Dealing with uncertainty

[RainbowsButterflies]

I'm really struggling when I don't know what's going to happen. I find it incredibly stressful, particularly when it's something important over a prolonged period of time, and any pointers would be really helpful.

 

I don't want to give the specifics, but I have to wait on someone else's decision. I know what the recommendation is, and what the decision probably will be, but it's still not a definite. And the date for the decision has been moved back. It affects my whole career. And I wouldn't even be in this position if it wasn't for someone else's unprofessionalism

 

My stress levels are through the roof. I can't make decisions on the simplest things. Help would be very much appreciated.

 

 

[Mumble]

I struggle greatly with uncertainty and not knowing what's going to happen, even things that are a long way in the future that really aren't going to affect me tomorrow or even next month, but because I know they will have some impact on me (but I don't know what that impact will be) at some point in the future, they cause high levels of anxiety and affect my ability to function. Ridiculous really, because the anxiety then inhibits my self-help skills to cope with whatever uncertainty is causing the anxiety ...

 

In the not so distant past, uncertainties and the resultant anxiety were so debilitating that they stopped me doing things I needed to function and lead to mental health difficulties. I now have a fantastic team of people who support me and help me to find ways of coping with exactly this sort of thing. One of the major things we've done is have a really clear plan written out showing when different things might happen (the might is important - no 'wills' because that increases anxiety if they don't happen) and what the implications might be. It also details what action I and others need to take (and the others are informed) and when. It shows when the right time is when I'm 'allowed' () to worry about something and therefore contains my anxiety that I should be doing something but at the same time not being sure what that something is. I suppose it's a very planned version of 'well if you can't do anything about it now, don't worry about it'! :lol:

 

Is there anything you can practically do about this situation now? If not, put the new date on your planner, and then focus on focusing on the now things - list what needs to be done, what you need to do to do those things, and make a reasonable plan for getting them done. If there are things that can be done (i.e. making plans for different decision outcomes) do that in the same way.