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social sevices help

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not posted in here forever so sorry that its about something like this but really could do with some urgent help


my aspergers son has a daughter who is nearly 2, he is not with her mother but has been having contact with her 3 days a week since she was born.


today out of the blue social sevices turned up and said there is a problem with him seeing his son because of his disability, apparently the mother has suddenly decided she thinks he is a danger and has told these social workers a load of twaddle about how his disability affects him and now they need to assess him and his girlfriend who is also his carer.


apparently she has a problem because she says because he is a goth he dresses his daughter in black all the time and refuses to let her wear pink (he doesnt he doesnt even have any black clothes for her and the only reason he doesnt have pink for her is ALL the clothes her mother has for her are pink)


she has a problem because apparently he always removes her bobbles which he doesnt his daughter tends to pull them out and he doesnt put them back in


she is also saying she has a problem because he doesnt like to go out on his own which he doesnt he does have a problem with crowds of people and things but at the end of the day thats why hs girlfriend is his carer and she is always there.


apparently these are ALL legitamate concerns for him not having contact with his daughter which apart from the going out one i cant really see what the problem is.


the social worker also said to him in her experience people with disabilitys dont generally make good parents!!! can she really say this???


i guess what im asking is how much can the social services use his disablity against him, especially since this one seems to have a pre concived idea of his ability to manage, and what can we do to help his case?


trace x

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I don't have answers but know whatever is said can be, and often is denied.

Email can provide a good evidenced record that can't be denied.

I'd email, or support son to email the social worker asking her to 'substantiate and quantify' her concerns in writing.


Regarding using disability against him - they should not discriminate but be very wary and compliant with the 'Equalities act 2010'


If there must be meetings its my understanding its within the law to record for 1st party use (ie: for personal record). It also might be said this would be a reasonable adjustment to allow processing but whether they agree or not I'd record all via mobile phone app. This can also help as sometimes it can show if we or they have misinterpreted etc.

From what you have said there is no legal way they can prevent any contact (at this stage) so be wary of giving them any excuse.

Email is a good way to get objections and facts on record but do be careful as what is in writing can be used against a person if its not carefully worded.


Be patient while the truth comes out and try to be quietly confident rather than panic ... Note some of your sons positive aspergic attributes to add to your case when needed ... honesty commitment, trustworthy, reliability etc .....sorry I have nothing more useful to add ...good luck

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