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kirky

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Posts posted by kirky


  1. Homework has always been a problem in our house! My son does not like school and home to overlap at all so getting him to do homework is a struggle. I don't know about statement provision but this is how we do it. Only 15 mins per nite, and I scribe for him. For instance : put these words into a sentence etc. I read out the question and then write down EXACTLY what he says. Homework is only supposed to tell the teacher how much your child understands about the subject, if my son can't do it then I send in a letter asking them to go over it again in school!


  2. I'm tired right down in my soul...

    I'm tired of having to make difficult decisions

    I'm tired of the constant worrying

    I'm tired of filling in forms

    I'm tired of having to pester people to do what they say they were going to do

    I'm tired of never having any money

    I'm tired of people thinking my son is just a rude disrespectful boy!

    I'm tired, but tomorrow is another day and perhaps I won't feel so sorry for myself!

     


  3. It's a real shame that your LA woman was so unhelpful. We have just finished with the statement process. They named his current school because we hadn't made a decision on where we wanted him to go. But when we decided we just wrote a letter saying we wished to change the school. That was a week and a half ago and we heard yesterday that he has been granted a place. Just waiting to hear when he can start. Maybe it was so easy because the statement had only just been finalized? Anyway, the decision on a special school placement rests with a panel of professionals who sit every 2 weeks. I think the basic criteria is that your son should be at least 5 years behind academically, for instance, my son is in year 7 but is only working at a level 2 rather than the average level 8. His current school doesn't really have a say in the matter, although a letter detailing his problems with mainstream situations from them would definately help if they would oblige. My sons school wouldn't, they thought it reflected badly on them that they couldn't manage him or hammer him into their square holes, when he is quite obviously a round boy! ;-) Good luck!


  4. Wow, tough one mumble. I'm assuming your mum meets all the legal requirements for carers allowance, ie amount of work hours etc. I'm guessing it's not a great relationship you have with your mum or she wouldn't be doing something which obviously makes you feel so uncomfortable. Have/can you discuss it with her, does she know how upset you are about it. Perhaps she might agree to a deal? You fill the forms in IF she will actually help you with the daily stuff you find difficult, like cooking. Disputes with parents are always the hardest, good luck mumble.


  5. One step at a time....The LA can place a child in a maintained special school without a statement if deemed necessary and if that is the case it can happen fairly quickly. Once in the school the child will be given a statement. We have just gone through the whole statement process and decided to seek a special placement after advice from his teacher and the LA. After reading lots of very helpful threads on here I was convinced that we were going to have to battle to get a private placement. As it happens we have found an absolutely fantastic headteacher of a local special school! I left the initial meeting with her thinking, wherever she is is where I want my son to be. A very knowledgable woman who has dedicated her life to understanding autism and making life better for children with it. The panel is sitting on Wednesday so fingers crossed they give him a placement. I guess what I'm saying is don't automatically discount the local maintained special schools, there are some good ones out there. If none are suitable then so be it, get your battle gear on! But don't spend lots of money on independent reports etc. until you've visited all of the schools on the LA list. Good luck!


  6. thanks for your reply. H is in year 7. He is miserable at this school and has made little or no academic progress in the 3 years he has been there. What is annoying is that the ed pysch new this when she wrote her report but none of it is in. the draft basicaly says for education he should be taught 'effective study skills' by a bog standard ta and he should be seated away from distractions and with a positive role model. What a load of rubbish!! They have sat him away from others for 3 years (in a class of 12) and it hasn't made a bit of difference. What he needs are teachers/ta with suitable aspergers/asd qualifications who know and care about the best way to teach him!!

    They have specified several small group sessions (social skills and literacy) which should have no more than 6 students. If he needs small group work to learn these things, why doesn't he need smaller class numbers for everything?

    I definately do not want him to stay at this school. we have found a brilliant independant aspergers school but there is no way he's gonna get there with a lame statment like this.


