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rickrum

So, yeah, I suspect I have aspergers

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But I'm extremely reluctant to self-diagnose. Or, at least, to come to a diagnosis without the imput of others who know more about AS than I do. I've suspected it for a while, ever since I came across a site the described the symptoms-- some of them are spot on. It was so creepy to read things that describe me so perfectly, because it's hard for me to convey what the hell is going on in my head. I just assumed everyone else functioned the same way, but apparently not. The aspects of AS that seem to describe me so well are the social interaction parts-- I cannot decipher nonverbal clues (I'll 'guess' what someone is feeling, and I'm usually wrong), and I take what people say literally. I was on wikipedia, and there was an anecdote about a girl picking up a phone. The person on the other line asked if someone was there. She knew he was in the house, but he wasn't in the room, so she said 'no' and hung up. I've done that. I've done similar things. People will say something sarcastic, or tell a joke, and I'll respond seriously and wonder why they're getting upset. Also, I must concentrate very hard on what people are saying. If I don't, it becomes a string of sound-- I can repeat it perfectly, and I know I recognize the words, but I can't make the connection that it's speech. This will happen even if I'm in the middle of a conversation, and have been listening for quite a while. Repeating the phrase doesn't do any good, so people get frustrated when they have to repeat things over and over again and it doesn't seem to stick. I also have this odd habit... before I speak, I must mentally 'edit' a sentence. I have to construct it (visually) before I can say it. People say I end up sounding like I'm reciting lines from a play...

Another thing is what I always felt was 'living in an alien culture'. I have no idea how to act, at all. It's little things, too, that people seem to do subconsciously that I have to overtly manipulate in order to 'fit in'. Or, how my face should look when people tell me a story-- how to convey emotions and which expressions are appropriate.

Still, though, some aspects of AS don't fit me at all. I had some really intense interests as a kid, but not any more. I'll have fleeting interests that seem to envelop all my time, but they'll disappear almost as quickly as they come. I like routine, but breaking it doesn't cause me any severe anxiety. My speech isn't overly formal or poetic, something I've read is common for people with AS. My relationships aren't 'age-level inappropriate'. These seem to be big parts of AS, so I've been led to believe that I'm just a really, really, awkward person who happens to have a lot in common with those with AS. I know none of you know me, but I wanted to know if this sounds like it could be AS. If you think it could be, what do I do? Do I see a doctor, read some more, or keep doing what I've been doing? I function relatively well-- I've learn to 'cover up' a lot of my peculiarities, and it doesn't inhibit me in any major way. It does make me feel isolated... and I'm pretty inept in social situations.

 

Anyway, yeah. Um... discuss?

 

Also, thanks for reading this.

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Hi there,

 

I'm not an expert in diagnosing ASD, but it sounds like you might be. Have you read the thread about myths connected to ASD?

No 2 people are the same, so not having certain symptoms doesn't mean you can't get dx.

 

I have a little son who might have Aspergers, and I'm here to try and find out what I can, and also to be able to understand a little bit of what it's like living in his world.

If I was you, I personally would like to get a dx, and then look into getting appropriate support. Also, I don't know what your family background is, but knowing what it is might help people in your life understand your needs better.

 

I think you're done the right thing by joining the forum. >:D<<'>

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Another thing is what I always felt was 'living in an alien culture'. I have no idea how to act, at all. It's little things, too, that people seem to do subconsciously that I have to overtly manipulate in order to 'fit in'. Or, how my face should look when people tell me a story-- how to convey emotions and which expressions are appropriate.

 

Hi Rickrum

 

I'm pretty new to all this as my daughter has only recently been diagnosed (at 12yrs). But it sounds to me like you're doing the first big step forward by coming on this forum and I'm sure someone will come along pretty soon offering you some great advice.

 

I noticed you saying about 'living in an alien culture' - and I've read this expression as how AS people feel many times. We'd read somewhere for tips about how people see things differently and to try and explain how to 'fit in' to watch 'Third Rock from the Sun' - we bought the series for our daughter and she's an avid watcher of it now - we go through all the scenario's and she's really starting to pick it up and finding it funny - she's becoming more self aware I think.

 

Good luck and take care,

Jb

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Hi rickrum, and welcome to the forum, :)

 

A lot of what you describe could be AS - obviously you would have to talk things through in depth with an experienced professional to be sure. Your first step would be to take your concerns to your GP who can then refer you on for a full assessment.

 

On the question of what you should do next - that would be a personal decision depending on what you think a firm diagnosis would give you. It could be that you are content to live with things as they are, with the added insight that you may have AS, or you may feel that the certainty of a diagnosis would help you and others understand yourself better.

 

This NAS sheet gives more information about getting a diagnosis as an adult.

 

Whatever you decide, this forum will give you lots of information and help, so stay with us!

 

Kathryn

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I noticed you saying about 'living in an alien culture' - and I've read this expression as how AS people feel many times. We'd read somewhere for tips about how people see things differently and to try and explain how to 'fit in' to watch 'Third Rock from the Sun' - we bought the series for our daughter and she's an avid watcher of it now - we go through all the scenario's and she's really starting to pick it up and finding it funny - she's becoming more self aware I think.

 

Ha! I love that show. I haven't seen it in a while, though, ever since it went off the air.

 

Thanks for the replies, guys. I'm going to read some more, although I haven't come across anything new... except maybe for lack of physical coordination. One thing they mentioned was terrible handwriting-- I'm 17, and I write like a 4 year old. I reckon that my teachers need translators to make sense of my assignments-- it's that bad! It's disheartening, because, really, I'm a damn good writer. I write for our school newspaper, and I also write short stories and poetry. I just have to type everything!

 

Kathryn, thanks for the link. Do you have any more?

 

--pat

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I enjoy writing poetry and short stories as well.i suspect I have a.s. tendancies.In my case i feel it is a small compensation for the problems I can have with verbal communication.

 

Hope you get some answers soon >:D<<'> >:D<<'> >:D<<'>

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Hi again Rickrum,

 

If you're looking for basic information about autistic spectrum conditions, many of the information sheets on the National Autistic Society website are a good place to start.

 

If you want to do some more extensive reading, I can recommend that you get hold of one of the excellent autobiographies written by an adult with AS. Liane Holliday Willey: Pretending to be Normal is a good one to begin with. Wendy Lawson, Temple Grandin and Donna Williams have also written personal accounts of having AS.

 

There aren't many autobiographies written by men, unfortunately, but I have come across one: Glass half empty, Glass half full by Chris Mitchell. I haven't read this but have read a favourable review of it.

 

These are just my personal recommendations - I'm sure others will add their own.

 

Kathryn

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Hello, and welcome.

 

I am another adult with AS.

 

You don't have to have every symptom to have AS.

 

The "age-inappropriate relationships" bit, well, I think that autistics/aspies often grow up more slowly. I know that at 18 I was far less mature than my peers, but at 24, I have probably caught up. I am still different, but in terms of maturity, I feel more equal to other people than I used to. It just takes us longer than most.

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