I want to go. What happens in my case.

 

Dawn

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Hi Dawn,

 

My ds went to school for a year and a term. We deregistered in December. Home ed for us has been really relaxing and the whole family has benfitted. As far as i know if your child isn't registered at school and you want your child to have a statement, you just need to ask that the LEA put educated otherwise in part 4 of the statement. My son has a statement but while we are HE we do not have to follow it, it is for the LEA to maintain not us. We have agreed to the LEA coming to visit us at home, and they are coming on Thursday so it will be interesting to see what they say.

 

Hope that helps

Mary

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Hi Dawn,

 

My ds went to school for a year and a term. We deregistered in December. Home ed for us has been really relaxing and the whole family has benfitted. As far as i know if your child isn't registered at school and you want your child to have a statement, you just need to ask that the LEA put educated otherwise in part 4 of the statement. My son has a statement but while we are HE we do not have to follow it, it is for the LEA to maintain not us. We have agreed to the LEA coming to visit us at home, and they are coming on Thursday so it will be interesting to see what they say.

 

Hope that helps

Mary

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

They tried to do this with my son because of behaviour problems - in a special school!

I don't mean to be nasty and I know it is hard work with our children but if people who choose to work with kids with autism, shouldn't they expect to deal with behaviour problems?

I would not choose home education for the reasons mentioned in your posts, and only think you should do it if it's something you decide to do - not what someone else decides for you.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Hi Mary,

 

many thanks for the reply.

 

Does any one get funding from their LEA, looking on the PEACH website it mentioned about funding using the Lovaas program, does anyone use that or know more?

 

Dawn

 

I definately know someone ho got LEA funding for her daughter to go to the Higashi school in Boston USA.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
I definately know someone ho got LEA funding for her daughter to go to the Higashi school in Boston USA.

 

 

:robbie:

Hi,

 

I am interested in finding out further about 'Home educating'.

 

We live in Wales, are all the regulations the same ?

 

I am aware that schools can be funny about this as they are funded, but my son who is in his first yr of secondary school has been under IEP's ever since starting reception year.

 

We have attended many meetings with SENCO and the ED PYSC and so on but problems still remain.

 

My son also refuses to take part in GAMES/PE in which the head of yr and games staff are aware of my son's issues of AS, and we were hoping things would have moved forward by now, but nothing changes.

My son hasn't made one single friend, this is distressing, he is obviously unhappy, does not speak up for himself and always picked on etc.

Everyday is an issue.

 

He is not statemented but the school are several months behind with assessing my son and are making out he is settled, but we know different.

Everyday there is homework where we end up helping him through and through as he cannot cope doing it alone and finds it all too much, and the school are aware of this too.

 

My son confessed he hid in the school toilets Thurs and Friday just gone whilst Games/PE lessons were taking place, no one noticed even although the register was taken.........so why didnt they look out for him ??

 

I am seriously thinking about home educating my son, but with less hassle as possible from the school.

 

I also have an older son who is 18 and is will be sitting his A levels soon.

So they cannot put this down to bad parenting !!!

 

So what I need to know is where to start, the regulations in Wales, and if I will get hassled or so from the school as we could do without this !!

 

As much info as possible will be a great help in making me decide, many thanks to all in advance.

 

Cheers Di xx :thumbs:

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I am Home educating my DS11 whom has Aspergers and mears Irlen syndrome. We removed him from mainstream school last July and have never looked back :thumbs: He is so much happier, learning much more and socialising on his terms. We find he does more work in one day than he ever did in a week at school. :thumbs: He gets to decide when and what he studies(suprisingly, he even asks to do maths which he hated at school). If he wants a day to chill, then thats what we do.

 

I have just joined NAGC and hope our DS will get the chance to meet with other children who understand his need for constant information. He has an amazing mind and keeping up with him is a learning curve for all the familiy. We are also members of Education Otherwise and they have a hive of information. Well worth a visit to their website if you are considering HE: www.education-otherwise.org They have a legal section for Englend, Scotland and Wales so you can find out where you stand if you want to HE your child.

 

It would be great to hear from other families who are HEing and ASD child or are considering HE >:D<<'>

Keep smilin

Elly

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

School's in for gifted Mark

 

May 8 2002

 

By Catherine Turner

 

 

Michigan-born Kitt Cowlishaw calls her son by ringing a triangle dangling in the hallway of their spacious, modern detached home.

