Son anounced he has Aspergers & everyone hates him

[saffronsunflower]

Hello again,

 

My son anounced today that he told people today that he has Aspergers & everyone hates him!

 

I don't actually think that's what happened, son was just recently Dxd we decided he was a bit too young to take it on board as he is just nearly 6.

 

I think that his big brothers friends has defended him in playground and he has heard someone say he has aspergers, i am worried that this will cause him more anxiety not knowing about it...

When he made anouncement he was in on way to bed & a lot of other stuff was going on so we just focused more on the people don't like me part of the conversation, & tackled that part of talking to him but we were so thrown about how to broach the subject.

 

I know there are good books on the subject, but he is just in P1 and doesn't read yet himself and i'm really not sure how to explain to a 5/6 year old about having Aspergers.

 

So for the 2nd time in 2 days... does anyone have any suggestions?

 

Cheers

 

Nic

[Diane]

Hi

 

difficult, I am sat here trying to think what I would do if I were in your shoes.

 

I used to read a bedtime story to my son when he was that age. If you have an age appropriate book that tells a story about Aspergers I would try reading it to him as just that a story and see what his response is.

 

I still use story's to engage my son about difficulties he is having and he is now 14. I make up a lot of my own, I find he is more open to discussing things if it is through a third person even though he knows the character in the story is ultimately him. When he has and understanding of what the story is about he says thats like me and then we discuss what has happened and how it has affected him.

 

I do not know if this will help. Sorry if it does not.

[JsMum]

Its amazing how many children do actually understand what Aspergers Syndrome is, dont forget children will come across other children in school now with Aspergers Syndrome because of early diagnosis so in some way it is possitive, also younger children may have older siblings with Aspergers Syndrome because the usual age for diagnosis is around 9 because of social difficulties are more noticable because the gap widens as their peers mature into more social context.

 

I have a book that is aimed at ages 6-12yrs old, and its got some good explanations with illistrations, the book is called, CAN I TELL YOU ABOUT ASPERGERS SYNDROME A guide for friends and family. By Jude Welton.

 

There is many books coming out now for children to read, I strongly feel that as more children enter mainstream who have Aspergers Syndrome or High Functioning Autism, ADHD, Dyslexia, They should be awareness assemblies, to go throw how to help children who may have difficulties making or keeping friends, again it also comes into offering spersific socail groups where they learn social skills training.

 

J often said he doesnt have any friends, many children wanted to be his friend but they knew it was just so difficult because of Js reactions and the way he misunderstands social context, a lot of children like J, but been Js friend it has to be a very special relationship, as he has got older he is learning slowly the qualities in a friendship and social stories have helped with his understanding.

 

 

J is much better at one to one friendships and with a lot of guidance to support both J and the other child.

 

 

Making friends is actually a hard thing to do.

 

JsMum

Edited September 26, 2008 by JsMum

[Suze]

Hi, just think you,ve gotta be really honest here.Perhaps say, you know when you get angry about such and such, or you know when this upsets you , or when you struggle with this etc, well that is because you have a condition called aspergers.It means you will struggle more than other children to do some things.However it also means he,s special because he is different,..........then I would stress all his gifts etc and how they make him the special boy he is.We have always addressed our sons differences quite openly, but we have tried to really emphasise the positives AS has given him, eg, his musical abilities, his big hugs , his funny sense of humour, . As much as he may feel that having AS is a bad thing I,d just try and tell him how it makes him who he is and how special he is because of it.......if that makes sense

[LittleRae]

Hi Saffronsunflower. As he's so young, you could try the bedtime story route. Kathy Hoopman has written a few good books about Asperger Syndrome - 'The Blue Bottle Mystery' is the first one. It would allow him to identify with the boy in the story and you could take it from there.