JJ's mum

My boy was diagnosed at 5 with Aspergers Syndrome but thats only because the process took so long. He was referred shortly before his 4th birthday.

Thanks for this, I had a read of a few pages on Amazon too- it looks good and very readable so I placed an order for it.

Its great that your son recognises his strengths. My son is also great with instructions and his ability to spell words backwards blows my mind! Its always better to be more focused on your strengths than weaknesses so it sounds like your first chat went well. My boy was diagnosed around 6 weeks ago and ive still not found a way to tell him.

Sounds bliss! Ive just got a degree last year and I think my computing department was full of Autistic people and most of them were among the most successful students/lecturers because of the ability to focus on a subject. I didnt read past page 18 of that book online because it just didnt ring true to what ive seen of the Autistic people that Ive met. I will be following this thread though because it is very relevant to me as im wondering how to tell my son as I dont want him to think im trying to say there is something "wrong" with him. Im not sure why im worried though as he is 100% certain he is perfect im not sure he would ever think otherwise!

Sounds bliss!

I was shocked reading some of this book on Amazon too as my son was diagnosed with Aspergers around 6 weeks ago aged 5 and I was thinking of telling him soon. It said the best time to tell a child is when they are saying they want a family, house, fast car etc..... Im not sure I agree that telling a child that they have Autism when they have (in my opinion) perfectly realistic expectations from life is the best thing. Ok so my son has poor coordination so maybe driving a fast car may be tricky but at the end of the day everyone dreams. If a person with autism has the capacity to dream of having a family, house and car then they surely also have the capacity to achieve their dream. Im sorry but im not going to be the one to shatter my sons dream, Im a dreamer myself and if he only dreams of a flat and a skoda ill be the one encouraging him to dream of a mansion and a porsche! Noone gets anywhere in life without dreams and ambitions. Call me thick but how can they suggest that Autism is a reason to stop dreaming. I fail to see how this isnt achievable for a person with Autism or in fact most disabilities. My husband has cerebral palsy and is a wheelchair user and we have our first child together on the way, the car ordered - albeit mobility! and a house. End of rant!!

Ive been around on and off for around a year when we first realised my son had problems which we thought were Aspergers. Anyway he has now been diagnosed although he is currently doing well at school ( he is only 5 though) so I will probably be around a bit more looking for advice on various issues now we know for certain that he has Aspergers. It took around 10 months from start to finish to get a diagnosis for him which was a bit of a shock as we feel he hides it quite well to the outside world. He is very much more himself when he is at home with his family and more of his traits become obvious as he is more relaxed . Anyway Hi to everyone!

My son was the same, he went ever so brave but it was too much for him and keeps talking about it several months later. That blood test was 100% necessary since it was believed he had meningitis. Thankfully he didnt but it was looking very like it so I think they did the right thing persevering to do it. Even the doc who referred him couldnt see the point of it so it is hard to see how it is worth it. It would just be reinforcing his current fear of hospitals.

I didnt think you gave the impression that you though it was a reason not to have children, I am more concerned about the NHS and the way this nanny state is heading they may well do in the future. I have definitely decided against the genetic testing and will leave the decision to my son when he is older. Looking at symptoms of fragile x, I think that it is unlikely that he has it and am certain it would cause more trauma than the possible benefits of knowing.

Thanks everyone for the replies. I think you are right in that the diagnosis of Aspergers isnt a negative thing. It has helped me a lot to know that it wasnt just me imagining his difficulties. The school say he is fine now and he is happy there although his behaviour after school is worse. He likes the routine and until he faces difficulties as I have been told he will particularly with English comprehension by the specialist speach therapist there is no need for intervention but I do feel the diagnosis is accurate. It is just that after being told that he didnt have the problems id described by the school and that it was just my parenting by my mum I was certain he wouldnt be given a diagnosis. I guess deep down it is a relief to know that there is a name for his difficulties. Thanks again everyone.

Im not sure to be honest. I doubt this is the reason as all the family history is on my ex husbands side of the family. Having any more children with him is the last thing on my mind! I am however pregnant so maybe it has something to do with it. But if that is the reason then Id burst their bubble because my son is gorgeous. Id rather 10 of him than 2 like my daughter who is currently making it her lifes mission to answer back as much as possible. It has been noted that my son doesnt smile so maybe that has something to do with the test but I think whatever the reason is, Im refusing it especially since it is a big blood test and on same ward he was in when he had suspected meningitis and hence the blood test. I dont see a reason to avoid having children because of the possibility of aspergers. Im a believer that normal is overrated.

Yes that is the one. The paediatrician didnt know if there were any benefits for him either, only to detemine a genetic link as there is evidence to suggest that Autism is inherited and in my sons case there is a history on his fathers side. My reservation with being diagnosed with a genetic condition it is possible, even if unlikely that he could be counselled about the risks of having children. I wouldnt want him to feel that it could lead to his children being affected and it is certainly irrelevant at age 5!

My son had a 4 1/2 hour assessment today with the multi discplinary team or something like that. They have said he has aspergers syndrome and that is the teams expert diagosis. However they asked me whether I would like them to make the diagnosis formally to the school etc or whether I would just like his difficulties listed. They also asked if I would like a blood test for some genetic condition that has been linked with Autism. I was wondering if anyone had any advice as to what to do. My immediate reaction to the blood test is to refuse as son is petrified as he had one when the docs suspected meningitis a few months ago. I dont want to needlessly make his fears worse. Im not sure at all whether a diagnosis will help him. A year ago his difficulties were more apparent but he is doing well at school and the specialist teacher has said no intervention necessary. He is 5 and just started school in September but has no problems and can now accept that the timetable changes sometimes. Do you think a diagnosis helps?

OK, who was it that didnt want to go to the cutty sark? http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/london/6675381.stm Looks like it is gone forever :-(

2 Questions: 1) is it agreed that the meet is on 14th July? If so: 2) Can I come? Been following the thread for some time since I couldnt make june due to house move and wedding, or 7th July as it the last day of honeymoon. 14th July should be ok but would have to bring new husband who is wheelchair user. Anyone know how accessible greenwich is by public transport. I know you can get there by boat from central london but not sure if all are accessible. I will prob bring my son (4) too as it is his kind of day out but leave my daughter behind.