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About PumpkinZero

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    Norfolk Broads
  1. Great advice there. I'll remember next time I see someone who is Autistic to tell them to grow up and get over it, I'm surprised Doctors didn't think of it before.
  2. I understand, I don't go out socially or even have any friends at all. I did stay in touch with one school friend but eventually we stopped contacting each other, it just seemed like it was all hard work and not at all like friends are on TV...you know, like 'best buddies', it was more like 'people with nothing in common occasionally speak'. As lonely as I am, I just don't have the patience or perseverance to put effort into something which (from my limited understanding) should be easy.
  3. Yes, I think having a concrete diagnosis would help me but I'm a bit reluctant to talk about it, I don't really think I could go to the Doctor and say "I think I have Asperger's Syndrome" after the humiliation of talking about depression, only for them to turn me away. But from a mental point of view I think a diagnosis would help me to accept it fully. I do have supplemented private healthcare from my employer so going private may be an option. Thanks
  4. Thank you Whilst I have not been diagnosed with Asperger's (haven't been back to the doctor since they turned me away) I am 100% certain that I have it, once I started researching it everything made sense. Do you think it's important to get a diagnosis?
  5. Hello all, I'm from Newcastle. It's so frustrating that people don't remember things like you do, you'll get a reply like "ummmm...oh yeah, I forgot all about it". How can you forget? Also, I find that if someone talks to me and I'm not sure how to respond I will observe others and then next time I will try and act how other people do. It's so weird that simple things like this take so much effort, putting on a huge drama show in order to communicate. Do you find this too?
  6. Hello everyone. In my adult life I've come to realise that I'm not like other people, at first I thought it was lack of life experience, maybe living a sheltered life but as years passed I came to understand that my mind is not like the minds of others. I never knew of Asperger's Syndrome, but around five years ago I began to think I was severely depressed. I went to the Doctor after three years of building up the courage to actually talk to them...and they didn't help me, they completely dismissed me. So I just carried on as usual, I started doing research into depression and OCD and eventually ended up looking at Autism, my Brother once said to me "just because I'm interested in something does not mean I want to know every little detail about it, why are you so obsessive?" and I slowly came to realise that this is the 'thing' that is broken inside me. I have no friends at all, my mind just can't comprehend making a conversation work, I don't look people in the eye and I don't talk to anyone at work (I work with around 100 people, which is daunting and terrifying to say the least). I have severe obsession issues: I will eat the same food for every meal, every day until eventually I find a new favourite and will do the same again. I once listened to the same CD every day, non-stop for over a year. The internet is probably my best friend and worst enemy, I have the answers to any question I could ask but I can easily spend 16 hours a day reading about the same things, day in, day out. There is a plus side: my attention to detail is excellent. It is also annoying as I see problems/ issues where others do not. I reject opportunities to socialise or even talk to people because of past experiences, I have very low confidence and self esteem. I refuse to answer the telephone or front door so I don't have to talk to strangers. These are just a small amount of the things I encounter every day. I've always wondered why no-one else is like me. Why does my mind run wild all the time? Why do I remember every single thing that happens to me, however insignificant, and then torture myself over the "what could've been"? As I read the article about Asperger's it was like I had an answer for my whole life. There are people like me, they are here on this forum.
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