am i doing wrong

[Guest flutter]

day out today for little one ( actually both lol)

i asked school to put her with someone specifically, so she knew.

comes home yesterday and tells me she with 2 girls who have be calling her names ect. and not where i thought she would be

when we got to school, they tell us she is playing with one of kids and asked to go in group with her.

we get another story from little one, she says she was friends for a bit, they kid wnadered off, and strted telling her to get lost. So i kinda think, well could be daughter perception ect.

We got her changed form groups, tis along way she is going.

had all the tears, and anger, and she seems to be ok with it all, i have a chat about not going back to a place where she will get hurt again.

then pretty darned late last nite, the mother phoens and says my daughter upset, cos M says you not want them in same group So i was good, but did say ahh but u child has been .......... we have even left guides because of it, and igot "grow up" back and she hung up!

i wnet along the road, she lives a few doors down, and knocks to talk, she ignores me. I was very good tho, only shouted thorugh door, !"all mouth and trews"

i need great wisdom, help

oh yes and school are a wee bit XX with us too nw me thinks, hubs was a bit gruff on phone to them.

ta for getting this far

X

[Klou]

Hi Flutter

 

School should get over being cross, end of term and all that so I expect that changing group after they thought they were doing the right thing by taking account of the child's wishes probably wound them up a bit. They ought to know that when a parent askes for something specifically, in the case of a special needs children then it really ought to be followed up or discussed with you first. School trips are bascially an extensiion of the classroom and however much Jonny wants to be with Frankie if that is not a good idea then someone ought to take charge!

 

Don't worry about it and if you think it necessary a brief (ie verbal) thank you to the teacher for swapping the groups/apology for gruff tone caused by anxiety over the situation should smooth things over if you are concerned about bad feeling.

 

As for the other mother she is probably just peeved because you got your own way. Let it settle down a couple of days and then either leave it becasue if she makes this much fuss you probably don't want much to do with her anyway. Or if she is supposed to be a friend you could put a note through or try to explain in person about little one's need to be somewhere safe and secure on the day out. Avoid saying her daughter did/said anything in particular and present it as you believing little one to be more suited to that group. At the end of the day kids make and break friends so frequently and they need to learn that they don't always get their way and usually for a good reason.

 

Hope it works itself out.

 

Little one's best interests need to take priority.