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denny

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Posts posted by denny

  1. Posted · Report reply

    hi, er have the same with our son, we are sure as he is understanding AS he is starting to play on it, we feel that itis positive that he wants to know more and we have never hidden anything from him, he has told a couple of friends that he has AS which is all positive as it shows that he isn;t embarrassed about being as he calls it special. I think we will carry on just answering the questions when they come up, he will always let us know when he whats to know more.

  3. Posted · Edited by denny · Report reply

    we have had a meeting with the head teacher today and thomas's teacher, also the teacher he will be going up to next school year, it was a really positive meeting and they are putting alot of stratagies into place including getting someone that he can go to first thing in the morning when i leave him which is the worse time, they have also talked about the six week counselling you talked about, so i think the school are doing as much as they can at this stage, and we felt as if we had alot of support from them , they are setting up safe places for him to go and sit if it gets to much for him.

    so thankfully i feel everything is being done for us at this stage, and we are still waiting on our appointment with the psycologist.

    itis the weekend now so we are just going to try and enjoy it,and not think about monday until we have to,

    thanks for everybodies help, it has really helped knowing that there are people out there who can help

     

    Denise

  4. Posted · Report reply

    i found your letter really interesting , as today we had thw worst day possible day which resulted in us going to pick him up from school literally minutes after we dropped him off and we have to see the head teacher tomorrow to put a plan in motion,this was the worst we have ever seen him, but when we picked him up it was as if nothing had happened , he just sat in the car chatting whilst i was in tears at the side of him.

    I too would be interested in what the minumum age is of when he could have CBT, i do realise that this isn't a magic wand and every child is different, what may work for one child may not work for another.

    Do you have to be refered by your GP or can you go privately as we would give anything a try.

     

    Denise

  5. Posted · Report reply

    we have been to see the senco today, she couldn't offer any solutions as we have already tried them, but we did ask if she could contact the ASD outreach team { which i only found out from this forum} to see if they had any solutions,she said that it wouldnt be worth statementing him as he probably wouldn't get any more help as in the classroom he gets on with his work and isn't disruptive,so we will have to carry on until we get to see the psycologist.

     

    Denise

  7. Posted · Edited by denny · Report reply

    thanks for your reply, we have tried the social stories, but they do not work, my son hasn't been statemented because we didn't think he needed to be, we have been really lucky and haven't had any major problems with him until now, we have had the usual problems but nothing like this, that is probably why it has hit us so hard.

    we have a really good camhs team and they are refering us to a child pycologist, so hopefully won't have to wait to long, and i am going to see the school senco tomorrow, so hopefully between us we can help him,

     

    would the senco have all the information about the autism advisory teacher as i didn't know about them.

    we have tried talking to him about school but all he says is that he doesn't want to leave me and that school is boring even the things we know he likes doing, he has even counted how many hours he is away from me and how far, so if i go anywhere i have to keep it quiet as he says that i am even further away,which distresses him even more.

    talking to a friend who has am 18yr old with AS and who has been through it, she said that her son tended to get worse around the ages of 7=8 and upwards, as they are able to assert themselves more, i don't know if this is true or not, and this is a sign of things to come.

    again thanks

    Denise

  8. Posted · Report reply

    hi, i am big problems with my 8yr old son who has AS, he has never liked going to school but has tolerated it,the problem is that we had the school holidays then went on holiday for 2 1/2 weeks, and ever since we came back he has refused it go anywhere without me,and going to school is a nightmare, every day he always has something wrong with him which we know is put on, itis just a ploy to get out of school, then when we get to school it takes at least 10 mins to get him out of the car, once we have acheived this we get to his classroom which he is like a clamp round my waist and has to be prised off me,all the time he is crying. as you can guess this is very disressing for both my son and me, we have tried all tactics being nice ,calm and resonable to being really hard on him, briberary, charts you name it we have tried it,

    we were just wondering if anybody out there could give us some advice on where to go next

    thanks

    Denise

  9. Posted · Report reply

    hi, i to am married to a undiagnosed AS , it can be very challenging at times but we have been married now for 13 years, and have had our problems, but he wouldn't be the person i married if he didn't have his strange ways ,but i found the more i learnt about aspergers the better i was able to handle different situations, like if i am feeling down ,alot of the time he doesn't seem to notice or know that all i need is hug, so now i ask for a hug, itis all about having different stagergies,but there is alot of information and help out there. i also have a son who has been diagnoised as having AS which makes for a interesting family life, but i wouldn't have it any other way,(maybe sometimes)

