Hi,
I would be really really grateful for your help and advice… I am feeling pretty confused and unhappy.
My son is 10 and Aspergers was first mentioned when he was back in Year 1. I have been worried about it ever since but teachers/SENCOs/Heads have said that he doesn’t have it – “he’s very engaging” is what his last SENCO told me.
At first, he seemed very very bright, he learnt his numbers and alphabet quickly and was a very precocious talker. He could recite passages from books at a very early age and used to call out the isle numbers in supermarkets. It came as a great shock to see in his Yr 2 SATS results that he was behind in everything – a whole year behind in his writing. His spelling is terrible and yet he can write the most creative, imaginative stuff. He has invented several games.
He’s recently moved to a new school and has been looked at by an Ed Pysche for the second time. The first one didn’t think he had Aspergers. The new one obviously couldn’t diagnose but said that he certainly showed many of the characteristics of Aspergers. He is registered as having SEN and is getting help with spellings, handwriting and organising his work. The Ed Pysche said that school are doing all they can and that getting a diagnosis wouldn’t really change much other than perhaps getting advice from an Autistic specialist.
I am now torn between going down the route of diagnosis or just waiting to see how things develop. I kind of feel happier thinking of his as being a bit eccentric and creative and am scared of him being labelled. But then I read that children who had had an earlier diagnosis did better in the long run. I can see that it could help us train him to be more socially aware if necessary, to understand more and of course he has secondary school looming.
He doesn’t have any extreme or problem behaviours that are not being managed. He is ok with abstract thought, has good eye contact, is ok with routine changes and understands other people’s emotions, he doesn’t have tantrums BUT, he can talk incessantly, other kids have called him weird, he can make a lot of silly, loud noises and makes strange physical movements and facial expressions, he can sometimes take things literally, has problems with loud noises, has a limited diet and has found appropriate friendships difficult. I fear that there is low level bullying going on at school – he came home yesterday with marks on his face that had been made by the board rubber. His first obsession was trains but he never ever lined them up but he did make train noises all the time. He is incredibly smiley and friendly and will talk to anyone.
I am spending hours trawling through websites, answering questionnaires and coming up with Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No. Perhaps he is borderline if that’s possible? I keep asking him test questions to try and find an answer. I am worrying 24 hours a day. I think I need to prepare myself for them actually saying that he does have it if I go down the diagnosis route.
Please can anyone give me some wisdom and advice.
Thank you,
Nora X
