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KarenT

Football

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Me again. Still dotting I's and crossing T's in preparation for J's forthcoming assessment.

 

Football this time. J claims to love football. Goes to weekly training session (he's lousy at it but thinks he's great), has filled out his sticker book for the World Cup, says he supports Brazil and likes wearing his Ronaldinho strip, also has a Van Nistelrooy one, never takes off his goalie gloves while at training. Has been VERY excited for the World Cup, reading his WC history book often etc etc you get the picture.

 

Yet when it's time to watch a match it all goes wrong. He can't sit to watch for more than a few minutes, and that's pushing it, pinballs around the room instead, bouncing off the furniture. Yesterday he sat in his England shirt and read the Beano instead. Gets confused about who's playing in which direction, can't tell who's got a corner or a free kick, gets utterly mixed up by the rules. Shouts out supporter-type chants (last night it was "Come on the whites" - which nobody ever says), seems to have no idea how to be involved in watching. Even at urgent moments, such as a free kick that might result in a goal, he's usually oblivious even when he's told that it's an exciting time and he should watch. Sometimes he will watch the replay deadpan, while dh and I are excitedly saying "Yay, Beckham scored!" or something, and J's looking nonplussed and asking who scored and was it an own goal. Dh and I explain the action frequently in an effort to involve him but he doesn't seem to get it.

 

After the game it's a mad dash to the score chart he has on the wall to fill in the results and work out who plays who next. Has regular looks at it while the match is on too, to look at facts about the teams.

 

What I want to ask is... does this seem usual for a boy of seven and a half? I can remember as a child the whole house going footie crazy on FA Cup Final day and although I wasn't particularly interested in football generally I still joined in with the fun, I knew what was happening and kept up with the scores, that kind of thing. I also recall times when I've been in other people's homes when their children have been watching football on tv and their interest and involvement were completely different from J's, even in much younger children.

 

Are there any of your children who are footie fans of similar age to J, and how are they handling the World Cup? Just looking for comparisons, anything you can share will help.

 

Ta (again!) and thanks for indulging me!

 

Karen

x

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M is slightly younger than your son as he's 6.

 

He claims to love football. He collected all the football stickers and cards and obsessed over them for weeks and weeks. He says he plays football at school.

 

However, he hasn't a clue about the rules of football and argues with the kids even though he has no idea how a game of football should be played. He has been getting into trouble at school recently at lunch and we found out the kids play football and as he can't approach them he nicks the ball and runs off with it, they then fight him for it. This is M's idea of joining in! He doesn't understand football but I think likes the concept of liking it, if you get what I mean.

 

He hasn't watched a game on Tv and won't. he has no interest. But he has asked hubby to explain to him how to play football. Difficult though to explain to a kid who believes he knows everything.

 

I don't think your son is unusual as far as kids on the spectrum go. He probably enjoys collecting the cards as it is a collection thing and may enjoy reading the statistics but not actually watching it.

 

mum22boys

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karen t it is like reading about my 2 they have always played footy (nearly 10 now) love it would play it till the cows come home,same as you when it comes to watching a match cannot sit at peace jump up and down go upstairs an downstairs for the whole 90mins then asked what happened,their da is a big footy fan an often goes away to watch matches but will not take them with him till they can sit at peace,an often at school will get into trouble as they argue with everybody about the rules often end up in fights with boys at school because of it an are obsessed with collecting the cards so much so i will become a life member of panini on the web site ordering the blooming things haha. i decided to let them join a local team when they were bout 6 explained to the coach what they were like an probs they had (no diagnosis) but they have been great with them an they have come on a treat so much so this is their 4th year of doing it and to be honest i dont mind it keeps them out of trouble haha when they are at footy they never ever show much signs of their aspies they seem to keep it well hidden probably dont want to stand out in the crowd so to speak hope this helps keep smilin luv karin :D:D:D

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Thanks for both replies.

 

I agree with you, mum22boys, that J's behaviour is normal for the spectrum, but I doubt it's normal for 'normal' IYKWIM. Just wanted to know whether I should include it in my notes for the assessment. I think it probably has some relevance.

 

Karin, great that your boys are able to control their AS for football practice. J's a nightmare at his but the coach is great(we've tried a few others without success), has an interest in special needs and will let J referee if he's having a tough time, lets him tidy up afterwards and put the kit in the cupboards. J takes him one of my chocolate muffins every week - last week he stopped in the middle of a match and shouted up to the spectator gallery "Mam! Have you got Mark's cake?". It must have suddenly occurred to him and he couldn't continue until he knew - bless!

 

Thanks again. Keep 'em coming if you have more experiences to share.

 

Karen

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T is 7 and hs shown no interest in football at all! My nephew on the other hand (NT) is 13 and absolutely besotted with football all year round. Having said that, his 9yr old brother (NT) shows no interest in football.

 

The 13yr old lad kicks the ball round and tries to get my son T involved but he can't play by the rules and doesn't understand that it is just a 'game'.