     

    hope everything goes well for you

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

  10. Posted · Report reply

    Hi Denny,

     

    I am going through a similar situation. Our youngest son age 7 was diagnosed with ADHD in Nov 08. At this time his dad started to identify with a lot of his traits. Nathan's consultant then advised us that Nathan may also have AS. The assessment for this unfortunately takes 1 year but at least Nathan is now on the waiting list. In the midst of all this though Roy ( Nathan's dad) has had a complete breakdown and is still adjusting to his medication. When I mentioned this, and all Roy's quirky traits, anger bursts etc.. to Nath's consultant he said it was possible Roy may also have AS.

    We went to Roy's GP who thankfully agreed to refer him to the Liverpool Asperger's Adult Team. We are v lucky living in this postcode. It is one of the few adult AS units in the uk. They have already been out to do an "intake assessment" for Roy and agreed that he could undergo the full detailed diagnosis criteria. He has already had the appointment through. They are coming to our house on 20th Aug.

     

    If you haven't got any access to this type of adult service then it is v difficult. We spent a lot of time before finding out about Roy potentially having AS "batting our heads against a brick wall" :wallbash: Nobody has shown any understanding of Roy other than the Dr from the adult AS team.

     

    Good luck...and look after yourself xx

    thamks you were very lucky the only way we got a referrel was that i wasn't to go out of that doctors room until he referred us, it took me about 3/4s hour but hopefully it will be worth it , it didn't take long for our son to be diagnoised, so hope we are in a good area,my husband just went to peices and to see him (he is 6'' 5'' tall)in that doctors chair loking so small and fragile was heartbreaking, he is alot better now it was just the realism that he might have it, as he said he thought other people had the problem but he now realises that itis him,so itis walking around on alot of broken eggshells but we will get through it.you just don't realise what real stress is untill you have to cope with things like this

     

  11. Posted · Report reply

    The NAS can give you a list of private specialists in your area.

     

    I had an NHS referral, but it took nearly 2 years from when the idea that I might have AS was raised to finally going to a specialist clinic.

     

    Just to be prepared that your DH may not have a very good experience with your local mental health team before being referred to a specialist in adult ASD dx.

     

    HTH

     

    Bid :)

    just got back from the doctors, what an experience, we saw a doctor who was so patronising,straight out out med school, after arguing our point he finally said that he would refer us, so we will wait and see how long it takes,

    thanks for all your help

  12. Posted · Report reply

    Denise,

    It is sometimes possible to get an NHS referral, but it's a bit of a 'postcode lottery' and often takes forever.

    Private diagnosis isn't that easy to find either - often involves a long journey to a specialist, and it can cost anything between £400 and £1000 in the UK last time I looked, but it's quicker.

    I went private for mine, and got an appointment in only two weeks, whereas the NHS would have taken up to 18 months.

    thanks, we have an appointment with the doctor this afternoon,so hope we are in the right postcode, if not we will be going down the private route, as my husband is so screwed up over not knowing,

  13. Posted · Report reply

    hi, i dont know if anyone can help, i have just got a diagnois for my son, but my question is about my husband we thought his little quirks and ways were just him, but the more we have got to know about Aspergers through our son, the more i am convinced that my husband has got it as well, and he is starting to question himself as well and things are all clicking into place for him,which is making him very unsettled as you can imagine.

    my question is how easy isit to get a diagnois for an adult and will we be able to get it done on th nhs or will we have to go down the private route.

