joanc12

Hello My son was very good at accidently forgetting his kit. The whole changing thing a part of it too I think. I don't think its the kit though. Will have to await events. Always on a learning curve with him Joan

Thank you for all your replies. My son does have some motor difficulties and is very good at refusing to do things because he doesn't want to! His statement does allow him exemption from PE but the school would like to see him partaking in some exercise - so do I. Had a meeting in school on Wednesday - the plan at present is to encourage him to stay with the class for PE. Not to kit out but assist if any odd jobs etc the Teacher wants him to do. Usually there could be another 1 -3 pupils sitting out so he will always have company. This worked on this occasion - hopefully it will again next week. My son will not openly communicate what he is thinking. Sometimes its like searching in the dark for answers. Once again, thank you. I value everyones opinion. Joan

Hello Its been awhile since I've been on the Forum. Looking for some advise. After 2 1/2 years fighting to get my son, now 14 Statemented and settled in a new much smaller mainstream school - I now have a problem with PE. My son was only diagnosed this year with ASD. He however dosen't want to know. Moving school has brought him on well and he is socialising with his peers. This has been a major improvement from school refusal in his previous school. He refuses to do PE but the school expect him to go for a walk round the school pitch during that period. To me that dosen't sound unreasonable, but to him its not an option. I don't want him to start taking a full day off for the sake of an hour. Any advice would be greatly appreciated. Worried Joan

Thank you for replying. Getting him to open up is very hard but I will keep trying. He was seen by the ASD team today which was very helpful. OT tomorrow. With their help and advise from the Forum members, I try and stay positive. I just want my son to be comfortable at school and if possible, happy. Joan

Hello My son is mid diagnosis for Asperger's and Dyspraxia. His first ASD appointment is on Tuesday next. My problem is that he is 13 years old and does not want to know about Asperger's. He is currently in 2nd year in a Grammar school. I had been pushing for my son to see the Educational Psychologist since the start of second year as he was non participating in certain subjects eg Art. PE, Music and PE. Her report was to say the least very worrying. She felt he has Dyspraxia, low self esteem. low morale and below average processing skills. His results to date this year, I would say are below what would be expected of him at this school. Has anyone any advice on how to help him accept that he needs help. He feels that there is nothing wrong with him, he doesn't need 'therapists' or help at school and that he is being made to feel like a 'retard' - his words! After another battle, he is having a Statutory Assessment. He would also need councelling for his low morale, but getting him to accept that is also difficult. Any advice would be welcome. Thank you. Joan

Hello again. I'm still on the same topic of education. I have been into the school and recording of homework has improved. However I do have an issue with Music. My son has never been able to get the knack of playing the Tin Whistle partly because in Primary School, he had the wrong notes for a long time. I know he is expected to make an effort in every class and I appreciate that but he has a class test in Music and the teacher expects him to be able to play a Fanfare and be assessed on that. He got told off today for not having learned it and is to be re tested on Wednesday! A note in his planner said he had had a week to prepare for this. In my opinion, if my son had a year to prepare, he would do no better. I have wrote a note to the teacher explaining about him not being able to play the tin whistle and would welcome any suggestions she had but ..... Am I being unreasonable about this? Did anyone come across similar issues? Art would have similar issues. Would welcome any replies. Joan

I had already decided to bypass those teachers on the next parents meeting! Glad you did the same. His form teacher is very good and is working on a positive behaviour programme. I have also asked the school to refer him to the Educational psychologist from their end to aid the diagnosis. It seems to be a very slow process with a large waiting list. I know that there is at least one other Aperger's in the school but not who they are. My son has no outside interests which is a big downfall but he does have one good friend who comes to the house regularly. I was away for a few days there and was panicking about the homework. My daughter and friend supervised for me so it was done (the recorded parts anyway!) I think he behaves better when I am away!

Thank you all for the advice. I have been into the school and asked them to help with recording the homework. I had a positive reception. Most teachers are doing just that. A few don't seem to be too interested esp French and Art! I think they are having a race to see who can give my son the most notes re homework! Getting him to do the homework is still a big issue but I feel a bit better knowing that the school is trying to put in place some constructive ideas. Also that I have support from all in the forum. Many thanks Joan

Thank you Lynne and JsMum. Will make a point of going into the school today armed with you advice. Many thanks Joan

Thank you for that. Will definitely look into it.

Hello Looking some advise re school. I live in N. Ireland. My 12yr old is not yet diagnosed but is highly probable to be Asperger's. Behavioual problems arised at end of first year at grammar school although he never really settled once moving schools. To be honest, he has always hated school but the change has certainly brought on major problems. Homework is a big issue. He never instigates homework and as a result, we could still be at homework late in the evening. Some of the homework he forgets to record in his planner which results in a negative record by that particular teacher. I do not think grammar school is the best place for him because of its "strictness" and "negativity"but until he is diagnosed, I feel totally powerless. The school are aware of the probable Asperger's and I am in contact with the SENCO. Every day however, there is some note about work not completed, no effort being made etc... There is very little positive reinforcement. If he had been picked up and diagnosed in primary school, I do not think we would have considered the grammar school an option. Has anyone had a similar problem. It could be up to a year before we get a formal diagnosis. I do not know of any quicker routes.

Thank you! It can feel very lonely at times. You want the best for your child but are at a loss how to achieve it!

Hello I have a 12yr old son who is awaiting diagnosis of Asperger's. He has just been refered to the ASD Team. Things came to a head when he changed schools last year. The waiting is the worst as we want to be able to get him the help he needs and are unsure he is at the most appropriate school. Glad to find this forum as only beginning to gather up all the information I can.