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for background information: my son went through a long phase of staring at people when they were naked-more curious than my other 2 children ever were in that regard. it became so uncomfortable that when he was 4 i put a ban on anyone being naked around him. i would then find him spying on us (he would quietly open the door and peer through the gap.) i twice found him playing/touching his younger brother sexually. he got in big trouble for that and i fully explained why his behaviour was inappropriate and how it makes people feel. he hasnt done this again as far as i know. he has flashed himself at his brother and i worry as they share a room, what else may be going on? he is very often fondling his anus-and putting toys in that area-i see him in the bath sometimes purposely sat on a toy and he has put toys between his buttocks recently. he actually went over the top with the whole privacy thing. he would seek privacy for himself when getting changed even though he wasnt planning on changing his boxers etc. we recently explained to him that it is not okay to stare at someone-if we happen to see another person naked we simply avert our eyes. it is never ever okay to touch another, but if we want to touch/explore ourselves we can do that in private as it is our bodies and our decision. it is fine to see others in their underwear as we are family-if i am comfortable to be seen in my underwear and it doesnt make him uncomfortable to see that, then there is no problem-i told him this as his siblings and me and my partner are very much more open about these things. his siblings only have natural harmless curiosity-simply asking questions etc. today: it was hot last night do i went to bed naked-it was around 3am and i got undressed in my bedroom so no one but my partner knew i was naked. my partner leaves at 5am for work and i woke when he left but fell back asleep again after a few minutes. the next time i woke it was because i felt someone touching me-lower back between my buttocks (right at the top where they meet) SORRY FOR ALL THE DETAILS! i knew immediately that it wasnt my partner as i had seen him leave for work already so i quickly rolled over and saw someone disappear over the side of the bed. then my 8 year old stood up and i asked him just what the hell he was doing. he said he was looking at me. clearly he was doing more than that though. i am absolutely sickened. my son doesnt know this but his father (my partner) isnt actually his father. his father is a man i had a year long relationship with and he was sexually abusive towards me resulting in his 5 year imprisonment. this fact makes me all the more disgusted. can these things be genetic? i may be over reacting but due to my past and having been touched etc sexually, in an abusive manner, i cant even describe my feelings. i dont care if he is only 8, i dont care too much if he was just curious-all i know is that i feel disgusting and dirty all over again. how could my own son do that to me? i am terrified for my other children. again, i am probably over reacting but i cant help the way i feel. i am horrifically sensitive and uncomfortable at the best of times with being touched due to my past experience. anyone would be.