 

Mark Cowlishaw with his mum Kitt

 

The pitter-patter of feet is heard upstairs and a beautiful, slight boy with expressive dark eyes, long eyelashes and dark brown hair quickly appears.

 

When he reaches the bottom of the stairs the child bows graciously at Kitt and greets her with the word "konnichiha" - good day in Japanese.

 

This is the start of their weekly Japanese lesson.

 

It continues at the dining room table with a picture guessing game. Mark, who is becoming fluent in the language, wins every time.

 

The mother-of-one, who lives in leafy Gibbet Hill, Coventry, explains: "Autistic children are easily startled. Mark and I have come up with our own system.

 

"I call him by ringing a triangle at the bottom of the stairs."

 

Kitt is attending Japanese nightclasses at Warwick University so she can pass on the lessons to her son, who she teaches from home.

 

She said: "Our Japanese lessons all started when the Japan Foundation and BBC education appealed for children to take part in a pilot scheme. It involved teaching Japanese to 11 to 14 years old on the internet.

 

"I thought this would suit Mark's needs as he loves the internet."

 

Mark who has Asperger's Syndrome, a form of autism, is super intelligent.

 

His IQ was found by an educational psychologist to be among the top one per cent in the country.

 

Kitt, who met her British husband while working at US computer firm IBM, said: "The educational psychologist said what these children actually need is a programme for gifted children."

 

The bright youngster could read from the age of two, has passed his Grade 4 piano exam with distinction and can quote large chunks of Shakespeare off the top of his head. He also plays the harp and is on Grade 4.

 

In Mark's first year of primary school he had a kind, loving teacher who accepted his "bizarre behaviour".

 

But the following year his new teacher was very strict and refused to tolerate any deviation from the norm.

 

Kitt said: "She punished him by making him stand by the door.

 

"If I asked him what he had been punished for, he was never able to tell me. That's when he first began to talk about killing himself. He was six years old. I was terribly shocked."

 

Four years ago when Mark was eight Kitt and her husband were asked to take their son out of a selective private school in Winchester - where they lived for 15 years.

 

Kitt had hoped Mark's intellectual ability would be appreciated. But in reality she found the opposite to be true.

 

In Home Educating Our Autistic Spectrum Children, the book she has co-edited about hers and other parents' experiences, Kitt said: "After only one term, just before Christmas, the headmaster informed us that Mark was not to return to school in January.

 

"His behaviour was too distracting for the other children and too embarrassing to the other parents.

 

"He skipped along the path to class instead of walking. He spoilt football practice by spinning in circles in the middle of the playing field. He laughed too loudly in assembly. He hummed in class. He had no friends.

 

"I was overwhelmed by grief and dis-belief. Mark was such a gentle, peaceful boy. How could they throw him out of school for skipping? He hadn't broken any rules or done anything dangerous."

 

The headmaster advised the couple that Mark was "obviously severely brain damaged and belonged in a residential home for the disabled".

 

Kitt continued: "But what about his academic ability?" I asked. "Mark is so bright. He won't be stretched in a special school."

 

"To my amazement the headteacher lost his temper and shouted at me that Mark's ability was below average and he didn't belong in a school with normal children. I was stunned."

 

Mark's parents fought the decision for three months. Meanwhile they searched for alternatives.

 

They visited special schools but saw violent, destructive, illiterate children who had been excluded from schools across the county.

 

Kitt said: "I didn't see anyone like Mark. I cried every day. Mark has never been disruptive. If you put a book in his hands he would sit there for hours.

 

"Mark is a very quiet, intelligent boy and would not thrive in a situation where people were being loud and physically rough.

 

"What I have come to learn is that autistic children do not learn in a group of 30. They are much better off in a small group or one-to-one."

 

After much deliberation Kitt decided to teach Mark herself. The first year was particularly hard.

 

She bought course materials and assessment tests for every National Curriculum subject on the syllabus, recorded overnight broadcasts of educational TV programmes and sent off for revision guides and computer software.

 

But she found that most of the material was never needed. It was, she describes, an "initial panic buying phase".

