tyw Report post Posted March 31, 2006 Hi, is there anyone out there with any coping stategies for dealing with a hubby with AS. He was diagnosed 4 years ago - aged 50 - and it has made no difference at all to his behaviour. He blames me for all his mistakes - I'm a BAD woman - and doesn't make ANY effort at all. Are they actually capable of realising that there is a problem? I am slowly, but surely, going MAD. HELP. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
pingu Report post Posted March 31, 2006 Hi Tyw. Firstly welcome to the forum, i can guarentee that you are not alone, we have a lot in common on this site. And whilst i cant give you any firm advice on your situation, i do know there will be people who can. Its always hard for AS people to understand 'theroy of mind' and your husband will not honestly know that his behaviour affects you, as he will have trouble seeing things from your point of view. It seems to feel like there is no 'grey areas' to situations there is only black and white, and if your ideas/suggestions are in the grey area he will not grasp them. Sorry i cant help any more than that. But welcome anyway, stay strong !! <'> <'> Shaz Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
tyw Report post Posted March 31, 2006 Thanks Shaz. I KNOW he doesn't see things as I do and most of the time I can deal with it, but it doesn't make him any easier to live with! I divorced him 3 years ago and just can't seem to make him realise this!!!! I expect I'll manage a bit longer......... Tina. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
tmf Report post Posted March 31, 2006 hello tyw and a big warm welcome to the forum <'> It's a gr8 place for a bit of help and advice!! Just wanted to say that my fiance and i beleive he has AS, yet he is undiagnosed. It can be hell sometimes, it is like having 3 kids in the house sometimes. Trying to explain in a way that they understand because they can't seem to think outside the box is really hard, especially when you do it all the time to our son who is 6 and has AS. He drives me completely insane, but i love him. He really doesn't understand me at all 1/2 the time, but i think that's why we are soo strong. We have a good partnership as well as relationship, all be it can be hard at times! I used to explode at him, but since learning about AS, and beleiving he may well have it i am not so bad (he might have something different to say on the matter mind! ) I just have to except he has his little ways and am slowly beginning to adapt to our new way of life. But i do love him and i know he loves me and thats all that matters. I don't know if that helps with your question or not, i justthought i would share what is like living with some1 who is thought to have AS. There maybe someone along soon enough that can offer you some 'actual' advice. Good luck, tmf xx Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ceecee Report post Posted March 31, 2006 (edited) Pingu I so agree with what you are saying. tyw I think it is important to keep saying to yourself he doesn't mean it, he can't help it, he is unaware of how his behaviour and the difficulties he has affects me. Easier said than done, I guess. I am sure someone will come along and give you some advice soon. I have a.s. tendancies myself and my husband will tell you it can be ###### hard work!!!But we have learnt to keep a sense of humour and work through things together. feel free to p.m. me if you need a friendly ear. <'> <'> <'> Hope things look up for you soon. Edited March 31, 2006 by ceecee Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
bid Report post Posted March 31, 2006 Hi, I've been referred to see if I have AS. Funnily enough, I could apply all of the comments in this thread to people who are NT. Bid Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
