bethlynette Report post Posted May 20, 2006 Hi all, my husband has been offered a position in SW London that would increase his salary quite a bit. We're currently living in Cambridge and we've been here for a little more than 2 years. I am just starting to get to know people here. Sam, our ds with HFA, will be 4 in July. I'm wondering what the impact would be of moving to a new town. We applied for deferred admission so that he could stay at nursery an extra year but our request was denied so he'll have to start at a different school if we stay here too. I feel moving right now would be disruptive for him, but maybe I'm attributing feelings to him that he wouldn't really have just because I myself would rather stay put. Anyone have any experience with relocation that they could share? Thanks so much! Beth Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Bagpuss Report post Posted May 20, 2006 Hi, We've relocated lots of times. Had 15 houses in 15 years when hubby and I in RAF, but this was before kids started school. Since leaving the forces, we've also relocated twice in one year, due to hubby's new job. We've been at our current town two and half years. I found our kids dealt with it in different ways. Our eldest was really upset when he had to leave the primary school he'd been at since reception, and then of course, we then had to move a second time. He's loving it where we live now, and has so much freedom he wouldn't have had a previous place. Our eldest daughter moved without a backward glance, twice, and would move again tomorrow and not care But we suspect she has Aspergers, so that could be a contributing factor. Our youngest is settled in a fantastic school, in reception, and because of her having ASD and DMD, this would make me think long and hard about disrupting her. Our son is now at secondary school, and again, this would definately make me think twice about a move. Really is a personal decision, and depends on what you will gain or lose by moving, weighing up the pros and cons etc. Sorry I couldn't be of more help. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Flora Report post Posted May 20, 2006 Since having the children we've relocated 6 times. By the time my dd started year 2 she'd been to 4 different schools and 3 different education systems; Scotland, England then American and then back to England again at the start of year 2 (she should have been in year 3 but all the changes meant she had to be kept back a year). When they started school back in England after living in the states Susie was really happy and made friends straight away, it didn't seem to affect her to any great degree; William was another matter, and reacted very strangely, of course we had no idea of his dx. The last move, which was two years ago was a big mistake. DD was 11, William coming up for 10 and Luke was 6. I had to change the boys' school after 6 weeks because the first one caused them all sorts of problems. The second school hasn't been much better but not to the extent of the first one. My dd was very very unhappy for a long time after we moved and lost all her confidence. She is only just starting to recover from it after 2 1/2 years! I think you can see a pattern here, that younger children without problems are easier with relocation than children with ASD's and older children. At the moment you are your son's whole life and unless he is entrenched with lots of friends I don't think moving will be such a tragedy. I would plan ahead though because moving them when they are older is a killer. I asked our consultant about moving the last time, if he thought it was something I shouldn't do and he basically told me that we are doing them no favours by protecting them from change. Looking back I totally disagree with him unless he's talking about a different route to the shops! This is all just my experience, and yours may be totally different. Good luck with your decisions. Lauren Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
kaz Report post Posted May 21, 2006 Hi, I move my children 240 miles 2 years ago from the only place they had ever lived in. Daniel was 12 at the time. I talked to them alot about the move before it happened and they where involved in every aspect of the move as well. Because Daniel already had his statment the LEA where very helpful in just what schools in the area would be the best for him, and we bought our new home in the area for the school I thought would be best suited to his needs. I have got to say in our case the move was one of the best things we could have done. It gave Daniel a fresh start he was no longer with the children who he had been with since he was 3, so the move took away all the hassle that brings ( peers no longer knowing just what to do to get him upset) It took a few months for everyone to settle in the 2 girls as well as Daniel, but i do think that picking the right school for my son to go to was the biggest thing in making the move so successful. Daniel has improved leaps and bounds since the move we still have our bad time, but i have to say that they are now out numbered by the good times. Saying all that i do know that i would not like to move them all over again. I hope that you move goes as smothly as our, it takes a lot of work before hand but in our cast that just made everything better. Hope this helps, Karen Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
bethlynette Report post Posted May 22, 2006 Hi Bagpuss, Lauren, and Karen, thanks so much for your replies. It sounds like maybe kids with ASD aren't really that different from kids without in terms of relocation. But those were good tips about trying to think about where we want to be in five years/ trying to liase with the LEA (although that seems a bit tricky... ). We haven't fully decided what to do but it's good to hear about your experiences. Thanks! Beth Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