 

Four years on and Mark is thriving. His mum said: "He has blossomed with home education. We are so much happier.

 

"He speaks his mind and he is not being bullied or singled out as the intelligent one."

 

Mark has always had an insatiable appetite for reading.

 

The 12-year-old said: "I like science fiction and fantasy books. My favourite character is a general called Bean in a book called Ender's Game.

 

"He is rather autistic - lacking in feeling but extremely logical and intelligent. I feel in some ways he is similar to me."

 

Mark knows he is different to other children: he is given the label "autistic" and so he calls them "neuro-typical".

 

Every Sunday Kitt prints out a timetable for the coming week as Mark likes to know what is planned and she keeps a diary of all his academic work.

 

At a local support group for parents of children with Asperger's Syndrome Kitt was the only mum educating her child at home.

 

In the book she says: "A common thread ran through their stories: the parents spent most of their time and energy trying to educate teachers about autism, while the teachers spent most of their time trying to make the children act normal.

 

"I began to realise how lucky we were to be free of school."

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

At present I have 5 hours home tuition for my son .This was started this week .According to the home tuition co ordinatator this is all he gets we are currently in the process of a stat assessment.

If he was excluded he would be intitled to 25 hours a week. Thankfully he didnt kick a teacher...but if he had done and was excluded hed be better of....What does that say .......keep fighting xoxoxosharss

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Just to let anyone who still remembers us know that we have now been home-edding for a while. We found a 25 hour statement basically unenforcable on the ground, despite jumping through all the legal hoops to try to rectify this. A change of school fell through and the situation left was just not going to work, especially with the catatonic speed at which our LEA would work to sort out another school. (If they ever manage it, they can come back to me.)

 

We've joined EO and an on-line list for home-edders with special needs kids, and the support is invaluable. Luckily DS just loves the subscription to Learnpremium and will now work from books with little fuss. We're plugging the problem of what to write and how to structure it with an excellent programme, "Writing Skills" by Diana Hanbury King that I had shipped in from the USA via "Better Books". This programme was recommended by an EP (private) who specialises in dyslexia. DS has made huge progress with "Writing Skills Book A", but there are still 3 more workbooks to go. DS usually hates workbooks, but he can see the progress he is making and is just so much more cooperative at home than he was at school. He types and we glue his paragraphs etc in.

 

Home-ed is certainly easier for us than school, but I've always loved teaching, having taught as a private tutor for various subjects and more formally at a university anyway, in the past. Doing "privates" is like slipping into an old glove really - quite cosy! I'd forgotten how much fun learning can be - if it is geared specifically to the actual child. Rather sad at how sour the current education system made us... and how that defeated feeling crept up and numbed our brains so we felt, for so long, that any other option was somehow "wrong". Now we feel free-range rather than battery, and the enthusiasm for going out and about and learning is returning. Yeah.

 

Anyway, it's good to be able to report that we are happy rather than distressed. Wishing all faces, old and new, all the best.

 

Take care,

 

VS xx

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Valiant Skylark

 

What a lovely post! Really glad to hear it's going so well.

 

We began home educating our then 13 year old just over two years ago and, I can honestly say, it gave us our son back.

 

Best wishes

 

Barefoot

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Valiant Skylark..... nice to meet you and to read such a positive post, we have been home ed'ing for about a month (my son AS is currently signed off school with stress and anxiety) though hard to begin with we finally getting there, the past two days have been brill and he's worked so hard, its been fun too, like Barefoot has said, it has given us our son back too.

 

Clare x x x

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I have just embarked on home education due to the 'system' constantly letting him down and teachers not accepting my sons has problems...I have the problem apparently and it reflects on him giving rise to extremely bad behaviour from him!

 

I am not worrying about exams for him, he is 11. In few years, or soon if he wishes, he will either return to school provided it will manage him properly or go to college to do exams. He enjoys his home education and works on his own with little opposition...so why was there so much opposition in school? Well if he keeps being told how useless he is he won't work will he!

 

He gets his social interaction from friends, yes he does have them just none in school, and clubs at the local leisure centre...he gets voluntary and more productive social interaction instead of forced social interaction.

