I think I've messed up

[Tally]

I was just coming home pushing my bike through the path that runs through nextdoor's garden. I physically could not get through my gate as their bin has been parked close to the gate, and now there is a bike across the gate as well! Having almost being garotted by their washing line which sits at neck level across the path, I was really annoyed. They must have heard me clattering about and cursing them because the woman came out and asked me if I had a problem. I tried not to get angry and just said I could have done without the obstacle course. She muttered something or the other and I decided to tell her about the dogs coming in my garden and messing all over it. She said it was the landlord's fault because he hadn't got the fence sorted and the dogs slip under the gate, so I said she probably needs to supervise them until the fence is fixed, and she said she would so we'll see.

 

So my first meeting with them hasn't exactly been a success. She didn't catch me at a good time really, but they really are being plain selfish to block a gate that provides access to 3 houses, and they clearly do realise about the dogs coming into my garden and hadn't considered doing anything to stop them. At the time I thought I was standing up for myself, because they are clearly being completely unreasonable and selfish, but now I think it came out all wrong and I am now stuck living nextdoor to people who hate me because I am so horrible.

 

I've also upset my friend and I don't know how, but I don't exactly have enough friends that I can afford to upset any of them. He is not talking to me at all since we spoke on the phone on Monday.

[cmuir]

Hi

 

Don't be hard on yourself. I think I would have been displeased about having to go through an assault course before getting to my front door. Sounds like you were calm and straight to the point. That's no bad thing. Remember they're the ones being inconsiderable to say the least. Now they know where you stand, hopefully they'll be more considerate.

 

With regards to your friend, would you feel able to make the first move and say that you value his friendship and agree for both of you put your differences (sorry, don't know the details) behind you?

 

Best wishes

 

Caroline.

[warrenpenalver]

It would be harsh to say your "neighbours/siblings of satan" hate you yet!!

 

What exactly is the status of this path?? Im having difficulty visualising what you mean?? Is it just like shared pathways between terraces??

 

Id say that if its an access pathway for 3 houses then they have NO right to block it. There is usually some clause written into the property details about shared pathways. I would approach the landlord as thats the person who holds that detail (or should know how to get it!!).

[Tally]

It's technically a Public Footpath, but the only people who have reason to use it are people who need access to the back gardens of the five houses it leads to. It runs along the back of the houses, between the house and the garden. They definitely should not be blocking it, but I wouldn't really mind if they left a reasonable alternative way to walk. At the moment there is not space for a person pushing a bike to get through the gate.

 

I sent my friend a chatty email after we spoke on the phone and I have had no reply. I sent another one just saying I hoped he was OK and hoped to hear from him soon. And nothing. I think I need to leave it a few days before I send another.

[warrenpenalver]

Blocking public rights of way is a serious issue and usually the councils are quite hot on it. Obviously this is a last resort.

 

With your friend did it end on an arguement?? He may just be busy, ill or away for a few days!!

[Tally]

AARRRGH!!! I went out last night and it was really hard to open the gate at all. When I eventually got through there was something on the floor that I nearly tripped over, and when I shut the gate it swung easily, but left behind a piece of wood! When I got home this morning, in daylight, a piece of wood and a piece of plastic were leaning up against the gate, but not actually attached to it. I got through the gate and of course, I couldn't reach to replace them behind me! Can they not see that it is a gate, not a brick wall? It is designed for people to walk THROUGH. Even if they aren't aware of the official status of the path, they must be really quite stupid if they cannot tell that there are gates so that people can get through them.

 

They didn't come and have a go at me today at least.

[warrenpenalver]

Was this piece of wood just resting on the gate or wedged so as to prevent it opening???

 

It seems to me your nieghbours are either totally stupid or doing it deliberately, wether its out of malice or ###### mindedness i dont know. To be frank i think you need to involve the landlord. Maybe speak to the other houses affected that way 4 houses against one rented out new tenant means youve got numbers on your side and hopefully they will comply to avoid being known as the "nasty nieghbours".

[Tally]

Someone else has had a go at them and it's all sorted now. If I see them I will thank them for sorting it out, so as to try to salvage the mess I have made. I have to live next door to them and I don't want them to hate me.

 

However, I have uncovered a network of people who have been covertly supporting me. This network involves relatives, colleagues and neighbours. I am annoyed that people have gone behind my back and talked about me, although I can't honestly say that I don't need this. I don't actually know who knows what, I feel embarrassed and very silly, but also kind of pleased that people think I am worth it. Not really sure how to feel about it to be honest.

[Suze]

Hi Tally, glad its sorted , just wanted to add thhat if they have just moved in perhaps they were,nt quite aware of how much the gate and path are used.Perhaps they thought that most of the time people would use their front doors and not the back.Sometimes peopl with a shared access just use the path at the back to put bins out once a week, IYSWIM., SUZEX

[Tally]

Maybe that's true, Suze. I use it every day and the other two houses beyond me use it every day with their dogs. I thought maybe they didn't realise the proper status of the path and thought they could discourage strangers from walking through their garden by making it awkward.