iwilldothebestican Report post Posted September 15, 2012 hello I am new here and this is my first post. I have a son of 18 which has aspergers. His main interest is early war history mainly Japan. He love heavy and metal and plays electric guitar and also has an interest in learning more jujitsu. We live in a very rural area in spain and although his childhood was the perfect playground. He spent hours moving battle figures around our wild land often bossing his friends around and telling them were they could place thier figures. I took him out of the local school when he was 12 as he wasn't able to learn there or get though a day without hitting another kid. We have had tutors and as we have internet access he is a very much self educated intelletual who know his way around the world map and has a very good gasp of world history. he can bearly hand write and his maths is a very basic arithmetic standard. He refuses to do any dirty work like touching other poeples dirty dishes and refuses to help around the farm due to sunlight sensitivy. His father lives in uk with young son and parnter and I have been hoping he would be able to live with them and go to college to get some basic qualifications so he could go on and study history,but the parnter can't cope with him I guess it's not her problem and she doesn't need to say yes. Anyway I was really banking on this and so was he. he is refuses to get out of bed, won't eat until say 4 in the afternoon is getting locked into a game and talking in a very irritated way every time I talk to him I think he feels trapped here. All of the kids he grew up with have left to uk and his younger brother is going out and socialising getting work and girlfriends and he must be thinking his life is doomed. What can I do with him. Doesn't he need an address in uk to study there and how do I get that where would I go? So far he doen't even have a official diagnosis. Please don't think I am a rubbish parent I really am doing the best I can. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
smileyK Report post Posted September 15, 2012 have you thought of NAS (National Autistic Society)? maybe offer advice,help and support? we don't think your rubbish parent at all in fact the opposite in trying find help/support for your son to may his future happier /brighter i do believe you are doing the very best you can! if he refusing to get out of bed not eating til late in afternoon would you say he is depressed??? XKLX Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
In Exile Report post Posted September 15, 2012 (edited) Depression doesn't necessarily go hand in hand with AS but it is certainly more prevalent so, even statistically, it is a distinct possibility. I'd certainly suggest talking to your son's doctor about it. You didn't mention why you and your boys are in Spain. Are you a Spanish national? I'm just wondering whether any practical possibility exists for you to relocate to the UK. If you want to find external help for your son, I'm pretty sure that a formal AS diagnosis will be a prerequisite. I'll leave it for others to outline what help might be possible, at least in the UK, bearing in mind that your son is now an adult. Best wishes to you. Edited September 15, 2012 by In Exile Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
iwilldothebestican Report post Posted September 15, 2012 I would say he's always low level depressed but I think this is due to circumstances at times when things are low like this I give him 5 htp and he perks up but he often refuses to take anything that would help adjust his sleep patterns. We have been living in spain 18 yrs but english. with my other son finishing school it's hard but not impossible for me to move back long enough to get him sorted but I couldn't stay there and split up are family. The best scenario for me is that he could live in a residential college in uk... its difficult without an address in uk.. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