 

The resources are out there for mainstream education to work for our children, the schools even get extra money to implement it if they have children in the school, so why don't schools use it? Apathy? Or is it league tables?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I am flexi schooling as J is ment to be in school but he has school refusal and extreame challenging behaviour so we are trying home schooling but I have to say that its absaloutly exhausting, how on earth do you manage it, I have all the other tasks to do too, like housework, shopping, laundry, entertaining J and looking after his needs, its madness, today I have not stopped, J hasnt either, though his is totally voluntarily, running and jumping with refreshed energy with each gulp of air he takes, me I am totally astonished that he can last so long, me my body is limp from total exhaustion.

 

We are keeping to a routine but most of that is around Js educational needs, so we are trying to keep a structured timetable of different activities that stimulate and interest J but it leaves me little time to do the rest of my responsibilities, I think I know number one rule in home education and thats planning and preperation, so been organised, a very difficult taks I particually find hard.

 

J has responded amazingly well to the new routine, J is up and dressed and had breakfast by 9:30am and ready to do activities that are all on his sheet all in coloured visual displays, two weeks ago he was refysing the smallest of tasks as he knew it was a step further to going into school which had a drastic knock on effect to his day routine and evening as he just simply was so hyperactive due to stress about school that he wasnt asleep until gone 2am meaning he was exhausted in the morning adding mood issues on top of his behaviour so the new routine isnt as stressful but its demanding and to be honest constant attention as he requires my support for pretty much everything he does.

 

Today we had to use public transport due to the high winds canceling out cycling but by the time we got to our destination, did our activities and then had dinner and walked back to the bus stop for our bus most of the afternoon had vanished, so I now know that I am going to have to be as organised as much as possible but this afternoon it really was just mother nature so it cant be helped even with the best plans in place.

 

How do you do home education and is anyone doing it who are a single parent?

 

JsMum

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I am a single parent and disabled. It takes a while to de-school them, but you are still doing flexi school.

 

I think what you are doing is trying to run things like a school.

 

Going out to the shops is education....adding up, estimating, budgeting.

 

Doing housework, learning how to use things, fold things etc

 

Life is about educating, it doesn't all have to come out of a book. When out my son will ask me why this and what's that, how does it etc.

 

As for organisation, many just do what pops up during the day. My lad prefers structure so we have a timetable, we don't always stick to it. It is written on a board every morning and he merrily works his way through the list he has. So what if one math question last 30 mins...he learnt how to do it.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I remember how exhausting it was to home ed. I found it essential for myself to have a bit of time for me at the end of the day. 3.30 was MY time, Jay would have a snack and watch some children's telly and I'd usually have a lie down, as I was so tired by then or read a book in my room for a bit, away from Jay. We had a loose timetable, whereby we'd do work for a couple of hours in the morning and then after lunch would be spent just going for a walk or to the library or doing some painting or cooking, that worked well for us.

 

~ Mel ~

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Hi I am defo not doing it like a school system, I dont have any thing that resembles writing or reading, he hates it anyway, but what we are doing is swimming, photography, film making, internet, tv documentaries, bike riding, seeing musiems visiting different places of interest and using his camera to record things that are really atracting Js attention, it is not school in any way, the timetable is only in place because J does need structure and I cant have flexi timetable because if it says swimming in the morning and musiem in the afternoon then we have to follow it to a T, and it would be hell if it didnt happen or there was a change.

 

flexi school is what I call it but at home its home education and school is school.

 

flexi school is a term the LEA use for recording the Absences for Authorisation.

 

I do not want anything to do with a school system, we made something the other day and he was reacting as though he was on a torture table so imagine him if this was writing and reading?

 

I am always sharing things with him naturally on our trips and tours of the countryside so we are use to that but I wanted something a bit more formal and structured, thats why we have the visualised timetable and sadly it will have to be set in stone for Js needs.

 

I am just finding it hard to take on the other responsibilties of the home and myself as well as Js education and health needs and wonder how on earth you do it, its been constant right up until gone 10pm when he had his melatonin and now its still, calm, and peacful.

 

but I ve been up since 7am and I still have laundry and floors to clean.

 

JsMum

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

best thing to do is set a time of start and a time of finishing. Housework jobs, do they need to be done every day?