    if anybody can help me i would be very grateful

     

    thanks

    denise

  14. Posted · Report reply

    hi, iknow what you are going through, my son is currently being assessed for AS ,but there is no doubt he has it, it is avery emotional time , but i have a friend with a 16yr old with AS and i have seen the progess he has made both socially and temerment ,my friend has been through hell with her son at times but the good times outweigh the bad and she is so proud of him now, which gives me an awful lot of hope where my son is concerned,although i am worrird about his future and about him being bullied , i am fairly optomistic on his future especially after reading about older people with AS and what they have achieved, so i hope you can stay positive and realise with support nothing is impossible

    also the more i know bout this condition i realise that my husband has quite strong traits and hearing what he was like as a child but we put up with his odd behavior and he is a sucess in his job which is quite high powered, nd he wouldnt be the person he is without it.

    so good luck for the future

  15. Posted · Report reply

    I understand the waves of emotion involved. Trying to get a diagnosis and undersand what is going on is a real energy drainer, let alone then trying to explain it all to others, expecially siblings. BUT the fact that you are on this forum means you will always have someone who will understand.

     

    itis just good to talk to people who have been and are in the same situation as us it makes a difference.

  16. Posted · Report reply

    Hi Denise and welcome :thumbs:

     

    I have a book called 'My Brother is Different', by Louise Gorrod. It came from the National Autistic Society website - here's a link : NAS

     

    It is written as if from the sibling's view, and touches on the things which make an autistic child different and why he does the things he does.

     

    It helped my elder son to understand his brother a little better. I'm sure there are other books available, depending on your daughter's age and the outcome of your son's assessment.

     

    I hope that helps, and I'm sure you won't feel so alone now you've found us >:D<<'>

     

    Nicky x

     

    thanks i will look it up, it just feels good to talk to people in the same situation

     

    Denise

  17. Posted · Report reply

    It is hard to help you other children understand why there are differneces. We tell our younger daughter it is okay that she forgets to handle our eldest with kid gloves and that we understand it is hard for her when her sister screams at her for looking at her or when she tries to be loving and give her a hug. We remind her that her sister doesn't always know that she is responding agressively and that she isn't trying to hurt her feelings (although sometimes sisters are just SISTERS :lol: ) we tried to exlain that her siters brain doesn't work in the same way as hers and that what might be very obvious to her needs explaining to her sister and sometimes it may feel that she gets all the attention but we love them both and are trying to keep a happy calm household. I can only hope that making sure she knows she can talk about how shes feeling and our explanations make her feel better about it all.

     

    Good luck with it all.

     

    thank you, it all seems to be very emotional at the moment,but we will try and explain it to her

    Denise

  18. Posted · Report reply

    Hi denny Welcome to the Forum. :)

    There is a book called ''Can I tell you about Asperger's Syndrome '' by Jude Welton that explains Asperger's Syndrome in a way that a 9 year old would probably relate to.It might be worth looking up.Karen.

     

    thanks i will look it up.

    Denise

  19. Posted · Report reply

    ]hi

    my name is denise,am married with 2 children, 1 daughter with no problems and a son who is 6 who is going through the process of being assessed for AS, but as you know this all takes time, and we feel we are left on our own without any support or advice on how to deal with his moods and emotions and at times you feel as if you are on your own, especally as my daughter feels and i know we treat her differently but itis knowing what to tell her without frightening her,i have found this site helpful in knowing that other people are going through the same if not worse than us, you dont feel so alone as itis difficult telling people as they have never heard of AS or what it involves nd the impact on the family as your child looks like any other.

    Denise

  20. Posted · Report reply

    hi i am new to this, my 6yr old is at the moment being assesed for aspergers, it seems to take so long,my question is we have a 9yr old daughter and because of how we are handling my son is being treated differently, how do we exlain to her about his problems and that we have to treat him different, until we have a definate diagnois we havent any support or help and are dealing with him as we think is right.

    would appreciate any feedback

    thanks

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