RYOUNG78

On reflection I think I will wait for my friend to make contact with me. Otherwise it seems that I am always the one making the effort to maintain the friendship.

What if I still have a small crush on this friend even though I know it will never lead to anything?

I agree you need to take your time and don't rush into it. I was lucky to be able to make a few friends at Secondary School. Some I have lost touch with and a few I have kept in contact with. I have a female friend I have kept in contact with since Seconday School but I quickly realised that it would only ever be a freindship and nothing further ( we still meet up from time to time). I am now happily married to somebody I met over the Internet over 7 years ago.

Thanks for the advice it has been really helpful. I just have one further observation, it always seems to be me who has to make the contact with my friend to meet up. Should I just accept this is the way it has to be or should I wait for my friend to contact me to arrange to meet up?

Does anybody else have any views on this?

She is happy. She knows about the crush.

I should have said my wife knows I meet this friend for lunch.

I have a female friend I have known since secondary school. We both work in London and occasionally meet for lunch. My wife has never met my friend for lunch. my friend has never been invited round to our house. My friend has never invited me and my wife round to her new house although I know she has entertained a number of her other friends. I did have a crush on my friend at school but it never turned into anything. Is it me or does it seem that she only wants to be friends with me and does not want me to become involved with her other friends. My friend always seems to be friendly towards me when we occasionally meet on the train.

The friend in question is somebody I have known since Secondary School. We travel in on the same train line into London everyday (although very rarely on the same train). On a couple of occassions she has noticed me at the train station and called out my name. We meet up occassionally for lunch but I am always terified that I will meet her on the way from the car park to the train station and I cannot explain why.

Have you ever tried to avoid somebody you know (who is a friend) when you see them in the street in order to avoid a social situation?

How can you tell if somebody wants to be friends with me. Can you tell from body langauge / the way they act around me?

I am giving Facebook a miss at the moment. I think it works better for me if I don't know what my Friends are up to every second of the day.

I find meeting with friends stressful sometimes. I often run out of things to talk about.

Whenever I am doing something new or meeting a friend for lunch I always get nervous before the event. Can this be part of the condition? Can you do anything to stop it?

Thanks for the replies. My friend at work has a very different personality to me (she can be very brash) but our.friendship has grown over the years becoming stronger during the last year or so.

What does it mean if a total stranger smiles at you ?

Just to exchange some pleasant banter. She has smiled at me a few times on the train. It wouldn't lead to anything else I am married.

Any advice on how you start a conversation with somebody you do not know but see on a regular basis on a train journey, or is this not a good idea?

Thanks for all the advice. I sometimes wonder why I spend time working on my friendships with all the worry and anxiety it creates for me.

I have a work colleague who is also a friend who I have known for a long period of time. Do you think it would be a good idea to explain to her about my condition so my colleague better understands why I am the way I am and say and do the things I do?

This may sound a strange question but what is the difference between a close friendship and a best friend? Can you define what a best friend is?

Does anybody else have any views on this?

Is it a good idea to tell my close friends about my Aspergers or is that not a good idea. My concern is that if I do say something they may go off and tell other people (including some of my work colleagues) and before I know it everybody will know what I have.

Thanks for the advice. I have two friends i have known for over 10 years. The first is a girl I went to secondary school with. My other friend is a girl I have worked with for over 10 years. My concern with both friendships is that when they do eventually find a partner / or in the case of my work colleague change jobs the friendship may change or be lost?

When a friendship has lasted a long time (10 years+) does that mean it is likely to last in the longer term or is it not as straight forward as that?