 

Maybe he is trying to relax into HE and needs time to just calm down to the fact he is 'free'

 

If you haven't already done so try and find some HE groups in your area, enrol J in leisure activities if you can...contact your leisure centre about this. You will be surprised just how clued up swimming and leisure instructors are in regards to children with an ASD. My sons swimming instructor got him to go in the deep end of the pool to swim with her beside him whilst he was on the verge of a melt down through fear. He did it, she didn't push too hard, and was little shocked but chuffed to bits. He did it because she was calm and reassuring and talked to him the entire time

 

As for the washing, put it on before you go to bed and hang it out during one of the planed breaks you should factor in for J during the day...your time and J time separately.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
my son has been offered ten hours a week home education.

At the moment we have refused this because it does not meet the needs of his statement and offers no oppertunity for social inclusion. We have asked the LEA to endeavour to find him a placement in an appropriate peer group.

As he has missed most of the last three years at school and has virtually no contact with the outside world we feel it is more important to try to develop interaction and communication skills than to concentrate on school work. Besides which ten hours a week is going to do very little to compensate for lost time.

We are also frightened that by accepting home education the situation will be allowed to drift and no further imput will be sought for him As he is already 14 it would be disasterous for his future for this to be allowed to happen.

Does anyone else have experience of home education for ASD children, if so what was the benefits, if any for their child?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Dont dismisss this offer too quickly.

 

My experience, both as someone who 'sorts things' for complex and fascinating children and young people within a large LA, (as a LA employee) and as someone immersed in the world of autism in lots of ways for many (30) years, is that for some, probably many, CYP with asd, being 'in' school is often painful and probably counter productive.

 

If you look at the histories of many of the people with asd currently talking about their expereinces, significant pain and time out of the system are recurrent themes e.g. Wendy Lawson and Claire Sainsbury)

 

A year or two or three of home ed, supplemented by (probably your) creative efforts to appropriately expand your child's horizons, may be a much better preparation for successful and happy adulthood than whatever your LA can offer - dont forget that in the UK, all that LA's have to offer is what would be considered good enough at that point in history - (the Bolam test).

 

If you can afford the time and energy, I suggest you critically assess what YOU can offer vs what the LA can offer - and go for what you think is best for your child. By all means continue to push your LA to make better provision - but be sure it is better! Some time spent with other CYP with ASD may be valuable, but too much may well be counter-productive.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

hi there

 

emlyn has just started his home education after months of asking for something finally he has an hour a day 4 days a week now better than nothing.

 

the tutor has already said that he is work around a 3 to 4 year old level so 7 years behind

 

she has also said that she is going to run some test over next week to see had bad things are as he is no where near the level that the education said he was

 

told her i am not surprised said this would happen if the education refused to educate him so all proof for my appeal hearing in october the LA are quickly starting to look like vindictive fouls with the evidence i have now got and is coming in on a daily bases

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Hi there folks

 

Its only from today I have handed in the de-register letter to the head of school about HE my son was in year 9 of a mainstream secondary school age 13.

 

Daniel has Aspergers Syndrome, High levels of Anxiety and after a battle he was then moved into a special needs class, no statement, but on school action plus etc with IEP which is way behind now in reviews, but the bullying issues were still ongoing, it was affecting him both mentally and physically.

Enough is enough.

 

Now I have read through some Home Ed sites, and understand these procedures differ depending where you live, we are in South Wales (UK), and any further information will be a good help, thank you.

 

Both myself and husband have been talking about it for many months now but it was the last blow yesterday, the school has had almost 3 yrs to sort this out and many are surprised why I have left it this long.

So its all go from today folks.

 

So far we have sorted out all his school work books, well the ones he has at home, such as English, Maths, Science, History etc and plan to build on this by purchasing what he will need, bless he did also complete some maths sheets today too and also a Physics worksheet so far, so he is more than willing to learn.

 

Anyone else going through this, please can you tell me what I should expect now that my son is de registered as from today?

Many thanks.

 

I am aware the Head of yr contacts the LEA, hopefully the attendance welfare department too.

 

Thanks folks. :thumbs:

 

Di

x

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

After the latest fiasco with my lad n he dont even want to leave the house im seriously looking at pulling him from school....but the other half aint exactly supportive n is just saying do you think you are capable n can you cope....grgh.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

Loading...

×
×
  • Create New...