Lilypad

My son currently is on a very long ASD waiting list and I am in a sort of limbo because he hasn't been diagnosed with anything yet. He is almost 8 but I feel like he never grew out of the 'terrible twos'. Today was the worst example i've had for a while... I picked him and his older brother up from school at the usual time and we walked the usual route...but he seemed really agitated on the way home. He usually picks up sticks and holds them in his hands (he always has to be holding something, sticks and rubber bands are his favourite things to hold). Today, he picked up a long stick and was bashing it against walls, then he did the same routine he's been doing for the past few days...moving from the pavement at a certain point to a patch of grass where he walks on his tiptoes and counts. Sometimes we go into a shop on the way home, but today when he asked if we could go in I said No, and that we'd go into another shop because I had to go to the bank. He ended up getting angry with me and crossed the road by himself which he knows he's not allowed to do...I never shout at him though as this upsets him even more. It took about 10 minutes to convince him to move but he was terrible the whole way to the bank. When we finally got to the other shop, he was in an awful mood! It took him about 10 minutes to decide what he wanted...which is usually the case whenever we go to a shop. He is terribly indecisive. Then he put the chocolate bar on the counter and when I touched it, he screamed at me for touching it and threw himself on the floor holding his ears. I felt really embarrassed as there were other people in the shop staring at him. Then for the whole way home which takes 5 minutes to walk, he repeatedly punched himself in the head saying "damn" over and over again. His older brother told him to be quiet at which point he screamed at him and pushed him. The woman who was walking in front of us gave him the dirtiest look. He only stopped doing the punching and saying "damn" when he saw his dad was waiting for him at the bottom of the street. By this time I was close to tears. He never tells me about school, I always ask him how school was and he always says "it was ok" or "it was horrible because people were horrible to me" but I can never get anything more out of him than that. His brother told me today that some boys from the year above him were hitting him in the playground so I think that may have something to do with him being so distressed today. I think I am so confused because he has never been diagnosed, but does this sound like typical behaviour of someone with ASD? I really need to be able to talk to other people in similar situations (like a support group) but I don't know where to look...

Well, I phoned them today about my son's case and it looks like i'm going to be waiting another 12 months until he gets an appointment. So, I think the only thing I can do with regards to the DLA forms is to fill them in and hope for the best! Right now though, this is how I am feeling -

Thank You Carol. I will give that a try now

Thank you for your replies. My son has signs/traits of Aspergers, well that is what most people who see him think and everything I have read about it seems to fit in with his personality and behaviour. After reading the replies, I have decided I will not apply for DLA because he doesn't need constant care or have anything that affects his needs. It is mainly myself who needs the support as I don't know how to cope with his behaviour sometimes. You asked what his main difficulties are. It is his behaviour mostly, he does not know how to behave with friends, he doesn't have alot of friends at school because he would rather be on his own. Also, he has tics such as clicking noises with his tongue, coughing, sniffing, squeezing his hands and jumping. It can get embarrassing though because he also has a habit of repeating what somebody has just said so we could be in a shop and a customer will ask for something and he'll repeat what they've just asked for. He doesn't like loud noises and often shouts at other kids if they are making alot of noise which is also embarrassing! So, it would be logical not to award a child with behavioural problems with DLA as he doesn't need any assistance. I can imagine a child with ADHD would probably be in the same situation?

Hi I am new to this site and I was just wondering if anyone could give me some information.I am a single, unemployed mother of two. My youngest child is 7 and currently awaiting assessment for ASD. He has been on the waiting list for about seven months and I am not too sure how long it will take before anything happens. I see a job advisor at the DSS every few months and I have mentioned my son's problems to them in the past. They said I might be able to claim DLA for him and Carer's Allowance and they have given me forms to fill in. But when I looked at the forms, they ask what problems the child has etc. I don't know if it is worth filling the forms in and explaining on them that he has no diagnosis yet. I really need some advice on this as I don't know who to ask - I don't really know anybody in the same situation. Also, could anybody tell me anything about the assessment process as I don't know how long we will be waiting, what to expect, what happens exactly in the assessment and also what to tell my son about it all. I am a little stressed about it all right now so any advice would be really helpful. Thanks.