  7. Ok, so received the draft statement and, as expected, its utter rubbish! :-( What is my next step? Do I request a meeting with the LA to discuss what's wrong with it or will I be wasting my breath? Is this the point that I should consider getting my own ed psych report? All advice greatly received and appreciated!


  8. H has been having a problem with bullying at school for a long time. Many meetings have taken place about it, with very little result. Today he came home very upset/angry because he has been given an hour after school detention. This boy told the teacher that H had been calling him names, when in fact this boy had been continuously tormenting him all day. Even when doing cross country! The teacher did not allow him to respond, just put up her hand and said 'no discussion'. At this point H told her he wasn't ever coming back to this stupid school and stomped out. At home he has said if I make him go back he'll kill himself. I know he's unlikely to follow through on this threat, but it's awful to hear.

    So, what to do. My hubby wants me to go in with H in the morning and demand to see his teacher. I'm wondering if it might be better to keep him home for the rest of the week, let him calm down and also to show the school how much this is effecting him. What do you think?


  9. I know how you feel. In year 2 (before dx) my son encountered an 'old school' my way or the high way, you will conform teacher. She thought he was just a naughty little boy (even with all the reports saying otherwise) and she didn't like him disrupting her class. I found she reprimanded him far harsher than other children for the same thing. It does matter what kind of teachers they have! Last year (year 7) he had a teacher who liked him, even though he drove her mad! She helped him to avoid situations which were likely to cause problems.


  10. I think that my son may have dysgraphia. He won't hold the pen/pencil correctly, his writing is almost ilegible, he cannot space letters or words properly, his writing rarely sits on the line. He also writes some letters backwards and often uses capitals incorrectly. He has major problems copying ie from the blackboard, or from another sheet of paper, and often misspells words which he knows. In one of the many reports written on 'H' it was commented that he had problems processing the written word. I have an appointment with his paediatrician coming up and was considering asking for him to be tested. Any opinions or experiences would be gratefully received.

    Marie


  11. He's in year 7. when he was in year 4 i went to the doctor and asked for a referal to the local child health and development centre. We saw a paediatrician and i said i thought H had Aspergers. She looked at reports the school had sent, observed him and saw us once more before agreeing with me and diagnosing Aspergers syndrome. He was not seen by anyone else at the diagnosis stage. Throughout his school life, from nursery he has been seen by early years inclusion officers, ed's, the psychology and advisory support team (several times) but no mention of speech and language or occupational therapy. I feel bad now, was i supposed to initiate that?

    From the earliest reports written on him, they have said he needs small group work to progress. They have not ever specified less that 9 or anything, should i persue this on his statement ( when it arrives!).


  12. Sally you have been really helpful!! I'm not aware of H being seen by a SALT at any time in the assessment for statment process. I am meeting with his form tutor tomorrow and am going to request all of his termly reports so i have a record. When he left lower school they said he was working at level 2a in maths, two and a half years later his goal for this year is 3a and he likes maths!! if thats not evidence of lack of progress i don't know what is!! How would i go about getting an independant EP? and will it cost me?


  13. Any evidence at all that he worked better, or coped better in small groups or 1:1 is useful.

     

    Before our tribunal I carried out a Data Protection Act search. These can take up to and sometimes over 40 days for all the paperwork to get sent to you.

     

    But in those professional and school file notes we found alot of useful information including:

     