 

I on the other hand am football crazy and sat through yesterday's game with T bouncing off the walls, hanging upside down on the sofa, irritating me and the dog and basically had swarms of ants in his pants. Oh how I would just love to share watching a game of football, a bottle of pop and crisps with my son. :crying:

 

Still, maybe when he's older?? :pray:

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my 10 yr old is totally, 100 percent NOT interested in football, playing or watching!!

Lisa

tho he did say he wanted to watch it so he could talk about it when the other kids were!

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And just to prove a point...

 

Monday night is football night, so I've cooked J's tea straight from school (as usual) and told him that if he eats his tea quickly then gets into his football kit quickly, he'll get some time watching the Italy/Aussie atch. He managed to eat fairly well, only a few prods in the right direction from me and the timer, then ran upstairs to put on his Ronaldinho kit... and spent the next half an hour bouncing on the bed while playing Laura by the Scissor Sisters over and over and over again. He's downstairs again now, arguing with Dad that the Aussies are playing in the wrong direction and flying an Imperial Starship at the tv screen. Ho hum.

 

Karen

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Hi my son is 7 in the summer he has said he likes playing football in the playground at school but I've heard he is just generally chasing whoever has the ball :( At the last school book fair he got a world cup book and chart and I didn't hear the end of it right up until the WC started now I've tried putting matches on for him and he's been at my parents with my dad and brother watching it but I think he has glanced at the screen like twice in all that time. I have to say I'm less than enthusiastic about footie though I used to love it my ex's obession with it put me off completely.

I have enrolled my S in a football taster week where he will have 1 hr a day mon-fri football coaching with 5-8 yr olds in august its a free coaching thing and luckily a family support worker had just arrived on our doorsteps, 2 years after asking for referral to get help with play activities, and so she has organised a link worker to attend these training sessions with him. Thing is I'm worried the whole experience may put him off the only sport he has ever shown any interest in because when me or my brother have tried to have a kick about with him he always picks up the ball after about 2 kicks. He does have a strong kick even though he has low muscle tone and he can kick it where he wants it to go but I just think he can't decide where that might be.

 

anyway it sounds like a similar case of interested in everything but watching the game!

its so good to know we're not alone

Lorraine

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tom is exactly the same he sits on our bed, the only place big enough for all his charts, books with statistics etc and fills them in while watching the match occassionally.

 

i think he loves the whole score, who scored, line ups thingy etc. its charts and stuff he loves i think not the football. he used to play for a team but they only ever trained him never played him so he left, but hes not good at it he just loves kicking the ball around.

 

hey ho, suppose it could be worse!

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Me again Karen!

It reminds me a bit of G's new Starwars obsession - loves it, googles starwars images, talks about it constantly, plays the game on the playstation (far too much but it's now his reward for going into school without a fuss) so daddy borrowed the starwars film for them to watch.

 

He liked the idea of watching it but could he actually sit down and watch it! He talked and wandered off, played etc and in the end C turned the film off.

 

Dunno if it's relevant or not but the footie thing did remind me of it :)

 

Sounds like he likes the idea more than the actual thing - could he be maybe trying to fit in at school.

 

G has absolutely no interest in footie even though all the other boys are taking their balls to school atm.

 

Off now to try and remove him from the PS!

Edited by jlp

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Hi,

 

Kai is 7 1/2 and he's not interested in football at all. When my neighbours shout excitedly during matches, he goes in the garden and screams, "Shut up!".

 

The only part he likes are the flags, because he's really into which country has which flag (he knows them all).

 

We watched a match the other day because he decided it was "cool". Afterwards he said, "Who won that game then mummy?". :wacko:

 

If you asked him who Beckham is, he wouldn't have a clue. TBH though, i'm glad he's different and not just a "sheep".

 

Loulou x

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My first thought was the same as one of jlp's points - maybe he's not interested in football at all, rather he's trying to pretend to be 'normal'. With all the hype and hoohah around the world cup it's a very brave kid (or adult) who will admit to finding it as interesting as the hexidecimal numbering system for digital colours.

 

A major part of the WC is the tribalism that is reinforced with it - who's side are you on? As AS is, to a large part, a social communication problem such an obvious social demand ("support our team!") is easy to fake, and being able to reel off the statistics can get you into accepted the group more easily than with most 'hidden' social demands.

Watching the game, however is a waste of two hours that could be spent doing something fun instead.

 

just a thought :whistle:

 

nemo

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I met a young man, saying that as he's 15 and about 6ft tall, a while ago. Another boy on the spectrum and his knowledge on football was incredible. He could tell you who played for what team, inc very low division teams going back to at least the 80s. Who they played, what the scores were, what they won, where they were in the league. Some clubs even earlier. He watched football games where we were constantly pointing out where they were going wrong and the referee was wrong. I just stood there gob smacked.

Edited by lil_me

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Luke is very much the same.

