Does anyone have more than one child with AS?

[tabz2711]

Whilst reading posts I have noticed that a fair few of you have more than one child with AS and I wanted to know how common is it to have more than one in your own family with AS.

 

The light bulb as been turned on since going ahead with trying to get "S" DX with AS and I think that my third daughter has also got a lot of the AS traits but she is very different from S in many ways. S hates her and I wonder if its because they are similar in some ways.

 

We put M behaviour down to being jealous when our son was born as she seemed to become more difficult then. She is very jealous and doesn't seem to understand that we spend more money on her than anyone and she really creates when I buy anyone else something.

She has a full sized blanket that she is addicted to and carries it around with her and sniffs it continuously, if she has to leave it for a while she makes sure she has a real big sniff to keep her going.

 

She has always had acute hearing and complained that things are too loud but needed a hearing test when she was a baby because she failed two.

 

M is totally disorganised and her bedroom is a tip even when I have blitzed it, the next day its awful again. She is very funny about germs and has to have her own spoon and her own bowl for cereal but is not very good about personal hygiene and as a family we all shower daily and have clean clothes every day. I have to check in the washing basket to make sure she has changed her pants daily and shower daily. She will tell me she has had a shower but I don't hear any water when she is in the bathroom.

 

She again doesn't hug and if we ask her for a kiss she putss her cheek there to be kissed.

 

M also taps all the time with her fingers on doors, cupboards in fact everything it drives us insane.

sorry to go on but it has only just clicked about M. She can come out with very embarrassing things to others, i.e ask her cousin whether she washed her face because she has spots and laughs at things that we don't find funny.

M gets very upset if she things she might get into trouble at school and won't do anything wrong at school but will at home. She goes mad if she is late but she is happy to make anyone else late.

 

I am quite shocked and upset to think that M might have AS as well but it would explain her behaviour, should I mention it at S CAHMS appointment in a couple of weeks?

I will mention me another time lol.

 

What does NT mean Please

 

S*

Edited July 4, 2006 by tabz2711

[lancelot]

Hi there,

I only have the one officially diagnosed, but 'concerns' being raised at Preschool about the little one. I'm sure they wouldn't have been rasied without C's diagnosis.

 

M is the same child whether she has AS or not. If treating her as though she has AS helps to understand her, though, I'd do just that -- explain clearly, be specific, put up lists and timetables... I felt a right idiot putting up one that included 'washing' and 'clean pants', but it does help all three children!

I know what you mean about the shock, but it's not very logical (or so I keep telling myself). After all, if it's never seemed a problem before, it probably hasn't been a problem.

 

Oh, and I suspect it explains a lot about me, too!

[jb1964]

Hi Tabz,

 

Obviously as children get older you get used to their ways and their behaviour becomes just part and parcel of who they are. It wasn't until my daughter started to get to around 9-10yrs that I started to think that she really shouldn't be doing that or she should understand that by now - things I had been putting down to her health etc - there always seemed to be a justification for it up until a point where I started to think I must be a really bad parent.

 

Things rolled along terribly until she started comp - when all of a sudden everything hit us like a ton of bricks and now I have been made aware everything has fallen into place - and the CPN/Psych.Cons. both told us that from 11-16 once they start comp/puberty things are so difficult for them, anxieties become worse/meltdowns are worse and depression on top.

 

I'm assuming at 12 she's started comp - how is she coping there? - do you think things are getting noticably worse?

 

I guess I'm trying to say that if she has AS there is every possibility that this transition period is going to be extremely difficult for her - and for that reason alone I would mention it to CAHMS.

 

Take care,

Jb

Edited July 4, 2006 by jb1964

[tabz2711]

Hi there,

I only have the one officially diagnosed, but 'concerns' being raised at Preschool about the little one. I'm sure they wouldn't have been rasied without C's diagnosis.

 

M is the same child whether she has AS or not. If treating her as though she has AS helps to understand her, though, I'd do just that -- explain clearly, be specific, put up lists and timetables... I felt a right idiot putting up one that included 'washing' and 'clean pants', but it does help all three children!

I know what you mean about the shock, but it's not very logical (or so I keep telling myself). After all, if it's never seemed a problem before, it probably hasn't been a problem.

 

Oh, and I suspect it explains a lot about me, too!

 

Thanks for your sound advice, I think I will treat her like she has AS until proven not. Her behaviour has been more of a problem over the past four years and I have questioned myself many times on parenting skills, but my first born and last born are totally different, easy well mannered, thougthful and very sociable and even my little foster daughter who came with so many behavioural problems has come on in leaps and bounds with the parenting I use. I usually foster children who are unadoptable when they arrive because of their behaviour and when they leave me they go to an adoptive placement. So how can I be clued up with the rest and not with S and M?