    Professionals stating in 2008 that my son needed to be in a dedicated environment in groups of not more than 8 peers [this info was buried by the LA, and not given to us or the first educational tribunal we went to]; questionnaires the SALT had given to the class teacher about his performance of certain skills in 1:1, small group, whole class environments when he was supported, and when he was not supported. This clearly showed that he performed at his best in 1:1 and small group environments when he was supported by an adult; some of my son's work had been completed out of the class, and the SALT file notes stated that "xxxx became so distressed because he could not do the work in the classroom that he took himself off into the corridor and did the best work he has every done outside in the corridor." The SALT then wrote to the teacher asking "Do you think it is relevent that xxxxx did his best piece of work out the classroom in the corridor?" I don't think I need to explain how useful that was at Tribunal to prove the whole class mainstream environment was unsuitable for him; an assessment given to school by the OT where they failed to notice any motor co-ordination difficulties [which CAHMS and my independent EP immediately recognised] - this proves that the school and professionals were not competent enough to recognise all his SEN; a file note from the SENCO to the LA in 2009 where she states "although the Statement says xxxx may have dyslexia, no professional has confirmed this." The SENCO and the LA then did nothing to ascertain IF my son had dyslexia - again this was another SEN they failed to identify or address. This proved that the school and LA and professionals were not doing their job properly according to the SEN Code of Practice or the according to the Education Act.

    You really need to thoroughly check the reports you do have to see if anyone talks about inconsistencies in learning, loss of learning, social communication difficulties, emotional difficulties, sensory difficulties etc too.

    If you are going to do a Data Protection Act search, then try to time it so that you do have enough time to get the info before the deadline for submitting evidence to Tribunal, and also try to time it to after any letters you sent into the LA/school/professionals asking them specific questions, because they may tell you one thing, and then say something different in any file note they make. Also try to do it after any major multi team meetings.

    As well as what you may find, it is just as important what you don't find. Eg. if the school say they have been in frequent contact with the EP due to your sons difficulties, but you find absolutely no evidence on file relating to that, then you can correctly point out at Tribunal that there is no evidence of any close working relationship or multi team approach as nothing was produced by the Data Protection Act search.

    Thanks a lot! Very helpful stuff. What does SALT stand for? We haven't seen any profesionals at all since his diagnosis 3 years ago, apart from the ed psych woman who came when he was being assessed for the statement that we haven't got yet!! How would i go about carrying out a data protection act search?


  14. Ok, so we're waiting for the draft statement to come (hopefully before xmas). In the mean time i'm looking at alternate schools because H cannot stay where he is. I've been to see an independant school 45mins away from where we live and loved it. I know its going to be a battle to get him there, but my question is this..... I know that this independant school has places and are willing to take him and that my LEA have sent kids there before, i also know that all of the alternate mainstream schools with autism units my LEA is likely to suggest are full. Will this make any difference when it comes to them making a decision? H is getting very close to refusing to go to school, he hates it there. Is there anything that i can be doing now to help our case? He's got an appointment with the specialist who diagnosed him coming up because of his current anxiety and stress issues, would a letter from her help? (the independant school also said they had kids refered from this center as well).

     

    marie


  15. ok, so my son has always been a sleepwalker. It's his main stress indicator for me. It usually happens when he's worried about school, tests, bullies etc. He gets up and turns all of the lights on in the house then goes back to bed.

    The problem is that he's having a bad time at school right now with a new form teacher and some bullying. Before when he sleptwalked it was once in the middle of the night, at the minute its a minimum of twice and its starting as soon as he's deeply asleep. It's as though as soon as his body relaxs his brain starts worrying.

    Last week he walked once a night every school night, on sunday night it was 5 times and 3 times every night since. He doesn't remember it in the morning which is good, but my husband and myself are getting really frayed around the edges!! We end up lying awake waiting for him to get up! It's hard to deal with H when i'm working on less than 4 hours sleep.

    I am trying to deal with the situation at school (if he wasn't in the middle of being assessed for a statement i'd yank him out of there). But how do i manage the sleepwalking? I've got an appointment with the doctor on friday but i'm unsure what to say, do i ask for meds to help him sleep through? or does he need to see a professional? Since he was diagnosed 3 years ago he hasn't seen professional outside of school. I'm really worried about his mental health right now. Should i pull him out of this school? We should get the provisional statement before xmas then i can choose a different school, but i don't want to isolate him from any social interaction with his peers. He even said today when asked that he thinks he would be better off going to a different school.

    I'm at the point where if anyone else says 'you look tired are you ok?' i'm gonna scream or cry!!

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