 

He's got the t-shirt, the book and the chart which he keeps up to date. He hasn't watched a single game though apart from 15 minutes of the very first match. Last year I bought him football boots and he joined a club down the road; he went once and had refused to go back since.

 

I'm totally convinced it's a quest to 'fit in'.

 

Lauren

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My first thought was the same as one of jlp's points - maybe he's not interested in football at all, rather he's trying to pretend to be 'normal'. With all the hype and hoohah around the world cup it's a very brave kid (or adult) who will admit to finding it as interesting as the hexidecimal numbering system for digital colours.

 

A major part of the WC is the tribalism that is reinforced with it - who's side are you on? As AS is, to a large part, a social communication problem such an obvious social demand ("support our team!") is easy to fake, and being able to reel off the statistics can get you into accepted the group more easily than with most 'hidden' social demands.

Watching the game, however is a waste of two hours that could be spent doing something fun instead.

Thanks Nemo. Don't think it's a 'fitting in' thing for J though as he's been going to footie training for three years now and loves it - as I said at the beginning of this thread, he thinks he's great at it but he's terrible, which is quite a shame. He also tries to join in playground football games (hayfever permitting - he's been indoors for the last three weeks :tearful: ) but like others he has little idea of how to actually play the game in practice so he gets left out because nobody will pass to him.

 

Also, his allegiance is always different to his peers. Like TheNeil, J's an ardent Brazil supporter and will argue blind that they're going to win while all around him are yelling for England. Having said that, he's bandwagon-hopped to Argentina in the past couple of days... He seems to have a need to be different, so temporarily conforming during WC isn't part of the equation for J. His is a genuine interest, but as jlp says it's more of liking the idea than the thing itself.

 

Ah well, onwards and upwards. Thanks for replies, folks.

 

Karen

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We have been trying to get our boy(asp)interested in the footy in an attempt to help him have something'normal' with the others at school.He loves his shirt,well it is red his fav colour.We have the chart up but Dads more interested in it ,so he fills it in.Matt prefers to play Lego football on the pc durring the actual matchs than to watch it! He wants England to win but I think thats cos its where he lives!!!

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My son (AS 9) loves football, he plays for a team but if he doesn't perform well enough (in his view) he will cry for hours afterwards. He also has a season ticket for Spurs and goes with his dad. He sits and watches intently, shows no emotion unless the team he thinks should win starts to lose! He knows league positions and works out who should win and gets really upset if things don't work out according to his plan. He has no loyalty to Spurs if he thinks they should lose.

He's watched some of the world cup but can't sit still for long, as with you he wants to fill in the wall chart.

I think he enjoys it just for the facts- who's the tallest/oldest player etc. Most of the time it keeps him happy. :lol:

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Hi, another non football comparison, my dd(3)s "area of interest" is animals, but can you get her to look at the TV when something we think would interest her is on???NO. We're going, "oh look at that "I" what a cute....," she's busy reading a book or flapping her caterpillar toy! :rolleyes:

If she asks for an animal DVD on or spots a clip herself she will watch it awhile, then wanders, does other things but complains if you turn it off thinking she's not watching it :rolleyes:

Don't you love 'em! :P

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My son decided one day that he loved football, came as a suprise as up to that moment he had never even seen a match on tv. My brother in law took him to a match and from that moment he was an avid PNE fan.

 

I have to say that i dreaded the world cup, he was soooo certain that England would win and when they lost he was devastated. So i got some info on the world cup and now he could tell you who won the world cup and when, who scored the goals, the players names etc..... and incidently he says he WILL play for England one day, as their goalie. hehehe bless

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I met a young man, saying that as he's 15 and about 6ft tall, a while ago. Another boy on the spectrum and his knowledge on football was incredible. He could tell you who played for what team, inc very low division teams going back to at least the 80s. Who they played, what the scores were, what they won, where they were in the league. Some clubs even earlier. He watched football games where we were constantly pointing out where they were going wrong and the referee was wrong. I just stood there gob smacked.

 

 

My lewis is like that now kirk who's no DX goes with them all to watch rovers and mark my partner says he'd never seen just 1 person sat there while 23.000 people where cheering kirk said whats going on !!!! poor mite trys to get involved but he's all fingers and toes :huh:

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I work with a year 4 class as a TA. Every break and lunch time the boys rush off to play football. They all supported England and wore football strip etc. However when asked if they watched any matches I was astonished to find that most of them hadnt or had watched a bit. When asked to name the squad the only two players mentioned were Mr Rooney and his friend Mr Beckham.

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I'm totally the same with regards anything. I go out and buy all the things I need to start a hobby then do absolutely nothing whatsoever about it!!!! I have literally loads of things lying about that have never been used; painting kits; various bits of sports equipment; books I've bought in the moment and have never read, I got them because I liked the font used or the cover designs!!!!; loads of charity wristbands that are still sealed up because again, I liked the colours of them; the list goes on.

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