S*

[tabz2711]

Hi Tabz,

 

Obviously as children get older you get used to their ways and their behaviour becomes just part and parcel of who they are. It wasn't until my daughter started to get to around 9-10yrs that I started to think that she really shouldn't be doing that or she should understand that by now - things I had been putting down to her health etc - there always seemed to be a justification for it up until a point where I started to think I must be a really bad parent.

 

Things rolled along terribly until she started comp - when all of a sudden everything hit us like a ton of bricks and now I have been made aware everything has fallen into place - and the CPN/Psych.Cons. both told us that from 11-16 once they start comp/puberty things are so difficult for them, anxieties become worse/meltdowns are worse and depression on top.

 

I'm assuming at 12 she's started comp - how is she coping there? - do you think things are getting noticably worse?

 

I guess I'm trying to say that if she has AS there is every possibility that this transition period is going to be extremely difficult for her - and for that reason alone I would mention it to CAHMS.

 

Take care,

Jb

Hi Jb

thanks for your post, it makes sense about my 12yr old then, she seems to be getting worse and we always had an excuse for her behaviour, but no more excuses now

 

Somethings have not helped like her going to Rythmic gymnastics, the teachers were so strict she was scared and worried about doing the wrong thing, her behaviour improved when she left and went to dancing instead which is much more relaxed.

 

She has always struggled with friends and went to her new school on her own as it is out of area. She has not got the organisational skills for homework and frequently is phoning friends to ask what the home work is.

S*

[Daisydot]

Both my children have diagnosis of ASD although they are both very different. I do know a few other families with more than one ASD diagnosis and families where one child is affected and the others do not appear to be.

 

Best wishes

Daisydot

[Kathryn]

What does NT mean Please

 

Hi Tabz,

 

NT= neurotypical: i.e. someone who isn't on the autistic spectrum.

 

I can understand that the possibliity of having another child on the spectrum is difficult to contemplate at the moment but I would agree that it's worth mentioning at your next CAMHS appointment - although your priority at the moment is obviously to get S the help that she needs.

 

My 9 year old son definitely has a few traits, I think these are mainly physical - he has many repetitive movements and I think he's slightly dyspraxic.

 

K x

[Fionamg]

Hi

 

I have two children with AS and I know plenty of families with two children affected. I know one family where all five children are affected to some degree and the father has been diagnosed too. His brother's family are also badly affected with all three children affected. I know another family with three children with AS/language disorders. Girls are often harder to diagnose and get diagnosed later than boys.

 

Fiona

[Kazzen161]

My eldest son was dx with AS about 10 years ago. My youngest was dx when he was about 10. We went to a psychiatrist because he was depressed, and he said "do you think he has AS?" and at first I thougth "no", but after thinking about it there were lots of subtle signs. A lot of his AS is not noticeable at home, because we live in an AS friendly household, but he had various problems at school.

 

Both of my AS sons hate washing/showering, whereas my NT son would be in the bathroom all the time!

 

Karen

[joshanddanfans]

hi i have 3 children 2 boys 6 and 5 and 2 year old girl. 6 year old is dx asd,adhd,dyspraxia, sensory integration dysfunction. second child being dx in 2 days time, has more severe problems. my little girl is already showing some signs, so i would say yes it does run in families but is rare.

[mossgrove]

We have four children, two Autistic, two NT.

 

Having 2 children on the spectrum has it's positives. Making and sustaining friendships can be a real problem for children on the spectrum. Our two Autistic bouys are genuine best friends and on the same wavelength much of the time.Growing up would be so march harder for either of them if they were the only Autistic child in the family.

 

I see them as different, NOT as badly affected.

 

Simon

[Anneuk]

For some time I had suspicians that my 8rl old has AS too.

 

She is very erm how can i say it... she doesn't seem to care about many things, like if i was to ground her she just accepts it, when she does get upset she is totally OTT but their doesn't seem to be anything behind it.. no real emotion if you get what I mean.

 

Unlike my eldest diagnosed Aspie she has walked on her tiptoes for years and only recently as she finally got to a specialist about this. My daughter also wees herself a lot, not just at bedtime but often is damp in the day time.

 

When i took her for an assessment about her walking on tiptoes the Orthopaedic doc told me he thinks its not AS but that she was maybe a missed mild cerebral Palsy... She is now having extensive physsio to lengthen her achilles and pelvic tendons and has to go back in plaster in two weeks to straightern her feet some more.

 

I am waiting for a paed to see her, as Although some of it fits with Cerebral Palsy, some of it also fits with AS so I am interested as to what will finally pan out.

 

Someone did mention copying my Aspies behaviour, but the traits I think she has are ones that my diagnosed aspie doesn't have, and the ones they do share are not the obvious ones such as the stiff cuddles and the empty kisses.

 

Anne