Jump to content
opal

child seeing councillor

Recommended Posts

Do any of your children see a regular councillor to sort out there problems as the weeks go by.

I have often thought this would help with all the stressed everyday life brings to an AS child. I do feel helpless at times

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

My As son has never seen a councillor.But we did once have some sort of phycotherapist come to our house to chat to him abut "issues". Put it like this when this cross between david belamy and patrick moore had left my son said well that was a load of old mumbo jumbo.I cancelled all further appointments.

 

From my own personal experiance of seeing a councillor due to depression and other stuff i found it was a waste of time and just made everything worse as i started to visit places in my mind and stuff that i would have prefered to have stayed burried.

 

No doubt for some maybe some on here it is usefull.

 

Not all therapies and remedies fit every person.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Hi opal -

 

I think it depends on the age of the child and their grasp of the 'issues' as it were...

Sometimes our kids feel stuff, but can't seem to put a handle on WHY they feel it, and no amount of counselling will help them with that if they lack the self awareness to be able to explore those whys...

On the other hand, a child may be able to identify 'parts' of the problem but not the whole, or may actually know precisely the issues that hurt them but feel unable to express them with the people who are closest to (and possibly even contributing to) them. Counselling could be hugely beneficial in these circumstances, both in terms of exploring the issues, and perhaps as a tool for resolving them. It can also create 'bridges' of understanding in situations where direct conflicts arise within families, by enabling people to talk about things that would maybe be too intimidating in the usual environment.

One other HUGE benefit to counselling: It can actually allow people to see that their opinions (and sometimes LIVES) are valid, and that their expectations of others (or others expectations of them) are valid and reasonable too...

As Paula says - horses for courses, but i think counselling is a hugely beneficial process for people who have been/are denied (or are in denial themselves) the opportunity to 'realise' their individuality and their right to that individuality. For people with AS/ASD - who are routinely 'forced' to submerge themselves in order to meet a sometimes wholly inappropriate NT 'ideal' this could be fundamental...

 

Sorry - waffle... In a nutshell: yes, i think counselling can be very helpful!! :lol:

 

L&P

BD :D

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

My daughter currently has a CPN visit every three weeks - to go over self awareness and any worries that she may have and also to try and talk to her about her diagnosis (she was diagnosed Nov 05). She is 12yrs old - I think this will carry on for a little while - and will happen again when she reaches 15 or 16 (or any other time if any problems happen with her swallowing/eating again).

 

Jb

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

William has just had a course of cognitive behaviour therapy. The main thing they were trying to help him to do was to distinguish his thoughts from his feelings. As far as I can gather from the therapy report is that he will not be able to make any headway until he is able to grasp this concept. This seems to be a universal problem with ASD and without that ability then counselling wouldn't help. It seems to be fundamental in some of the social issues, his feelings and thoughts are just not inline with reality quite often, which is why he has such major difficulties at school and in other areas. I have tried to follow the same programme as William, mainly so I could understand how I can help him. I found that seperating your thoughts from feelings, and then reality checking both of them according to different situations is pretty damn hard!

 

Lauren

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I think the effectiveness of counselling depends on the counsellor. I think it's essential that they have some knowledge of ASD - otherwise the child will end up baffled and frustrated. My daughter only lasted two sessions of psychotherapy at camhs and refused to go back. She didn't know what the therapist's function was or what was expected of her in an open ended non structured therapy session, and the uncertainty made her fearful and suspicious. She found it very difficult to talk at all, let alone talk about feelings and a whole hour of this kind of pressure made her more anxious than before. She only relaxed when she was able to talk about her special interests, but the therapist treated that as an attempt to hide what she really wanted to express - (she had no experience of ASD). I actually found the sessions were causing more harm than good so we pulled the plug.

 

She tried art therapy too but didn't find that helpful as she got irritated with the therapist trying to analyse everything she drew. However I think art and /or music therapy can help some ASD children from what I've heard, as they have the freedom to express themselves non verbally.

 

Not wanting to put you off Opal, I think counselling can help some children when you've found the counsellor and the approach that suits your child.

 

K

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

James saw a psychotherapist for nearly 2 years, against my better judgement I was convinced to let it continue that long. The whole idea was to let him express all the thoughts and feelings he couldn't or wouldn't tell me in an attempt to find a reason for his aggression and lying. I was not to be told anything that he had said in the sessions.

He viewed it as an excuse to be out of school and a way that he could control an adult for an hour a week. After all this it made no change to his behaviour at all, so I requested a meeting with the therapist and psychiatrist to call a stop to it. I couldn't believe what this woman was saying :angry: . She commented on how different my accent was from his, he had managed to convince her he had a broad scouse accent (we've never lived anywhere near Liverpool or known anyone with that accent). She thought we had 6 children, we only have 4, 3 living with us and a stepson who lives with his mum. According to her my "flitting between partners" was a reason for him feeling insignificant, I've only ever been with his birth father and my husband who adopted them all a couple of years ago :wub: . Every item she brought up as a significant reason for his aggression was a complete lie by James. When asked why he lied he simply said "when I told her the truth she kept on at me but if I told her a lie she shut up and started writing so I got peace to play" :whistle:

You would think that she had at least read his file or got a basic family background from the consultant?

 

 

Sorry went off on a bit of a ramble :oops: but I guess it depends a lot on the person you get, their understanding of ASD and whether the child themselves is capable of expressing exactly what is making them stressed.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

My son has been going to counselling for the last 3 months or so and there have been some setbacks like:

- he denies that he has done or not done something and is very stubborn about it :wallbash:

- he lies in order to hide his problems, for ex. he says that he's got lots of friends, that he likes sports etc , all totally the opposite

- he doesn't open up, so if the counsellor asks him about how's school he'll just say "fine" :blink:

- the counsellor initially tried to deal with his difficulties as a parenting issue, which I rejected and insisted they were AS related and that he couldn't help most of them. She took another approach, relying more on what I have to say (i am with my son during the sessions) and things have been better.

 

On the whole it has been good for him because the approach is to make him understand his feelings, face his actions, control his emotions and take responsibility ( I don't know if this is cognitive behavioural therapy) and these are things that M needs very much. He has made some progress and become a bit more independent and less aggressive. What has helped him most is medication combined with counselling because counselling alone was not enough to take his anxiety away which is at the root of some of his problems. As others have said, it works for some children if the counsellor is AS trained.

 

>:D<<'> Curra

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

Loading...

×
×
  • Create New...