essexgirl

Thanks all. I emailed my HV and told preschool. They said they are helping more with socialising. Especially since I told them about one boy in his class I occasionally have babysat and they've got on well then. I think they are going to try and pair them up more! One more thing - might be totally unrelated but recently he has become more fussy with his food (never used be, we thought he was just exercising his right to choose) and seems rather oddly attracted to bread, cheese and sausages! Wanting bread dry even. Rather pestering about being hungry. He recently had worms and has grown an awful lot in the last couple of months so thought it was that. However the worms have cleared up now. He is cows milk intolerant anyway (causes eczema) as am I - I have IBD. Could this be related at all?

I think the reason why they want to add more sessions is because of starting full time school in september. Such a big jump from a couple of morning, 6 weeks off and then all day everyday. After a few weeks of preschool he gets more settled and happier about going. Then we get half term or a holiday and he is back to how he started. Apparently he's perfectly good, seems happy and does as he is told. Just doesn't really join in with other children much. but he can do this at home with his brother and any older children who come round. He just tells me children his age are boring.

Thanks for the advice, observing him at preschool is what worries me. He is not himself there..worried they'll think he is stupid. He just needs time to get to know somebody properly before he can be himself! I really don't understand how he can be so different away from me. He's not like it when he stays with family overnight or anything either. I also know what my Mum will be like, she still had a go at me for things I did as a 4 year old. I'm never good enough no matter what I do and this will be one more thing for her to moan about me with. She will blame me for sure! Which upsets me as I've tried my best. Preschool just said ask the HV when he has his 3 1/2 year check and they are going to give him more sessions to get him used to it. They go school really early here (he'll be barely 4) so that worries me too. I wish they'd not said anything though, I had no worries beforehand. I knew he was a little wary of joining in really noisy groups but thought that was entirely normal and he'd be fine once he started school. He loosens up eventually, normally when it's time to go home!

Thanks for the lovely welcome! It was a shock..we don't really know other children and we just thought of him as different to his brother as everyone is unique. We knew he was a bit stubborn but he's not hard work really like I presumed children with behavioural problem were..if that makes sense! I don't want him having a label. I just saw his personality as having benefits later..if you are a bit bossy and stubborn you get things done, help change things in the world. Look at Bob Geldof for a start! It's also kind of frustrating that it appears other people don't see the same (funny and loving) boy we do. He behaves so differently at home or with family. They'd never told us of any concerns at school before. I think they were just waiting for him to settle down a bit before saying anything.

Preschool took us aside the other day to say my 3 year old was quiet at preschool and doesn't really socialise much. Total news to us! At home he doesn't shut up! He's always asking questions and is very affectionate. The only worry we had was the fact he bosses his brother about a bit but after a chat and cuddle he's fine, we just put it down to being a typical Leo. He's a very happy boy, and has a great imagination. Can see creatures in clouds and does alot of roleplay with his brother. He did talk a little later but we thought it was because his brother his exceptionally advanced and that we were unfairly comparing them. I'm all scared now, he does seem to have a few of the aspergers traits...but only in big groups. He is capable of playing with someone if they are an older child..just not his own age. He also has a funny sense of humour, likes to give the wrong answers to things (saying a cow goes woof for example) and laughs. He seems to not let on just how much he knows too. He can count..but preschool don't know this. He tells me other children are boring and it's babyschool. I've tried so hard to do everything perfectly, breastfed, unvaxed and they never eat rubbish. Everyone's going to blame me if he has something wrong. The only thing i've not done is take him out much to groups or other Mums homes as where I live there is no such opportunity. He only knows family. It's like no matter how hard I try i still get it wrong. Only person who won't blame me is my mother in law as she said before he was born he was indigo and i'll expect she'll put it down to that. Do you have any advice..anything I can do to undo this?