roleplaying and other things that have worked for us

[taran0]

these thigns have prob been mentioned before but i thought it would be great to share

 

my son now 3 almost 4 has been having a hard year and we have really struggled with him, i have been very busy with work and study at the same time and his behaviour has dropped being very hard to deal with, possessive, violent, whingy etc, etc it has been a knightmare and my wife has been callign em at work crying some days.he also has been very violent towards one year old sister, who likes to pinch everyone.

 

well now, his behaviour compared to 6 months ago has improved 200%

 

what we did to have such a dramatic change over 6 months, i don't really know...

 

I started working less days a week, took more time with him, to play footy, to play games, to dance, to run about and be silly, take him to the park, just to be around and be a lazy dad

 

I bought him an old imac for �20(the multicoloured ones), very old and slow, but he loves it can do painting look at his photos and play music and watch finding nemo dvd, only two wires and everythign is built in inc speakers and mic. a GREAT BUY! do it now and cheap as chips. now when i work on the computer he works on his and doesnt feel left out.

 

the best thing i did was ROLEPLAYING

i said to him you be the daddy and i will be the kid, so i got him to dress me, feed me ,carry me down the stairs, and sometimes i would have a little tantrum

 

the funniest was when he was changing my clothes and i had a tantrum over not wanting to wear the blue jeans and he told me off and said that mummy said i had to wear them and i really blew off into a tantrum and pretended to cry

and you KNOW what he said

 

"Don't worry daddy, your going to be ok, OK? don't worry."

 

just try it its good fun too, he will now bring my food in to me, bring me a drink, and get me more when i need it. also whenever i am doing some work around the house I give him a job to do and he loves it. in a weird way him being on the other side of the tantrum and being the parent has made him appreciate us more.

 

he comes up to us now every now and again and says "are you ok?" "daddy is a good boy"

 

you need to get kids involved and treat them like a bit of an adult as if they have an active duty and role in the house, give them some responsibility and encouragement. i get him to hold my tools for me, carry stuff, hold things and explain to him what i am doing so he can ask questions, and show him how to fix things. he now brings me his toys and says can we fix this.

 

he loves washing the car, loves holding the hose pipe, so we do that every week. i also sorted out the backgarden which was a jungle and made a nice lawn so he can play outside as he hated being stuck indoors.

 

needless to say, he is much happier, and a joy to be around

he comes up to us now and sometimes says

"I love you aswell" (dunno what the aswell means, but its cool)

 

Still has a tantrum now and again, and cant stand his little sister touching him, but he can actually play with her now and has become quite protective and caring over her. i am able to discipline him more now as he knows that we know that he can behave better.

 

hopefully we can continue this good period

taran0

[Enid]

What a lovely dad you are! <'> Enid

[Sooze2]

Wow, that makes such lovely reading.

 

Would you like to come and live here? Don't worry my DH can swap - its not a problem honestly.