Thought he was getting better but then we had holidays ...

[peaches]

I really thought Raph was getting better. We get a lot less negative reports from his new school, he fits in well, seems actually to be popular, when we are leaving school lots of kids shout his name and wave or say bye. Then came Christmas. He got a line in the Nativity play and to all intents and purposes was doing really well. There were 3 performances I was due to see him on the third day as this was the day his sister was in it two (part timer). He wouldnt go to school on that day, not because of the play or so he said, he just wouldnt get up. As Christmas was getting closer we were finding it harder and harder to get him to bed at night and having got him there he wouldnt settle down and was bouncing around in his room until the early hours.

 

Throughout the Christmas holidays he has been an absolute pain in the ######. Every two minutes one of the girls has been coming to me in tears saying Raphy has hurt me. I have threatened to take his electronic games etc away from him if he continues, and I would like to think I could do this, but if I do and he has nothing to do he will be worse than ever. He is fine whilst he is on the DS or the Wii or the game cube or the computer, the rest of the time he is just a torment. I really really cannot do with him 24/7 and I cant wait for him to go back to school. There isnt a playscheme at Christmas or he would be going there. That's how I usually get through the summer!

 

Monday cannot come soon enough.

[JsMum]

 

 

 

If you say your going to ban his Consoles/computer and he does hurt others and then you do not ban his Consoles/computer he will continue to hurt others, he has no consequences.

 

I have had at times ban every electric devise going in the past due to him been violent, and I think why we had to go the extreame was to test me, in the end he hadnt anything to do for an entire 24hrs, and he made it very hard for me to cope with his behaviour but I knew I had to keep to my word otherwise it was an empty threat and he wouldnt have any deterant to stop his violent behaviour, others are getting hurt here, it has to be taken as serious as an assault in the street.

 

J has a 24hr ban, he gets it back after that, but if he then begins to repeat the violence then it is banned again.

 

I do give him a verbal warning so he can make a decision to stop or continue.

 

I have in the past stripped his bedroom to the bare bones, just basic bedroom furniture, bed, draws, but no toys/consoles whats so ever.

 

If bedtimes have been a problem then a visual routine can work well for structure, with a very basic tasks and consoles off a couple of hours before bedtime, a bath, Pjays, Supper, story, lights out ect....

 

I would look at a reward for each task he follows, and a cut off time where he has to achieve them, so in bed 9pm ect... and then if he gets so many tokens he can earn extra time on the consoles/computer or some new games for them at the weekend.

 

Jay is out of syncs too due to later rising and later bedtimes, so were going to be working on a very similair struture.

 

Goodluck.

 

JsMumxx