What shall I do?

[mum22boys]

I have been called into the school to see the head about a referral she is making to the autism advisory teacher for M. I need to go through the form with her.

Basically she went on a course before half term on autism because I lost my temper with her because of how stressful m finds school and they don't seem to listen. They now seem to realise what I have been saying about him appearing to cope in the last six months plus is true.

However today i received a copy of the school report they sent in for m to the DLA. It contradicts everything i have said and makes me look a liar. She has magically forgot how he can't cope with sports day etc and tried to escape from school. not to mention the teachers he has hit in tantrums. She put and underlined that these problems occured out of school hours - as if I was to blame.

I am furious and am going to confront her but part of me thinks what is done is done and she can't undo the letter to the DLA.

 

What should I do?

 

mum22boys

[Zemanski]

If the DLA doesn't go through you can get a second letter to add to your appeal, probably best to wait till the decision comes through though (not sure on that but you could check with the carers support group)

 

for now you should concentrate on getting school right I think - the referal is definitely going in the right direction but it looks like you're going to have to be firm with this head

 

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Zemanski

[Flora]

mum22boys. You could ask her to write a letter for your new evidence you are sending for reconsideration of the DLA decicision; if she agrees to do this, ask her to give it to you so that you can send it in with the rest of your stuff. If she doesn't agree to do this, then you should complain to the Board of Govenours (there should be one who deals with SEN).

 

You can also put in a written statement about the latest developments (HT going on autism course and calling in outreach service) when you send things to the DWP; which hopefully your HT will also put in her letter (if she agrees to write it)

 

Our school's HT is just like yours and I totally understand your frustration. She's got selective blindeness when it comes to the kids in that school; ie, the bright ones get loads of perks, some of them have been on enrichment courses etc; but the SEN kids get absolutely nothing unless the parents are like me and make a lot of noise. She also scuppered my application for DLA but I did get it after requesting reconsideration of the decision. Don't give up (which I'm sure you won't)

 

Lauren

[rainbow queen]

not sure what to advice but sure the others know better just saying i know how madding all this is as i just recieved ot report and its rubbish and they have also not took on board what i said ,and this report will also be asked for by the dla-for the mobilty section which ive just applied for my boy.

 

its so never ending -ive never known anything like this before-its like living in the twighlight zone you speak they agree you come home then get a report discounting everything you just said

 

 

im still new to all this but from what ive seen this tends to be the general picture

[mum22boys]

Have seen her and told her I wasn't happy

 

I told her she made me look like a liar and that she didn't put everything on there she could have. She said the form is so black and white with the questions that it was difficult to put anything else. I asked her to write a letter for me for my reconsideration and put everything down - including asking the other teachers their opinions. She has agreed. She said some things occured after the form she filled out! I told her i wouldn't know as he has so many tantrums I lose count.

 

And just to prove me right he has a tantrum after school because I parked in the opposite direction to what i usually do. Oh but I forgot m is just a bit lacking in confidence and has no issues!!!!!

 

Will wait to see what the letter says (or doesn't say!)

 

mum22boys

[rainbow queen]

glad you told them ,[im finding doing that very hard to do seeing as my sons in a no mans land with no dx yet-and the way things are going doubt if he ever will get one--i know hes not as bad as alot of children with probs but its still there all the same and as im his mum i feel i shouldnt just keep quiet to please the teachers/hospital ect....]

i also get the "hes lacking in confidence" jargon too. and just like you said when you left the school that a melt down occured over positon of your car thats exactly what i get/and other similar stuff and yes it too happens right outside the school door so hence it must be me then -its really me with the probs because i got a naughty child,and as its occured outside school and at home its not there prob.

[clintess]

hiya ive just been through similar thing.it was the dh /senco that didnt fill in ds learning/speech difficulties and basically made me look like a liar.

i didnt know what she put on form till i went to appeal and they ent all copies to me.The sch already wasnt meeting ds needs and i had moved him to another sch.i have to be honest i went mad.wrote to chair of govs and lea whom got the sch to eventually(several mths of letter writting) to admit she filled in the form incorrectly but still no apology so i wrote to local mp and sent all letetrs to do with complaint including mp letter to the dla appeals,after i had been turned down.

i still cant belive to this day they ignored all medical evidence form pead/community nurse/salt and went on this one womans unprofessional word.the mp since has got the shadow minister for education for kent involved and he has told both the lea and school that this senco cannot fill anymore forms in and that no sch is judge and jury and how they made ds look like he wasnt sen when indeed he is.when a serious complaint goes in and due to their grossly not meeting ds educational needs(they basically ignored his needs) he will be sorting this senco out.lucky for me one of his areas of interest is sen especailly asd.so now im waiting for his further info as he was calling a county hall meeting about this school and how it treats sen children.

meanwhile the appeal tribunal have set aside last appeal due to incorrect evidence and i have a new appeal hearing date on the 30 of next month.to get this sorted has taken me nearly a year but i am the kind if a injustice has been done and im like a dog with a bone and wont give up.

i wish you every luck and yours can be recitified if your prepared to stand up for your sons rights.it wont happen overnight but you will be doing your child and every other sen children a great service.